


Midnight Call

by Bramadian0336



Series: Midnight Call [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alpha Kylo Ren, Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Angst, Animal Instincts, Death, Dominant Kylo Ren, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Horror, Magic, Mates, Mystery, Paranormal, Possessive Kylo Ren, Protective Kylo Ren, Slow Burn, Slow To Update, Smut, Suspense, Violence, Werewolf Kylo Ren, Werewolf Mates, Werewolf Turning, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:47:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 75,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24202300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bramadian0336/pseuds/Bramadian0336
Summary: It was just one spell, a ritual done under the full moon. Mara didn't even believe in magic. Soon she is being stalked, by dark creatures in the night that call to her. Even worse, she's beginning to suspect her new neighbor, Kylo, might somehow be involved. As she realizes her life could be in danger from the mysterious First Order, Mara discovers there are secrets in her past. She'll need to unearth them if she wants to stay alive. The supernatural and its hunters are coming for her.
Relationships: Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Original Female Character(s), Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/Original Female Character(s), Kylo Ren/Reader
Series: Midnight Call [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2129973
Comments: 88
Kudos: 374





	1. Chapter 1

Mara waits for the full moon to break through the tree line, letting it emerge into the clearing above her house before she heads outside. She feels a bit silly for what she’s about to do, but a promise is a promise. Her mother had been insistent, years ago, that she do this ritual on a full moon before her 25th birthday. Seeing as this is the last full moon before she turns twenty-five, she has waited long enough.

She carries the box of items down the steps of the back deck, walking across grass that is wet with dew. It’s late, and it would be pitch black this far from the city if not for the light of the moon. Mara had never believed in moon magic, spells, any of it. But her mother was something of a witch, and she can’t bring herself to break the last promise she’d made to her.

She drops a towel onto the grass before gently putting the old wooden box down. She can almost picture her mother’s hands opening it as she unclasps the closure, pushing back the top. The book inside is small and leather bound, and she has to use a flashlight to see the pages as she flips through. Her mother’s handwriting is clear, decorating every page.

Mara stops when she gets to the right one, scanning over the title at the top. “To find your place in the world,” she reads to herself, trying not to roll her eyes. She should take this seriously, but some part of her thinks it’s ridiculous. Especially since she’s foregoing getting enough sleep for work the next day.

She fumbles a bit lighting the candle, before filling the wide, shallow dish with water. Then she goes to work searching for the herbs listed out in the directions. Agrimony and witch grass, damiana and nettle. She’s grateful for her mother’s labelling, otherwise she’d be absolutely clueless what she is pulling out.

She follows the directions as carefully as possible, dropping a pinch of agrimony into the candle. Mara then uses the candle to light the small piece of white willow aflame, only to extinguish it in the water now soaked with the rest of the herbs. She shines the flashlight back down at the page in the spellbook, only to hesitate.

“You have got to be kidding me, Mom,” Mara groans to herself. The directions say to take off the necklace she’s worn since she was a child, a carved piece of labradorite that her mother insisted she keep around her neck at all times. But that isn’t the unbelievable part. No, it’s that she is supposed to take everything else off, and to say the spell naked under the moonlight.

She stares off into the dark woods at the edge of the lawn, reluctant and trying not to laugh at the awkwardness of the ritual. “It’s a good thing I didn’t move to the city, otherwise you might be getting me arrested tonight…” she muses.

The house her mother had left to her is fairly isolated, woods surrounding it on nearly all sides. The only other close property is the neighboring home, about a quarter mile down the road. She can see part of that house through the trees, the stream that winds through the woods pushing closer to the neighboring property than hers. But that house has been empty for over a year, and so she reasons there isn’t anyone to see the ridiculous display she’s about to put on.

Mara huffs with annoyance, standing to pull her clothes off quickly. She wants to get this over with, and drops them unceremoniously around her. She pulls the labradorite off last, gently dropping the stone into the water. She reads the words off the page as fast as she can stumble through them, holding the candle up to the moon while her cheap flashlight begins to flicker unreliably.

She looks up into the moonlight to say the last line, as instructed. “Show me my place in this world.”

She stares at the perfectly round orb in the sky a moment longer, as her words vanish to the sounds of the stream burbling somewhere within the trees. There are crickets chirping nearby, and an owl deeper into the woods hoots occasionally. But otherwise the world is silent around her, and nothing happens. Of course nothing happens, what had she been expecting?

She plucks the necklace back out of the water, fastening it damp around her neck once again. The stone comes to rest on her bare skin, and she is surprised that it feels nearly hot on her chest. But the sensation fades quickly, and she wonders if it is only her mind playing tricks on her.

Mara packs up the materials, hurrying back inside now that the strange little deed has been completed. She tucks the wooden spell box back into the closet where it’s been for the last two years, hoping wherever her mother is that she’d be satisfied with the kept promise. Then she drifts into her bedroom, cracking open the window to let in a cool breeze. If she falls asleep right away, she can still get a few hours of sleep before the alarm goes off in the morning.

But the longer she lays against the mattress, wishing for sleep, the harder it is to come by. It’s hot in her room, the weather warming up quickly with the coming summer season. She ends up opening the window wider, before kicking the sheets completely off her bare legs.

Her skin feels strange, like an itch somewhere beneath the surface. She rubs her arms, her discomfort growing, but finds she can’t relieve the crawling sensation. Stranger yet, she feels like her skin is burning beneath the labradorite stone. The necklace somehow feels heavier, weighing against her chest in a way she’s never noticed before.

It occurs to her that maybe she’s having some sort of reaction to the herbs used in the moon water. She takes the necklace off, wandering into the bathroom to splash cool water against her skin. When she returns to bed, she’s able to fall asleep.

**Hours Later**

Mara hears the sound as she’s trying to find her way in the dark. She’s shuffling forward hesitantly, blinking eyes that can’t make out any of her surroundings, when it meets her ears. It’s a whining growl, something hungry and desperate. Her mind is only half functioning, somewhere deliriously between being awake and asleep.

She puts her hands out, hoping they’ll bump into something. But there’s only the oppressive blackness, pushing against her eyes and skin. She moves forward with another small step when the growl rises, into a deep, animalistic cry.

Her heart starts pounding in her chest, hair raising at the roots, and it’s enough to push the daze of sleep back from her brain. Her thoughts structure themselves into something intelligent, as Mara tries to figure out where she is in her home.

She stumbles forward a larger step, fear making her mind race. The animal’s cry has died down, but she can hear something breathing there with her in the dark. Is it real, or is she still dreaming? It’s so loud, and it feels like it is right beside her.

Beginning to panic, she lurches forward rapidly, only to cry out when her leg connects painfully with something hard. She drops her hands down to find the shape of her dresser.

It takes her only moments to fumble her touch to the top of the furniture, finding the lamp there and clicking it on. Mara whirls around, heart still thudding as her mind tries to process the scary wake up. Her bedroom window is still open, the wind picking up outside enough to stir her hair. But she realizes the heavy breathing sound, like an animal panting, is gone. Had she only imagined it?

She stands there a few moments, her heart beat slowing to something more normal. Had she been sleepwalking? Mara’s certain she’s never done that before, and yet she’d come to walking in her bedroom. Worst yet, the sounds she’d heard had felt so real.

The longer she thinks about it, the more certain she is that she’d been dreaming. Her body had apparently acted out whatever she’d been experiencing while asleep.

Her eyes land on the alarm clock and Mara groans. It’s almost not worth it to go back to sleep. The sun will be up in a few minutes, and she’ll need to leave for work soon after. It’s a long drive into town, and she briefly considers calling off sick in favor of crawling back into bed.

But she chastises herself for the thought, as she hasn’t even been at the job for a year. She needs to make a good impression, and so she settles with shuffling into the kitchen. She rubs her gritty eyes while waiting for the coffee to brew.

**Much Later That Day**

Mara drains her travel mug as she gets closer to home, having lost count of how many cups of coffee she consumed during the work day. Her job wasn’t exactly the most thrilling use of her time, consisting of data entry and billing. But it was experience, and something to pay bills until she could try for something she might like more.

She turns onto her road, leaving behind the pavement in favor of the narrow gravel path that leads to her home. It’s bumpy, and makes it nearly impossible to keep her car clean for long. The dust her tires kick up seems to permanently coat the sedan. But she appreciates the home she’s inherited, enjoying being surrounded by nature and the peaceful seclusion the property provides.

When she’d been a child, she’d loved to play in the stream, or walk down to the nearby lake. Mara slows to turn into her driveway, the evening sun peeking through the tree cover to leave warm splashes across the ground. She applies the brakes, putting the car into park when she notices something orange through the trees.

She narrows her eyes, getting out of the car and heading up the driveway a bit further. Once she gets a better vantage point, she sees what looks to be a U-haul trailer through the trees, the kind people rent to move. It’s parked in the neighboring property’s driveway, and she has to crane her neck to try to make out the vehicle it’s attached to. It looks like a dark truck, though she can’t tell the model from so far away.

Mara stares, realizing she must be getting a new neighbor. She’s relatively sure the U-Haul or truck hadn’t been there that morning, but she was also barely paying attention as she left for work.

She has to talk herself out of getting into her car to drive passed their house to scope them out. Their road dead ends at the lake, and it would look creepy for her to double past their home as they are attempting to move in. She contents herself with heading inside, ready to make dinner and pass out early for the night.

But she is stopped before she can get to the front door, when something draws her attention near her bedroom window. She abandons her path, instead winding through the rocks and grass towards the siding of her house. When she’s close enough to recognize it, her eyes widen.

There, stuck in the frame of her window, is a tuft of fur. It’s all black, a few inches long and coarse looking. She reaches out before hesitating, her fingers hovering near it uncertainly as the memory of the previous night’s dream returns to her. She’d thought she’d heard an animal breathing in the room beside her, until she’d fully returned to consciousness.

As she finally lets her finger and thumb grasp the fur, pulling it free to examine it, she feels goosebumps erupt across her skin. What if it hadn’t been a dream?

**That Night**

Mara leaves the hall light on when she crawls into bed, in case she has another sleepwalking episode like the prior night. She also leaves the bedroom window closed and securely latched, uneasy regarding the fur she’d found snagged on the exterior of the screen. She’d convinced herself it could have been anything, a raccoon or stray dog perhaps.

She lays down hesitantly. Exhaustion weighs heavily on her mind, but is held back by anxiety over the thought of sleepwalking again. It’s too warm in her room, but she refuses to open the window. Instead she lays without covering up, a short, black satin nightgown the only thing on her skin. Even that feels excessive. Her skin is itching again, some sort of sensation like it is too tight on her body to be comfortable.

Mara tosses and turns, before forcing herself to slow her breathing and try to relax into a slumber. Her hand comes to the labradorite necklace around her neck, running her fingers slowly over the smooth stone. It’s something she’s done since she was small to calm herself, and it works. She falls asleep, until the howl pierces the night.

Her eyes snap open, and she realizes she is standing again. But something is wrong, her feet feel cool and damp. Absolute blackness crushes her pupils as her eyes struggle to adjust and see.

Mara takes a step forward, only to feel the odd sensation of something crunching underfoot. Another step, and her toes sink into something wet and gritty, and she recognizes the texture. Where she’s standing is muddy, dead leaves giving way to messy earth. She’s outside. The air is cool against her overheated skin, and somewhere she hears a lone cricket grinding out its chirps, confirming that she is no longer in her bedroom.

Her pulse starts to race with alarm, hands trembling at her sides. How did she manage this? How far is she from her home?

Mara blinks desperately, relieved when her eyes begin to make out vague shapes in the darkness. The moon might be waning now, but it’s still nearly full. It gives enough light for her to gradually make out the trees around her, and she heads in the direction that seems slightly less dark. She can hear the stream, a reassuring sign that she isn’t too far from her house.

Though she moves slowly, her heart pounding against her rib cage, she still manages to trip. She cries out in surprise when her foot snags the rough bark of a fallen branch, catching herself on her hands as she tumbles. One of her palms lands in water, impacting one of the smooth, flat stones that line the stream. It stings a bit, and she winces.

But Mara realizes she can follow the stream back towards her property. Relief takes the edge off her panic, though she still feels bewildered at waking up outside. At least she hadn’t wandered off too far into the woods, or she’d be in an even worse situation. She feels out each step with her foot before continuing along, using the edge of the shallow water as a guide.

She’s going to have to do something about this new sleepwalking problem, however. She wonders if she should see a doctor, if maybe there is some sort of medication that can treat it. Or will she need to resort to barricading herself into her home every night?

The mental image of herself piling furniture in front of the doors makes her laugh nervously, her giggles mingling with the flowing water. But the laughter barely conceals her anxiety, rising at the notion that she can’t trust herself to sleep anymore.

Why is this happening all of a sudden? Could it be related to the spell she’d done for her mother, some sort of weird side effect?

The farther along she gets, the more she can see lights ahead. Through the trees, she makes out the glowing windows of a house in the night. She recognizes the silhouette, even from this angle, as her neighbor’s home.

Mara picks up her speed now that she can see more of the ground, hoping to get back to her home quickly. She’s nearly cleared the last of the trees, grass replacing cool dirt underfoot, when she freezes at the bright flash of light levelled directly into her face.

“Whose there?”

She raises her hand to shield her eyes from the harsh flashlight, her heart that had just calmed beginning to race again with nerves. She can’t see the person shining the light at her, but the voice had been distinctly deep. The dark figure beyond the glare looks tall, and definitely masculine.

“I’m… I’m sorry,” she stumbles out an apology, unsure how to explain the bizarre circumstances. “I think I’m your neighbor?”

The light lowers mercifully, as he shines it at the ground between them instead. Bright spots dance in her vision as she tries to make out more of him. He doesn’t say anything, and she shifts awkwardly on her bare feet.

“You just moved in, right? I live right over there,” she tries again, gesturing to her house. It’s so close, yet well on the other side of this awkward interaction.

“It’s two in the morning. What are you doing out here?” he questions. His voice sounds less stern, something like curiosity creeping into its depths.

She can make out more of him now as her vision clears. He’s as tall as she’d first assumed, with long hair that seems black in the night. If she had to guess, she would assume his face is attractive, though she’d need more light to confirm. His shoulders appear impossibly broad beneath the dark flannel he’s wearing, and her eyes dance down to see his pale skin, exposed under the shirt he’s failed to button up.

Mara shifts, averting her eyes before they can linger even more stubbornly on her new neighbor. “I um…I think I was sleepwalking?” she says hesitantly, huffing a slight laugh nervously. “I swear I’m not crazy, this probably looks crazy-”

“Were you wandering around in the woods in _that?_ ” he asks.

She looks back, and sees the way his dark eyes drop to her figure. She gulps, biting her lip as she grows embarrassed. The nightgown is short and clingy, barely covering her. She fights the urge to cross her arms over her chest, forcing herself to stand her ground under his searching gaze. When his eyes return to hers, she sees the dark lines of his eyebrows quirk upwards. It’s too dark to tell, but she thinks he might be smirking.

“What did the trees do to deserve that number?” he teases, before shifting his focus away from her body, running a hand through his wavy hair.

“Like I said, I think I was sleepwalking…” she mutters defensively, before looking passed him towards his house. The back doors are opened wide and propped that way, held by a cardboard box on each side. “What are you doing out here so late?” she retorts curiously.

“I have to get that trailer back to the rental place in the morning,” he explains. “I’m still unloading it.”

She looks down, just now able to see the state her feet are in. They’re caked in dirt, the sight making her cringe as she realizes she’ll need to shower before going anywhere near her bed again. Mara considers that the neighborly thing to do would be to offer to help him move his things, but the thought nearly makes her start laughing. She’s not in the right state, of mind or dress, to be helping a strange man move his things in the middle of the night.

“Um… I guess I’ll let you get back to that, then. Sorry for the…well the interruption,” she stammers out, trying her best to not let her gaze return to the toned expanse of muscle that she can barely make out above his jeans. She starts for her house, skirting around him in her haste.

“I’ll walk you back to your door,” he offers, the flashlight shifting to illuminate the ground ahead of them.

They walk in silence for only a few moments before she can’t stand it, already regretting the first impression she’s made. He probably thinks she’s an absolute nut now. “So when did you get to town?” she ventures in an attempt to fill the silence.

“Last night,” he replies. She furrows her eyebrows as she considers that. She hadn’t noticed any vehicles the night before. She hopes he hadn’t been around to witness her naked adventure under the full moon, the thought enough to bring a renewed blush to her skin.

They are close enough to her home now to see her front door, and it is standing agape. She’d apparently left it hanging open as she stumbled out asleep into the world, a sight that makes her worry her lip. “You’re going to want to be more careful,” he warns.

“What do you mean?” Mara asks stupidly, before feeling the urge to smack herself. Doubtless, he’s referring to the sleepwalking. It could be dangerous, but she doesn’t need him to tell her that.

But he surprises her when he answers. “There’s a lot of wild animals out here. I thought I heard howling.”

She stops suddenly, turning to look at him in alarm as her memory returns to her. The sound that had woken her from her dreams, to find herself standing in the beginning of the forest. She’d heard the howling too, hadn’t she?

His eyes are fixated on hers, expression unreadable. She can see enough of him now, between the lights and the moon, to realize he is indeed handsome. His features are striking, a prominent nose and intense eyes offset by lips that are surprisingly gentle looking.

Mara licks her own lips nervously. “Um. There’s coyotes around here, occasionally,” she offers. “But I don’t think they’re very dangerous to humans…”

He only shrugs, stopping near her a few feet from her door. Her hands are sweaty with nerves, something about his presence making her feel intimidated. “Well. Goodnight,” she says uncertainly, stepping towards her door.

“Wait.”

She stops at his command, looking back questioningly. His lips curve slowly into a smile, sending her stomach dancing in response. “Don’t I get to know your name?” he asks.

She's taken aback by his tone, the flirtatious quality of his voice unmistakable. “Mara,” she offers quietly, giving him a small smile. He holds his hand out, and she takes it, noting the way her hand nearly disappears in his. A sensation races up her arm from his touch, renewing that crawling feeling in her flesh that she’s been experiencing lately.

The handshake is over quickly, he releases her fingers after the smallest gentle shake. “Is that short for something?” he questions.

She raises her eyebrows at him. No one has ever guessed that her name was a nickname before. “Yes,” she admits. “Amaris. And your name is?”

“Kylo,” he replies. “It’s nice to meet you.”

She nods, watching him retreat before he pauses to give her one last glance. “And remember what I said. Be careful, you never know what’s out there.”

His words send a jolt of electricity down her spine, and she watches him disappear back across the yard towards his own house. When she goes inside, she makes sure to lock the front door before heading for the bathroom. She turns the shower on, stripping the nightgown off as the water heats. When she steps in, she watches the dirty water swirl down the drain, absentmindedly playing with her necklace.

She’s lost in thought, considering searching sleepwalking on her phone to see if there is anything on the internet that could help her. Mara even considers consulting her mother’s spell book, curious if her symptoms could be caused by any of the herbs.

But she’s torn from her thinking by the dreadful sound that pierces the darkness outside. It’s a howl, a deep, aggressive call that makes her blood feel like ice despite the hot water running over her skin. Goosebumps cover her flesh, as she stands frozen in fear beneath the shower head.

Instead of picturing a coyote, or a dog, or even some misplaced wolf, her mind runs to her neighbor. Kylo’s dark eyes and dark hair, his pale chest underneath that flannel shirt, fills her thoughts. Her breath comes quicker as the howling grows louder. _You never know what’s out there…_


	2. Chapter 2

Mara doesn’t have any more sleepwalking episodes for the next few days, to her immense relief. She still shoves her couch in front of the front door every night, hoping if she does attempt to wander out again that the physical barrier will stop her. But it is unnecessary, as her sleeping almost returns to normal.

There is still some animal that wakes her every night like clockwork, howling outside in the woods before abandoning its attempts. She can only assume it’s a lone coyote, which is strange. They are usually more of a pack animal, and its been years since she’s heard any this close to the property. She tries to not let it scare her, though. There are bound to be odd animal noises when living so close to the forest.

Her birthday approaches rapidly, landing on a weekend. She wakes up that Saturday morning excited for the plans she’s made to celebrate with her friends from college. Mara takes her time getting out of bed before making coffee, deciding to tidy up the house before getting ready to drive into the city. She’s in a ridiculously good mood as she washes the few dishes that were laying around.

She’s about to take the kitchen trash out when her phone rings. She searches for it a moment before grabbing it off the counter to see that it’s her closest friend, Erica. “Hello!?”

“Hey! Just checking, are we still meeting early to catch a movie before dinner and drinks with the girls?” Erica asks.

“Sure! Just text me which theater you want to go to,” she replies, attempting to hold the phone with her shoulder so she can tie off the trash bag.

“Well that depends on what movie you’d like to see! You should pick, since it’s your birthday,” Erica points out.

“You know me, I’m not picky. You can choose,” Mara insists. “I’m just happy to be seeing everyone! It’s been a while since we’ve all hung out.”

“It’s been too long,” Erica agrees. “It should be fun! I’ll text the address of whichever theater I decide.”

“Sounds good! See you then!”

They say their goodbyes, and Mara scrounges around her entryway closet until she finds shoes to shove on her feet. She heaves the trash bag up once again, shoving the front door open. She only makes it one step out before recoiling at the sight on the stoop.

The trash bag hits the ground with a thump a moment before the shrill scream leaves her mouth. She stares in horror only long enough to comprehend what she’s seeing before tearing her gaze away. There is part of a small deer laying there on the cement, blood pooling beneath where its lower half is missing.

Bile rises up Mara’s throat, sour and acidic. She gags, retreating backwards across her lawn in horror. She shoves a fist over her mouth, attempting to choke down the threat of being sick, before bumping into something solid behind her. A second, shorter scream leaves her when she feels someone grab her shoulder.

She spins, attempting to pull free from the contact. But she stops, gaping instead at the sudden appearance of her neighbor. “What the fuck!?” she gasps.

Kylo ignores her outburst, not even looking at her. His eyes are locked behind her, on the deer carcass at her doorstep. “I heard screaming,” he says finally.

She realizes he is breathing a bit heavier than usual, as if he’d ran over. “I’m sorry…” she mutters, not even sure what she is apologizing for. She hadn’t meant to swear at him, especially if he’d rushed over thinking she might be in danger. Her throat burns from the stomach acid, and she refuses to look back at the dead animal, not wanting to be sick in front of him. “I just opened my door, and…” she trails off.

“Someone left you a present,” Kylo observes, voice low. The tone of his voice catches her attention, and she examines his face closer. She doesn’t know him well enough to tell, but his expression almost strikes her as angry.

“Someone?” she repeats his choice of words doubtfully. “What could do that? A bear?”

“Sure,” Kylo agrees dismissively. But Mara notices his eyes are scanning the trees beyond her house, narrowed. She’s confused at his mood, and the scowl on his features combined with his large build ends up intimidating her. She edges back from him, making the mistake of looking once again at the deer.

She groans, turning away from the sight. “Why did it leave it at my door? That can’t be normal,” she complains, throat working to swallow down the nauseated spit pooling in her mouth.

“Well, it’s not exactly a civil way to say hello,” Kylo remarks sarcastically.

She looks down at his feet to avoid meeting his gaze, and notices his boots are untied like he’d shoved them on in a hurry. “I’m sorry if I startled you, I didn’t mean to scream. I just wasn’t expecting to open my door to see that,” Mara rambles awkwardly, gesturing back at the sight. “Ugh, I think I might actually puke,” she mutters, grimacing.

“Do you have any big trash bags?” he asks.

“Trash bags?” she repeats.

Kylo raises his eyebrows. “Unless you want to leave it there…” he explains slowly.

Mara winces at her own stupidity. “Oh, yes, um… Hold on, I’ll get them…”

She steps around the mess awkwardly, not looking at the poor animal. She feels bad for it, but can’t bring herself to look at its face. She grabs the trash bags from under the kitchen sink before hesitating and grabbing the unused box of plastic gloves as well. When she steps back outside, her neighbor is examining the deer.

He holds his hand out for the bags, and she passes them and the gloves to him awkwardly. “I’ll take care of it. You don’t have to watch,” he offers.

She nearly sighs in relief but holds it back, feeling horrendous about the situation. This is only their second meeting, and it’s proving to be even more bizarre than the first. “Thank you. You really don’t have to, if you don’t want to-” she tries to assure him.

“Go on inside,” Kylo cuts her off. “See if you can find bleach or something, for the blood stain.”

She nods, retreating to her kitchen and searching once again under the sink. She comes up with a cleaner that claims to work on blood stains according to the label she reads after pulling it out. She’s startled slightly when Kylo appears in the doorway as she turns to head back out.

“Sorry,” he says, giving her an apologetic look. “I wanted to wash my hands. I can’t stand how rubber gloves smell, reminds me of the dentist.”

She laughs slightly. “Of course, go ahead. Thank you so much, for doing that…” She trails off awkwardly, watching him wash up in her kitchen sink. His black t-shirt hugs his arms, and she can’t help but notice the muscles stretching the fabric there.

Mara looks away, feeling incredibly uncomfortable. Not only does she find him attractive, but her experiences lately have made her feel foolish every time they interact. They barely know each other, and her only impressions on him have been sleepwalking and nearly vomiting at a torn apart animal at her door. She could groan at her bad luck.

“You know what the funny thing is?” she asks randomly, hoping to ease her own tension. “You called it a present, and it actually is my birthday. Kind of an awful start to it, huh?”

Kylo drops the hand towel and leans back onto her counter, watching her fiddle with the nozzle of the spray cleaner. The seconds stretch on before he replies. “Sounds like you might be in for a weird birthday.”

She gives him a tentative smile. “Yeah, I guess so. Hopefully it gets better later on.”

She meets his eyes, which she notices for the first time are a warm brown shade. She finds them appealing, even as she has a hard time holding them. Kylo looks intrigued, asking curiously, “Oh? Do you have plans?”

“I’m going out with some friends from college. We don’t get to see each other much lately, so it should be a good night,” Mara explains, feeling some of her earlier happiness return to her. It’s nowhere near as elated as before the gruesome discovery, but she’s still hopeful the day might turn around.

But Kylo’s body language seems to tense up at her response. When she darts her eyes back to his, he looks concerned. “You sure that’s a good idea?”

She frowns. “…Why wouldn’t it be?” she asks. “Am I supposed to cancel all my plans for the day because some wild animal decided to leave half its dinner behind?”

He shrugs, straightening. “Sorry,” he says. “I just mean, it seems like a bad sign to me.”

Her frown only grows when she wants to disagree, but finds herself unable to. He isn’t wrong, but she had never been one to be overly superstitious. “Well, let's hope the bear doesn’t come back to snack on me next,” Mara tries to joke, grinning.

Kylo’s mood seems to shift at her attempt at lightening the conversation, a slow smile growing on his face. “I could hardly blame the bear if he did,” he retorts.

Her heart races at his obvious flirting, and she instantly wishes she weren’t currently wearing sweatpants with her hair in a messy bun. She stutters over a reply, failing to come up with something witty. She ends up laughing nervously instead. “Oh, right, well, I bet bears get rather hungry,” she says quickly before cringing. Her cheeks grow hot with embarrassment.

Kylo only smirks at her, and she wishes that her kitchen floor could split open to swallow her whole. “I should head back,” he admits. “I hope you enjoy your night out.”

She nods, following him out of the kitchen and back towards her front door. “Thank you again,” she says, holding the door when he opens it to exit.

“No problem,” Kylo assures her, pausing before he steps out. Her breath catches when he looks down at her, their bodies close enough that she can smell something like masculine soap or cologne on him. “Happy birthday,” he says, grinning. 

She smiles back, her hands nearly trembling at his proximity. “Thanks,” she says quietly. He hesitates only a second longer, eyes searching hers before he tears them away to leave her standing in her doorway. She watches him go, waiting until he reaches the trees between their houses before rolling her eyes at herself with irritation.

“I bet bears get rather hungry,” she mutters. “Are you fucking kidding me with that…”

Mara sprays the cleaner on the blood stain on the cement, wrinkling her nose up with disgust at the way it bubbles. She’ll probably need to let it soak before spraying it off with a hose. “I bet bears get hungry, who says that,” she continues chiding herself. “You get a guy who wants to flirt and that’s what you come up with?”

She’s still berating herself as she goes back inside to shower and get ready for her night out. Mara picks out a simple black dress, and spends more time on her hair and makeup than she normally would. She ends up nearly running late, draining a second cup of coffee as she shoves her phone and wallet into a small purse. Then she runs out to her car, noticing Kylo’s truck is gone as she backs out of her driveway. She’s got a long drive into the city, but her excitement finally returns at the prospect of seeing her friends.

**That Night**

“That is disgusting!” Erica shrieks in response to Mara’s story about her morning with the deer. She waited until after dinner and a round of drinks to tell the small group what happened, not wanting to gross herself or anyone else out before eating.

“I’m so glad Kylo cleaned it up,” Mara admits, taking a sip of her cocktail. She’s still on her first, while Erica has already nearly drained her second.

“Kylo?” Nicole pipes up curiously. “Is that the hot neighbor?”

Mara nods. “Yeah, that’s him.”

“What would even do that? It has to be a big predator, right?” Erica asks.

Mara shrugs. “I was thinking a bear, maybe? Or a pack of coyotes, I guess. But I only ever hear one.”

Nicole’s eyes widen comically across the small table, as she tucks a strand of her brown locks behind her ear. “You hear coyotes out there? I don’t know how you stay in that house alone, I’d be so creeped out!”

“It’s not usually creepy,” Mara disagrees.

“You should move closer to the city,” Erica advises. “We’d be able to visit more often!”

Mara grins to humor her friend, but the thought of leaving the house she grew up in is unpleasant. She loves that house, and the memories it holds. Some days she feels like it is the only thing connecting her to her mother, wherever she is.

“Where’s Kaitlyn!?” Nicole pipes up curiously, surveying the crowd around them. They’re at a table along the periphery of the room. The bulk of the large space is filled with people dancing, the strobing lights roving over their bodies in a rainbow of colors.

“She’s out there somewhere, I just saw her a second ago,” Erica reassures. She grabs Mara’s hand, towing her upwards. “We should join her!”

Mara groans, but doesn’t bother resisting. Erica loves dancing, and no amount of protesting had ever dissuaded her. They wind through the bodies, the music growing louder as they leave the bar behind and get closer to the speakers. She does her best to dance with Erica, even as she feels self-conscious. She lacks Erica’s confidence, her bold movements to the music. She has this way of shaking her curls, swaying her hips, that looks stunning. Mara feels clumsy in comparison, rolling her eyes at her friend. Erica only laughs and pulls her along, closer to the source of the beat.

Mara winces, as the music sounds too loud. Her eardrums feel like they are bouncing around in her head, and she’s suddenly aware of the cloying excess of smells. So many scents blur together from the mass of people, perfumes and colognes mingling in a cloud that assaults her nostrils.

She needs to get more air, feeling overwhelmed suddenly. “I’m going to get another drink!” Mara nearly shouts to Erica to be heard. Her friend just bobs her head in acknowledgement, and so she begins the trek back out of the throng of dancers.

She’s nearly made it to the side of the room again when the guy bumps into her. At first, Mara thinks it’s accidental. She begins to apologize, moving away, before his hands grab onto her hips rough enough to bruise. She tries to pull away, craning to see whose holding onto her, only to cringe when he grinds against her ass.

“Let go, I don’t want to dance!” she protests, trying to wiggle away. His arm locks uncomfortably around her stomach, keeping her pressed to him.

“You smell so good,” he pants into her hair. She recoils from the stench of his breath, throwing an elbow back into his body to no avail.

Mara’s beginning to panic, wondering if she should fully start punching at the man, when the growl meets her ears. She first thinks it is coming from him, but then she realizes he has frozen, his roaming fingers paused at the sound. It’s loud, somehow reverberating in her ears despite the music of the club. Her chest rumbles with the vibration of it, at the same time the guy drops his hold of her completely.

“I didn’t know,” he snaps out. She pulls from him, turning to see as he is retreating from her. She doesn’t catch his face, but his hair is dark blonde, hanging long and limp on his shoulders. He disappears into the crowd, as the growling finally stops.

Mara has the strange sensation that she’s being watched, her hair prickling uncomfortably as goosebumps rise on her skin. She spins back around, searching, until her eyes land on him. Her lips part in surprise at the sight of Kylo, standing on the far side of the room. He’s immediately recognizable, taller than most of the people around him, his face openly furious as lights dance across his dark features.

Mara starts towards him, but has to look away momentarily when she bumps into a group of girls that are swaying erratically. Their drunken giggles annoy her as she shoves past, intent on reaching him. But when she looks up again, he is gone. She continues to the spot she had last seen him, searching the crowd for his dark hair. But there’s no sign of him.

**Later**

“Are you sure it was Kylo?” Nicole asks as they make their way towards their cars. “It was dark in there.”

“It was definitely him,” Mara insists. “I know it was.”

“You should have asked him to dance,” Erica contributes, giggling. “I would’ve danced with him, if he’s as hot as you say.”

Erica stumbles a bit before stopping, using Kaitlyn’s shoulder to lean on. The group waits while she pulls her heels off, holding them dangling from one hand instead as they continue on. She’s probably had a bit too much to drink, if Mara had to guess. Erica might be the most entertaining of the group, but she could also be the most irresponsible.

“You don’t think it’s weird that he was there?” Mara asks no one in particular.

Nicole makes a noise of sympathy. “I mean, it’s a little strange. But it really could be a coincidence.”

Mara huffs but doesn’t answer. She’s had a feeling in the pit of her stomach since seeing him, since the random guy grabbed at her on the dance floor. Something seems wrong, and remembering the feeling of that growl in her ears only makes the goosebumps return to her flesh.

Mara heard that growl before, the first time she had woken up from sleepwalking. She doesn’t dare tell her friends that part, though, shying away from including a detail that might sound unbelievable.

“The next time you see him, just ask why he didn’t say hello. Maybe he didn’t even recognize you or something,” Nicole suggests sensibly.

“The next time you see him, ask if he wants to blow your back out. Maybe he could loosen you up,” Erica adds on, laughing.

“Erica!” Kaitlyn hisses. But Mara only rolls her eyes at her friend’s antics.

“Thanks, Erica. You know, you should write greeting cards. You’ve got a way with words,” she quips.

“’Welcome to the neighborhood, please blow my back out. Love, Mara’,” Nicole says. They end up laughing stupidly as they approach the parking lot.

“Whose driving drunky home?” Mara asks, nodding at Erica.

“I’ve got her. Get home safe,” Kaitlyn insists. “And happy birthday!”

Nicole gives her a hug, as Erica takes off at a trot through the lot to find Kaitlyn’s car. “Happy birthday, Mara. And maybe consider the whole moving closer thing. It probably wouldn’t be a bad idea?” she asks uncertainly. Mara nods, giving her a small smile.

“Sure,” she agrees. “Thanks for coming out tonight. Drive safe.” Nicole smiles back, giving a wave as they part ways. Mara buckles up when she gets into her car, turning the radio on to accompany the long drive home in the dark.

The drive seems shorter than normal, as she ends up getting lost in her thoughts. What, or who, had been making that growling sound? She knows now it had never been a dream. She’d heard it twice now, and the man who had grabbed her seemed to hear it too. He had said he didn’t know something. What didn’t he know? What was he talking about?

Mara turns her brights on as she gets further into the woods, turning onto her street to the racket of gravel under her tires. Something strange is happening, she can’t try to deny it any longer. And deep in the pit of her stomach, she partially blames the spell she had done. But why would her mother insist she do a spell that brings some sort of bad luck? What was the meaning of the ritual, anyway?

Maybe she should try looking into the materials she had used. Perhaps they could give her a clue. She pulls into her driveway, putting the car into park. She get out and shuts the door harder than necessary, feeling rushed to get into the house and out of the dark. She feels creeped out, the sensation that eyes are on her returning. Her skin feels like it is crawling again, a deep itch that roves her body.

Mara nearly runs to the front door, only pausing to look when she’s unlocked it, the knob in her hand. She turns it, as her eyes search the tree line passed her house. She wants to reassure herself that it is only her imagination acting up. For a moment, she spots nothing and breathes a little easier.

But then her mouth drops open when she sees the eyes, staring at her from the darkness at the beginning of the woods. They are reflective, some sort of animal that is lurking just beyond the edge of her lawn. She watches as they blink once, adrenaline flooding her blood stream.

It shifts, and she can see something darker than the surroundings there, a shape amongst the trees. Her breath leaves her lungs in a horrified gasp at the size of it. It’s absolutely massive, whatever it is. Mara pushes the door open to her house, tears stinging at her vision as she refuses to blink. Has she gone insane? Is that a bear? It has to be, the size of it alone-

The eyes change as she watches. They grow red, glowing, piercing into her from the night. She’s never seen anything with eyes like that, bright red and burning like some sort of demon.

Mara throws herself into her house, slamming the door shut and turning the lock with shaking hands. She backs away from it, wishing she had something more to secure it. She doesn’t bother turning a light on, her gaze stuck in terror on that entirely too small, too weak looking front door. It’s the only thing between her and whatever lurks outside, and she doesn’t want to think about what lurks outside, the red eyes burning into her brain-

Mara freezes, stopping her steps backwards. Her breathing is shaky, loud in the silent house. But something tells her to try to calm it, to listen beyond her own gasps.

A wet, panting sound meets her ears immediately.


	3. Chapter 3

Mara’s mouth hangs open as she tries to pull air into her lungs, but they feel like they have deflated in her chest. Her hand searches the wall, dragging over the texture of the paint as she desperately fumbles for the light switch. Her feet are stuck to the floor, jolting sensations shooting up her spine like electric currents. She feels stalled, frozen in terror.

The panting sound grows louder, and she wants to run from it. But she can’t go outside, can she? She’d seen something terrible out there. And yet she knows that something just as bad is in here with her, leaving her nowhere to flee.

Mara can smell something in the air, a fetid stench like rotting meat. When her fingers find the switch, she holds back a sob as she flips it. Light floods the space. Her eyes roam the living room, nothing meeting them at first. Just for a moment, she can catch her breath.

A shifting of movement in the kitchen catches her attention, revealing the location of whatever has invaded her home. She turns, her eyes burning as tears rapidly fill them and overflow. It shows itself, stepping into the doorway from where it had been concealed behind the wall. It doesn’t just step into the doorway, it _fills_ the doorway, and if she’d had enough air in her lungs she would have screamed.

But she can’t breathe, as the burning red eyes meet hers. It’s a demonic version of a wolf, she recognizes that much resemblance. But it looks twisted and sickly, its gray fur is matted and filthy. It is standing on its rear legs as it stares at her, panting that stomach wrenching stench out of its gaping mouth.

Mara knows she needs to move, to run for her life. But the part of her that is prey, that small instinct in the base of her brain, tells her not to. The moment she moves, the predator will chase. She’s locked in place like a deer in the headlights.

The beast drops suddenly, letting its front legs slam into the floor, shuddering it with the weight of impact. It rips those otherworldly red eyes from her, throwing its head back. The sound that comes from its throat is enough to break her from her paralysis, a screaming howl.

Mara darts forward, fingers scrabbling at the lock to fling the door open. It reacts immediately, she can hear its claws tearing at the floor as it fights for purchase to throw itself at her. She’s only a few steps out of the door when she hears it slam into a wall behind her in its haste to pursue.

She screams, running as fast as she can blindly, too panicked to even look where she is going. But it doesn’t seem to matter, as the demented wolf is faster. Barely a dozen steps across the lawn and it catches her, she can smell the sick wave of its breath at the same time the growl vibrates her ears.

Then she’s screaming again, but this time in pain. It catches her lower leg, its claws snag at her skin and tear her flesh. Unbalanced, she tumbles onto the ground, immediately spinning herself to see it. She scrambles backwards, sliding on the wet grass in a futile attempt to escape. It edges nearer, looming above her. Wrecked sobs tear free from her chest as she realizes she is not going to make it. 

This close she can see the brutal fangs in its mouth, and it bares them at her as it snarls. A trail of slobber dangles from its jaw, foamed with its rapid breath.

Mara cries out as something slams into the creature from the side. The forceful collision throws the hideous wolf from her before it can attack, sending it tumbling across the ground. Her eyes focus briefly on the gray beast that rights itself, quickly recovering, before darting back to the new shape. It has stopped in front of her, and it is even larger.

It’s another wolf, with jet black fur. Though less distorted looking than the first, it is too freakishly massive to be anything natural. It turns its back to her as it snarls sharply, pacing on huge paws. She crawls backwards across the ground, taking any chance she can to increase her distance from the nightmare before her.

The gray wolf’s eyes dart to Mara, before the black wolf moves to block it from view. Her mouth drops open as the snarl drops into a rumbling growl, her chest shuddering unpleasantly from the deepness of the sound. She gasps as this new wolf throws itself into the first creature, the sound of snapping teeth filling the air as they fight.

Mara doesn’t bother watching for more than a second, enough to see them fall together in a tangled mass of fur. She lurches to her feet, grasping onto the opportunity while they are distracted and running as fast as she can _away_.

It doesn’t matter where away is. Her mind is careening a thousand different directions, trying to come up with a way to survive. But her thoughts are too chaotic to be functional. Can she lock herself in her home? Could those things break down the door?

She’s already ran too far from her house anyway, her blood rushing to her racing heartbeat, slamming away almost painfully in her chest. Her feet pound into the ground as she pushes forward desperately. She thinks of her car, but it doesn’t matter as she can’t remember where her keys had ended up.

Mara hears one of the monstrous animals scream and she stumbles, daring to look back. She can’t see them anymore, her yard empty, her front door a yellow rectangle of light illuminating nothing. A second scream meets her ears, before it is cut off. Silence replaces it, ticking by for several tense seconds, before a howl rises from somewhere in the woods.

She takes off again, stumbling through the trees onto Kylo’s driveway. The big black truck is parked there, and a glimmer of hope fills her chest. He’s her only neighbor for miles, but maybe he can help. She’s gasping for breath as she runs for his porch, the lantern left on next to the door. She pounds up the few wooden steps only to stagger to a stop.

Kylo’s front door is ajar by a few inches, and she can only stare at it as her stomach lurches with sudden nausea. Her body is shaking spastically, overwhelmed by the flood of chemicals triggered by panic. Mara reaches out a trembling hand, planting her fingertips against the wood near the knob and pushing. The door creaks slightly as it swings wider, showing that Kylo’s house is dark inside as if no one is home.

“Kylo?” she asks the darkness, her voice weak with tremors. Mind racing, she remembers with horror when this nightmare had begun.

It all started on the night he arrived.

Realization battles with disbelief at the conclusion her mind draws. It couldn’t be…could it?

But she doesn’t have time to debate it, freezing as one of the porch steps groans behind her, sounding burdened by a large weight. Something whimpers behind her, a noise that is deceptively soft.

She turns slowly, willing the wolf to disappear by the time she can face it. Her eyes are stinging, the tears long since making her mascara run into them to burn. Mara’s sob catches in her throat as her eyes land on the black wolf, one of its massive paws on the first step of the porch. It’s blocking her in, her only route of escape now is to flee into the house.

But it doesn’t snarl at her like the other had. It is watching her, intelligent brown eyes focused on her face as it cocks its impossibly large head to the side. Mara tries to step back again, running into the door that is still partially closed. Her fingers search it meaninglessly, digging against the wood.

A throaty whine leaves it, and she gasps in surprise as she realizes the wolf is drenched in blood. Its muzzle, throat, and chest are saturated with the crimson liquid, dripping from its fur to leave fat splatters on the porch beneath it.

It climbs another step, that needy whine continuing to trail from it as it watches her. She shrinks in the doorway, picturing how her head would fit quite neatly into its jaws. It is taller than her, an overgrown mimic of a wolf like something pulled from mankind’s ancient nightmare.

“Please,” Mara gasps, voice pleading into the space between them. Its warm breath hits her, and though it is not the putrid scent of the first creature, she can smell blood. Sweet and metallic, making something twist in the base of her spine, a deep-seated shiver.

The brown eyes change, glowing brighter until they are a bright red, piercing into hers. She can’t tear her gaze away, that something in her spine spasming again. Buried beneath the fear and shock, something in her wakes up at the smell of blood and the red eyes before her.

The wolf moves again, as if to come closer, breaking her from the moment so that logic can flood back into her brain. “Please don’t,” she chokes out pathetically, tearing her eyes away to search for a way to flee that isn’t further into Kylo’s home.

To her astonishment, it seems to listen. It shakes its head roughly, sending blood splattering as its eyes dim to a regular brown. Mara watches it retreat, backing its intimidating form down from the porch steps. It turns from her, breaking into a loping run towards the back of Kylo’s property until she loses sight of it.

For a moment she stands there stupidly, before forcing herself to retreat quickly. The forest around her is eerily quiet now as she runs to her own house. It’s like the animals have all been silenced, not even a cricket chirping. The night is still other than her rapid breathing, and she’s shocked to even be alive.

Why had it let her go? What did it want, if not to tear into her flesh, like the poor deer at her doorstep?

Mara locks the door as soon as she gets inside, before running through her home erratically, checking the windows. They are all closed and locked, except for the kitchen one. It is open just a crack, and she doesn’t remember leaving it that way.

Is that how that thing had gotten inside? But how could it have fit through the window? And why or _how_ could it have shut the window back to nearly closed behind itself?

Mara slams the window down, fixing the latch, trembling as she realizes it doesn’t matter. She knows she isn’t safe, those things are still out there. Or was one of them dead?

She remembers the blood soaking the fur of the black wolf, before shaking her head spastically. She doesn’t know what to do, she can’t think straight. She spots her keys, laying on the floor near the front door. Mara grabs them up, picturing herself jumping into her car to drive away in the night and never return. But she hesitates at the thought of going back outside for long enough to even get to her vehicle.

She starts pacing, her breathing coming too fast. Mara realizes she might be hyperventilating, but can’t bring herself to calm down. Her leg gives a throb and she looks down, spotting three scratches curving around her calf.

They are deep enough that blood has trailed from them in rivulets down her skin. Her shoes are ruined, torn up and covered in mud. Should she call the police?

Mara grabs her purse up from where she’d dropped it, phone in hand before she second guesses herself. What will she say? She can’t tell them the truth. They would never believe her. She lets herself drop heavily onto the floor, scooting back until her back hits the wall so she can keep her field of vision on the door and windows around her. Panic lingers as she runs her hands through her wild hair, half tempted to tear at it in frustration.

Finally, she unlocks the phone, dialing the sheriff’s office from her contact list rather than 911. She’s never called the police before, and she immediately regrets it when the operator picks up. She barely registers the woman’s voice, dazed feeling as she ponders what to say. The woman has to repeat herself several times to get Mara’s attention.

“Hello!? Is anyone there? Is this an emergency?”

“I… I’m sorry, I’m here. I don’t know who to call,” she admits, her voice shaking wildly as she forces the words from her mouth.

“Do you need emergency services? What’s wrong?”

The woman’s voice is alarmed, and she feels even more foolish as she tries to answer. “No, I don’t know. There was an animal, it attacked me-”

“Are you badly injured? I can send an ambulance-”

“No, I’m not… It just scratched me,” Mara admits, wincing as tears once again spill over her lashes. She would be embarrassed if she had enough energy left in her body for the emotion.

“Where was the animal? Did you see what it was?”

Mara stutters over a reply, reluctant to tell the woman it was inside her house and a giant mutant wolf. But perhaps a second wolf has killed it, she thinks, so no worries. She feels a hysterical noise start in her chest, something like irrational laughter, and she has to stifle it. She tries to calm herself, to pull her mind back together from shock.

“It was outside,” she finally lies. “Outside my house, when I was coming home.”

“Are you safe now? Do you have the doors and windows secured?”

“Yes,” Mara confirms, but it feels like a bluff. Nothing about her current situation seems safe or secure. Her eyes flit constantly from the doors to the windows, ears straining past the phone call in dread of another howl.

“Did you see what the animal was?”

She wants to sob at that question again, not eager to answer it. A moment passes before she can hear the woman take a breath, readying herself to repeat it a third time. She doesn’t make her.

“I think it was a wolf. I know that sounds crazy, there aren’t wolves around here,” Mara hurries to say. “I swear it looked like one though, and I’m not making it up, please-”

“It’s alright,” the operator interrupts to attempt to soothe her. “It could have been a coyote, or maybe a stray dog. Huskies can look like wolves in the dark sometimes.”

Mara shakes her head but doesn’t answer.

“I need your address. I’ll send a deputy out first thing in the morning to take your report. Are you sure you don’t need medical assistance?”

“I-I don’t need medical assistance,” Mara replies, wanting to cry at the news that no one will be coming until morning. “But what if-its still out there, can’t anyone come now?”

“I know you’re afraid, but I can’t send a deputy right now for a non-emergency. Just stay inside your house and you will be safe,” the operator says, tone pacifying. “Give me your name and address, and I’ll make sure he is there first thing. Then I can stay on the line with you until you calm down.”

Mara gives her the information, but insists she doesn’t need the woman to stay on the call with her. She feels too humiliated, her story making her sound like she is over reacting. But she can’t tell what really happened, can she? Who would believe the true version of the night?

She ends up slumping against the wall, repeatedly talking herself out of calling Erica or Nicole. She doesn’t want to scare them by waking them in the early morning, and part of her doesn’t even want to bother telling the false story again. They will think she’s over reacting too, or crazy if she admits the truth.

Her eyes burn as she fights against letting them close. Her body feels like it is crashing into exhaustion as the adrenaline wears off, her head nodding towards her chest until she forces it back up. She should move, get up from the floor. But she can’t bring herself to budge, muscles feeling drained of the last reserve of energy. After a while, her eyes start to slide closed.

**Later**

Mara jerks awake, her heart hammering in her chest as she realizes she’d let herself drift off without meaning to. Dawn has come, weak morning sunlight entering through the front window. Mara shifts, her back aching from sleeping hunched against the wall. She tries to move her neck, wincing.

Nothing had broken down her door while she dozed, but that fact fails to reassure her. Her head aches, face sticky feeling with the residue of tears. As she stands, her calf gives another throb of pain and she cringes at the dried blood from the injury.

Mara forces herself into the bathroom, washing up quickly to remove the blood and streaks of makeup from her face. She still feels dazed, disconnected from her actions. Her mind is somewhere else, pondering the open door to Kylo’s house.

Yet again, she can’t help but think that this all started on the night he said he arrived in town. The noises in the woods around her house, the howling that woke her up every night. Could it be connected to him? Did she dare to let herself think of supernatural stories, of the horror movies she’d watched as a teen?

Mara can’t even bring herself to say the word aloud, feeling stupid for thinking it. But at the same time, it is the only explanation. Unless she’s simply lost her mind.

But she’d heard that rumbling growl from the huge wolf before. It had been in the club, as Kylo had glared at her from across the dance floor. And she feels renewed dread, realizing she recognized the black wolf’s eyes before they had glowed red. They had been the same warm brown shade as her new neighbor’s.

She doesn’t believe in things like that, though. Does she?

She's tempted to consider that she is going insane, but reasons that she can’t be imagining the wound on her leg. Something had done that to her, it had been real. The previous night’s events weren’t in her head, and Kylo’s empty house seems to suggest his involvement.

Mara tries to bandage the scratches on her leg, before putting clean clothes on and leaving the ruined dress on the floor near the shower. She’s startled when there is a loud banging at the door, edging out from the bathroom to stare at the entrance to her home.

“Mara Resnick? This is Officer Dameron. You called about an animal attack last night?”

She breathes in relief at the voice calling through the door, hurrying forward to unlock it and pull it open. The officer surveys her once. “Mara Resnick?” he asks again.

She nods. “Yes, sorry. I called last night. I don’t know if I should have-”

“It’s alright. You said it scratched you?” he asks curiously, eyes roving over her in search of the injury. They land on the bandage on her leg, visible as she’d pulled shorts on after showering. “Did it get you bad?”

“It’s not that bad. I cleaned it,” Mara replies, shrugging. He’s handsome, his demeanor suggesting he finds this to be a standard affair. It makes her regret calling, wishing she hadn’t even bothered. What good would it do? She can’t tell him she suspects her neighbor might secretly be a giant, black wolf.

“Well make sure you keep it that way,” he advises casually. “I got bit by a stray cat once and got a nasty infection.”

She nods once again, unsure what to say. He gives her an easy grin. “Anyway, you mind if I come in? I’ll take your report while my partner looks around the property.”

“Of course, come on in,” Mara agrees, opening the door wider for him and stepping back so he can enter. He does, but not before giving a glance back at the cement in front of her door. She notices the way his eyes look down at the stain there, now turning a rusty brown shade of red.

“What’s that mark from?” he asks curiously.

“It’s…It’s blood,” she admits. The officer’s face doesn’t show any surprise, leading Mara to conclude he had already suspected as much before ever asking. “It was a deer. Half a deer, I mean,” she adds quickly.

“Half a deer?” he repeats, that part getting a slight eyebrow raise from him as he steps through her doorway.

“It was there yesterday morning, when I went to take the trash out,” Mara explains. “My neighbor-”

She’s cut off by static coming from his radio before a voice comes through. “Dameron! I-I need you back here, at the rear of the property.”

Mara assumes it is the other deputy, but his voice sounds shaken. Dameron looks curious, unclipping the radio from his belt to speak into it.

“You got something?” he asks.

The radio buzzes with static once more before the voice comes through again. “I… I’ve got a body down here.”


	4. Chapter 4

Mara paces her living room, arms crossed so her fingers can dig into her own skin in a bid to keep herself together. She hadn’t thought to look at the time when Dameron had taken off to meet his partner, so she’s unsure how long she’s been waiting.

Had the officer found the body of the gray wolf? Mara hopes that’s it, but something about the way he’d referred to ‘a body’ seemed to imply it was a human body.

Who could it be? Had someone been visiting the little lake at the end of their road, and had an unlucky encounter with one of the wolves? But it had been the middle of the night, why would anyone be at the lake then? Unless…

Mara freezes, lips parting in dismay as she realizes she might have been mistaken in blaming Kylo. What if his door had been open, because one of those monstrous predators had chased him into the night? What if it was his body, laying down the road?

Stomach acid surges up her throat as she remembers the deer at her doorstep, trying not to imagine her neighbor being discovered in such a state. There is movement outside her living room window, and she can make out three more police cars on the road through the trees. Rumbling along behind them is an all-black van with something written in white on the side. It seems to confirm the body they’ve found must be human.

Mara can’t stand it anymore, grabbing her phone up from where she’d left it on the coffee table. Neither Erica or Nicole answer, and she leaves half intelligible voicemails for them. It’s a Sunday, and they had been out late. They likely won’t be up for several hours still, and must have their ringtones silenced.

She forces herself to try to drink some water, her throat feeling like it is burning from the bile. Mara holds a hand over her mouth, pressing as if it can help her to keep the liquid down. When she no longer feels as imminently nauseous, she returns to her anxious pacing.

What if Kylo had been killed by the wolves? And she saw his front door hanging open, and hadn’t told anyone? What if she could have gotten help for him, before it was too late?

But she’d been so foolish, thinking about werewolves and blaming him. It would have been logical to assume her neighbor was in just as much trouble as she was…But no. She’d deluded herself into believing that black wolf had Kylo’s eyes.

Guilt weighs down on her chest, tightening the muscles around her ribs as she tries to breathe. When the harsh knock comes on the door for the second time that morning, Mara nearly throws it into the wall in her haste to open it.

She doesn’t think she’s imagining that Officer Dameron looks a lot paler in the face than he had earlier. His carefree, easygoing attitude has disappeared as he eyes her up.

“Ms. Resnick, I’m going to need to ask you some questions,” he begins.

She nods, stepping back to allow him once more into her home. She can’t help herself from blurting out her own question before he has a chance to speak again. “Is someone dead?”

Dameron nods, gesturing at her couch. “Why don’t you have a seat?”

“Who is it? Do you know?” Mara presses, ignoring his request.

The officer surveys her, and though his expression is unreadable she feels like he is studying her. After a long moment, he shakes his head. “No. There’s no ID on the body. Can you please have a seat, Ms. Resnick?”

“You can call me Mara,” she corrects, allowing her weight to drop obediently onto the couch cushion.

The deputy stays standing. “I’d like for you to tell me what happened last night.”

“I got home late, and when I got out of my car there was this animal in the trees-”

“How late? Do you remember a time? Where were you coming home from?” he interrupts.

Mara’s mouth hangs open for a second at his tone, which is much more abrupt than it had been before. “I was downtown, celebrating my birthday with friends. I’m not sure of the time when I got home, but probably around 2 am?”

He gives her a nod, the only encouragement for her to keep speaking. She continues uncertainly. “There was this animal, and it chased me. It caught my leg, but I was able to get inside.”

“And you said it looked like a wolf?” Dameron asks. She nods. “Have you ever seen wolves before?”

Mara shrugs. “Only at the zoo.”

“And was this about the same appearance as the wolves you saw at the zoo?” he asks skeptically.

His gaze is beginning to make her even more nervous, and she clasps her hands to keep them from shaking. “Well, no,” she admits. When the officer only raises his eyebrows, she struggles to explain. “It was…It was bigger than them. It was really big.”

Dameron nods, his eyes finally dropping from hers as he seems to be considering what she’s said. His radio buzzes with static, and he moves quickly to silence it. “What can you tell me about your neighbor?”

“Kylo?” Mara asks. “He just moved in, I don’t really know him well.”

“Kylo…?”

“I don’t know his last name,” she replies. “I’m sorry.”

“He lives alone, though?” he checks.

“I think so. I’ve only seen him over there.”

“When’s the last time you saw Kylo?” Dameron asks, finally joining her in sitting. But he takes the armchair, leaving a good amount of space between them across the coffee table. He sits at the edge, as if poised to rise again without warning.

“Last night?” Mara replies before wincing. She’d answered without thinking, and stutters over trying to correct herself. “At least, I think I saw him last night? At this club, with my friends, but I don’t know for sure.”

The officer looks curious. “Do you know what time that would have been?”

“Maybe 10:30 or 11?” Mara tries to guess. “I don’t know... It was dark, but it looked like him.”

“And before that?” he continues.

“Well, I saw him in the morning yesterday. He’s the one who cleaned the deer up for me,” Mara explains. “I screamed when I saw it, and he must have heard and come running.”

Dameron nods. “Right, you mentioned the deer… Did he put it in the trash can?”

Mara shrugs slightly, eyebrows knitting together in worry. “I would assume? I was in here looking for something to clean the blood, so I didn’t really see.” She frowns as the words leave her mouth, realizing this probably doesn’t look good for her. She tries searching the officer’s face, but it is still locked to give nothing away.

“We’re going to search your trash. If it’s in there, we might want an expert to examine the remains,” he explains. “I’m afraid I need to ask you to do something that might be upsetting.”

Mara only raises her eyebrows questioningly at him, confused. The officer stands quickly, his brown eyes lingering on hers. “Your neighbor’s house is empty, the door was open when we arrived. It’s going to be easier to have you identify the body here, before we load it up for transport. Otherwise we’ll have to drag you all the way to the coroner’s office,” Dameron explains.

Mara feels her stomach flip at the news, trying to take a deep breath to steady herself. “Identify the body? Meaning you think it’s Kylo?”

For the first time since he began his nerve-wracking questioning, Dameron’s composure seems to break. He sighs, before throwing a hand in the air. “I don’t actually know what I think, Ms. Resnick. Mara,” he corrects. “But your neighbor is missing, so it would be a logical assumption that it could be him.”

“Alright,” she agrees. “I can…I can look. At the body.” Her heart starts beating faster, disagreeing with what she’s said aloud. She’d rather do just about anything else with her morning but look at a dead body. But she dutifully shuffles out of her house, following Dameron to his car.

**Minutes Later**

The car ride passed Kylo’s driveway takes only a minute or two, before they pull to a stop on the gravel behind the black van. Mara gets out, following the deputy as he leads her by the line of police cruisers and towards the lake. The water looks peaceful today, the morning sun warming its surface.

She’s already convinced herself the body must be Kylo. He is the only neighbor around for miles, and the way his house had been left dark and open the night before seems like a bad sign. Mara tries to ignore the guilt, but is tempted to blame herself for not doing more. Instead of being logical, she’d jumped to the crazy assumption that her neighbor was a werewolf. And it had most likely cost him his life.

They turn, slanting away from the water’s shore and along a path amongst the pine trees. The ground here is covered in dead leaves and needles, making their steps noisy as they crunch through the shade. It isn’t long before yellow tape comes into view, and a small crowd of police officers and individuals with cameras and equipment.

“Just look long enough to tell us if it’s him,” Dameron advises. “We’ll figure out next of kin for a formal identification.”

Mara nods as they approach the scene, her eyes falling to something on the forest floor, though she can’t make it out with all the people crowded around. But they part when they see the deputy leading her, falling back to make room for her to approach the crime scene. She tries to control the shake in her body, crossing her arms once more to wrap herself up.

She’s expecting to see Kylo, her stomach flopping erratically in her abdomen with the urge to be sick. She doesn’t want to see his handsome face covered in blood, but forces herself to edge forward regardless. Mara has to clamp her hand over her mouth when she finally sees the body, recoiling in horror. She backs right into Dameron, his hands falling to her shoulders to steady her.

“I know it’s a bad sight,” he says sympathetically. “But I just need you to tell me if it’s your neighbor.”

Mara shakes her head. “It’s not him,” she insists against her hand. “It’s not Kylo.”

Her gaze darts back to the dead man’s face for a double take, his gray eyes glassy and wide open. She stares at him, at the faded brown hair that looks filthy against his skull. He looks nothing like Kylo, and for a moment she is intensely relieved that her neighbor is not dead because of her stupidity. But the relief only lasts until her brain reminds her, she must once again be suspicious of Kylo.

“Have you seen this man before? Maybe around the area?” Dameron asks.

She shakes her head. “No, I’ve never seen him,” Mara answers. She can’t seem to tear her eyes away now though, as they are stuck in horror on the rest of his body. Unlike his face, which is mostly intact, the rest of him is not so lucky.

The man’s neck is shredded open, the pit of his throat nearly black with coagulated blood. More blood is drenched underneath him, dry now from where it had soaked the underbrush. Her eyes fall down, long enough to see the organs visible in his abdomen before she is stumbling back. There aren’t any clothes on him as far as she can see, nothing to stop whatever killed him from ripping him apart.

Officer Dameron guides her retreat, keeping her upright until she makes it far enough from the body to drop to her knees. Mara manages to withhold the dry heaves, but she feels like she is trembling with disgust. The deputy attempts to comfort her, leaving a hand awkwardly on her shoulder. “You did well, I appreciate you doing that,” he tries to reassure her. “I know that was awful, I’ve never seen anything that bad myself.”

She shakes her head, forcing herself not to cry. “No, I can’t stay here. I can’t… Not with that…that thing around.”

“Whatever it is, we’ll catch it eventually-”

“I can’t, it’s not safe,” she rambles. “I have to get out of here.” She doesn’t know how to make him understand. Something terrible is happening, and she can’t begin to explain sufficiently. The officer kneels in front of her, his brown eyes kind as he catches her gaze.

“Stay inside at night, keep your doors and windows secured. We’ll figure out what did this,” Dameron assures. “But if you really can’t stay here, I’m going to need to know where to find you. You’ve got to give me a name and address for whoever you stay with, in case I have more questions. Okay?”

She nods, but his tone is much more comforting than it had previously been. It diffuses some of her panic, and she accompanies him back to the car to watch him take down information for both Erica and Nicole.

**Later**

It’s late in the afternoon, practically evening by the time Mara gets off the phone with her friends. She managed to scare both of them with her frantic voicemails, though they hardly blame her once she tells them about the body. She’s decided to pack up enough things to stay away for a while. Erica has a more comfortable couch than Nicole, and has offered it up indefinitely.

Mara is pulling her suitcases out of her bedroom closet when her stomach gives a rumble. She realizes she hasn’t eaten yet, heading into the kitchen to make toast. Her appetite is lacking, and she makes slow progress forcing down a few bites of bread.

Then she returns to her messy bedroom, attempting to plan out a week’s worth of clothing for work. Mara ends up packing far more than is probably necessary, filling the large suitcase and a duffel bag with toiletries, clothes, and shoes.

On some level, she has a desire to take enough so she doesn’t have to come back to the house for a long time. The memory of the wolves is too fresh, the terror urging her out the door. Even though she still doesn’t understand why the black one had let her go, it hardly matters to her. She wants to get far away from the woods.

When she’s satisfied with her preparations, she takes the duffel bag out to the car first. Mara tosses it onto the backseat before popping the trunk of the sedan. Then she heads back inside, dreading how heavy the suitcase is. She’d barely managed to heave it out of the bedroom. Mara makes it a few steps inside the door before coming to a stop suddenly, at the sight of a large man in her living room.

She retreats back a step towards the door before her eyes can recognize him from behind, the tall body and shaggy black hair giving him away. Kylo is staring at her suitcase as he asks, “Are you going somewhere?”

Mara says nothing, gaping at his boldness. Had he just strolled right into her house? She thinks briefly of the police, but she’d seen their line of cars retreat up the road not long ago. Kylo turns around at her silence, quirking an eyebrow questioningly when his eyes meet hers. He’s wearing another flannel, the sleeves rolled up his muscular forearms. Everything about him is muscular, broad. She feels minute in comparison, his stature imposing in the small space.

She realizes his hair is damp, as if he’d just showered. The memory of blood-soaked fur flashes in her mind. She tries to not give in to the intimidation his presence brings, but the fear is inevitable. Where had he been, when that massive black wolf had snuck up behind her? Or was it possible she already knew the answer? Mara clenches her hands into fists, trying to not show weakness.

“Are you okay?” Kylo asks hesitantly, taking a step towards her.

Mara retreats again, just a single step left to the door in case she needs to run. “What are you doing in my fucking house?” she spits out.

Kylo’s brows furrow for a moment. “Sorry, I guess I should have knocked,” he admits slowly. His lips quirk downwards in a frown as he takes in her angry face.

“Yes, you should have knocked,” Mara snaps back in disbelief. “You need to leave. I don’t want you in here.”

“I wanted to make sure you’re okay,” Kylo says. She picks up on something in his voice, the way it’s pitched lower like he’s trying to soothe her. “I thought you might be upset.”

“Upset!?” she repeats indignantly. “The police were here all morning, and there is a dead body by my house! Yes, I am upset! Where have you been? They were looking for you. Your truck was here, but you weren't home!”

He’s snuck forward a few steps during her rant, so subtly she barely noticed. But it’s enough to close the distance between them, and Mara realizes she can smell him. That scent she’d picked up on before, something clean but masculine, reminding her of the woods. Something coils in her belly, something bizarrely like a spasm of pleasure.

“I’m sorry you’re upset,” Kylo breathes, and she freezes as he dares to come even closer.

“Where were you last night?” Mara asks, attempting to conceal her nerves with a demanding tone. “I came over and your door was open, your house was dark…” She trails off uncertainly, her heart beating faster. 

Kylo makes her wait for a moment, before he shrugs one of his shoulders. “I was around,” he says vaguely.

She swallows, licking her lips that feel too dry. He’s watching her, brown eyes searching over her face. She feels cornered, even with the door behind her. Mara knows then, looking back into his gaze, that she hadn’t been imagining it. That black wolf had Kylo’s eyes, before they had burned red in the night.

She tries to take a deep breath, but it only fills her nostrils with his scent again. It floods her brain, hazing over her thoughts and dulling her fear. The logical part urges her from beneath the fog to get away from him. Her hands begin trembling as she reaches behind herself for the doorknob.

She barely gets the door open a few inches before Kylo prowls forward, his hand rising beside her head to press against the wood. The door is forced closed easily, her pull on the handle no match for his strength.

Mara stares up at him, their eyes locked in some sort of silent battle. Fear still lingers enough to make her breathing shaky. But there is something else now, too. A feeling in her body that shouldn’t be there, given the situation.

Kylo leaves his hand on the door, and slowly matches it with the other, both his palms planting on either side of her head. She’s caged in between his arms, but the panic it should cause is restrained by strange excitement. That’s the only word that seems to fit, excitement. It rises in her muscles at his closeness. Mara’s confusion at the sensation only grows when she realizes Kylo is breathing heavier, his pupils dilated.

“Did I see you last night?” she ventures, before she can stop the words tumbling from her lips. “On your porch…Was that you?”

Kylo says nothing, only presses closer to her. Pleasure twists again in her core, catching her breath. Her body is responding strongly, hushing her mind that wants to cling onto fear and retreat. She’s held in place by the bizarre longing to press against him, to arch up into his body while he towers over her.

“I wouldn’t have hurt you,” Kylo says, the words nearly lost in how softly he speaks. He’s so close to her, their breath mingling.

Mara curls her hands against the door behind her back, to stop herself from reaching for him. What is she thinking? She should be running for her life, and yet every instinct is urging her the opposite way. A scraping noise captures her attention, and she turns her head up slowly to the side. Her eyes find his fingers, digging against the wood. His nails catch in the door, and she gasps in horror when she sees that they aren’t human nails anymore.

The scream is halted in her throat when Kylo leans down suddenly, taking advantage of her exposed neck. Mara freezes at the feeling of his nose nuzzling into her pulse point. “You feel it, don’t you?” he asks, and her eyes want to flutter closed at the sensation of his lips brushing over her skin.

She forces her eyelids open, clinging onto whatever shred of sanity is still ruling her mind. He’s breathing her in like the smell of her is a drug, his shoulders slumping into her. A harsh noise sounds from beside her head when his claws dig once more into the wood, as if he’s literally tearing into it for restraint.

“It’s waking up. That part of you that’s calling to me,” Kylo says softly, trailing his lips along her skin after he speaks.

Mara’s frozen, horrified as she realizes she’s aroused. Her body is tensed in anticipation, waiting for more. Longing for those lips to catch and kiss, for his teeth to sink in-

That thought is enough to make the panic surge finally, the fear chasing back whatever had taken over her momentarily. “I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about,” she insists, her voice coming out harsh. She pushes weakly against his wall of a chest, wanting to escape.

Mercifully, he lets her. He moves, letting her dart out from under his grasp and retreat further into her home. Kylo lingers by the door, turning to face her. He’s watching, eyes hungry and face predatory as she breathes heavily.

“I think you should go-I want you to go,” Mara stutters out. “I don’t want you in my house, I don’t want to be anywhere near you.”

Kylo finally tears his gaze away from her, shaking his head slightly as if trying to regain his senses. Then he’s still for a long minute, staring down at the floor. “I won’t hurt you, but I can’t say the same for the others,” he says.

“The others?” Mara gasps out. But he’d killed the other wolf, hadn’t he? The gray one that had snarled at her… Was that the body the police had found? Had he somehow been returned to a man in death? Were there more like him?

Kylo opens the door before he looks back at her. “If you leave, I can’t protect you,” he tells her. Her mouth drops open in shock, thoughts reeling at what he's said. But Kylo doesn’t add anything else, his eyes holding hers for just a moment longer before he walks out.


	5. Chapter 5

Mara stares at the gouges in the wood of her front door, trying to make sense of Kylo’s warning. Was he lying? He could be trying to scare her into doing what he wants. But something about his words seems to click, making sense of the bizarre series of events from the previous night.

Had Kylo been _protecting_ her?

It would explain the lack of aggression that black wolf showed her, the way it put itself between her and the gray wolf. But why? And why had the gray beast been so ready to sink its fangs into her, when Kylo’s monstrous alter ego was not?

She has the sudden urge to march herself over to his house, to demand answers from him. He'd all but confirmed her ideas, but in a way that told her nothing. She wants to put him on the spot, to make him admit aloud that more of him changes than those curving claws he’d sunk into her door.

But Mara talks herself out of it the moment she acknowledges that lingering flush to her skin. He’d been affecting her, in a way she’s never experienced before. The very smell of him nearly overruled her brain, silencing logic and replacing it with something…hungry.

She’s torn. Does she leave anyway, as she had initially planned? Or does she stay home, in case Kylo isn’t lying about there being others? Mara is overwhelmed with indecision. If there are others, and they are anything like that gray demonic creature that had chased her… she would stand no chance alone.

She decides to throw caution to the wind, driven by frustration. She needs answers, and she needs them now. She heads outside, and practically stomps over to his house. Her body is an odd jittery mess, tired from too little sleep and a conflicting bundle of emotions. She is afraid of him, but she's also confused by the swirling nightmare that has become her life. If forcing some answers from her terrifying neighbor can make sense of things, it's worth it.

Mara ducks beneath the branches of a tree, passing by his truck to head for his porch. She’s trying to psych herself up to question him, to not let her fear stop her, when she notices the porch is clean of blood. She distinctly remembers the droplets of it falling from the wolf’s fur onto the wood, but it is bare now.

She furrows her brow at the observation, before knocking on his door. Her fist makes a pathetically timid noise, and she waits only a moment before banging her hand against the door harder. “Kylo!”

Mara gets more and more frustrated as the seconds tick on, and he hasn’t opened the door. She resorts to peeking in his front window, seeing no movement in the house. Is he not home? Where had he gone?

She ends up heading back to her house when his is clearly vacant, and tries to keep herself calm. Kylo had said he wouldn't hurt her, right? And really... if he'd wanted to hurt her, he had multiple opportunities already. Which meant perhaps she would be safe for the time being. 

She texts Erica, telling her friend she’s decided not to come over for the night. Maybe it’s the wrong move, but part of her wants to trust her intuition. And it’s stuck on what Kylo said, on the feeling that he wasn’t lying.

She hopes she doesn’t regret the decision.

**Later**

It’s nearly nightfall when someone knocks on Mara’s door. She jerks upright from where she was dozing on the couch, blinking in confusion. The sound comes again, impatient, and she stumbles forward towards the window. Looking outside, she sees Erica’s car parked behind hers in the drive.

Mara opens the door to her friend’s smiling face. “What are you doing here?” she asks, withholding a yawn that wants to fight its way out. She’s exhausted, and her brain hadn’t fully turned off even as she napped. Her sleep had been punctuated by half-lucid dreams, and she kept waking herself up.

Her friend holds up a bag of take out food. “I brought dinner and wine. We’re going to have a sleepover.”

She moves over to make room for Erica to enter. “You didn’t need to do that…” Mara says. Part of her is paranoid about putting her friend at risk, even as there's a substantial amount of relief at the thought of not spending the night alone.

“It’s fine. I could tell you were still upset when you cancelled, so I thought we’d hang out here,” Erica insists. She’s already headed into the dining room, dropping the food onto the table. “I also took off work tomorrow, so if you want to do the same… Maybe we could take the day to check out apartments for you?”

Mara can’t help but give Erica a grateful smile. “And I brought your favorite wine. Moon Dreams,” Erica says. She brandishes the wine, shaking it free from the paper bag so Mara can make out the full moon on the side of the bottle. The irony of the imagery doesn’t escape her, but it is indeed her favorite.

**That Night**

The night is quiet as they watch movies and talk. There is no howling, nothing unusual. Mara hadn’t dared to go back over to Kylo’s once the sun set, telling herself she’d save that confrontation for the day time. The visit manages to brighten her spirits, and she gets sleepy after a second glass of the red wine. Erica is already dozing on the couch, so Mara shuffles into the bedroom and leaves the door open.

Mara falls asleep early, comforted by having someone nearby. As the night transitions to very early morning, she gets cold. But she’s too deeply asleep to wake up all the way. She tugs the blanket up higher, falling back into her dream almost instantly.

There’s something calling to her, something she was headed towards in the dream. The urge to move to it returns as soon as the dream starts back up, and she’s wandering blindly in the dark. She can’t see anything, somehow able to move without falling. But the longer she walks, the colder she gets. The blanket isn’t helping, she’s shivering as she presses on.

She feels whatever it is growing closer, and she trips as the ground becomes uneven. Mara recovers in the dream, righting herself to continue, but she’s stopped by a wall of fur. Something warm and soft presses her backwards, nudging into her shoulder to turn her. She’s confused, stumbling, but it’s right there. She leans against it, the heat warming her chilled skin. There’s a whimpering sound in response to her contact, a soft whine that lingers.

A comforting, masculine smell stirs something in her, however the logical part of her brain doesn’t speak up. It’s sleeping too heavily to interfere, leaving her to rely on instinct. She lets that mass of muscle and fur guide her, chasing the way she feels warm and safe with it against her side. It’s taking her away from where she had been headed, but she trusts it.

A howl pierces the dream, somewhere in the distance. She knows it’s meant for her.

**Morning**

Mara wakes up to the smell of coffee, opening her sleep-blurred eyes to see Erica waving a mug in front of her face.

“Wake up, sleepy head. You’re sleeping away the whole morning,” Erica chides, but she’s grinning good-naturedly.

She tries to suppress the giant yawn, but it pulls itself free from her anyway. When she finally recovers, she takes the cup of coffee and sits up. “Thank you. I’m still so tired, I feel like I dreamed all night,” Mara complains.

“You probably needed rest, after all that crazy yesterday,” Erica muses.

Mara nods, practically gulping down the caffeine. She stops when it nearly scalds her mouth. “I think I might try to get an apartment in the city. It would get me away from whatever is happening out here,” she thinks aloud. She tries to ignore the way her intuition flares up, disagreeing with what she’s said.

“Well it wouldn’t hurt to look at what’s available,” her friend agrees.

Mara nods uncertainly, deciding to go along with that plan. She could always back out later if needed, still quite determined to get more information out of Kylo. She throws back her covers to get out of bed, only to give an alarmed glance at Erica when her friend gasps.

“Mara, what the hell!?”

“What?” she asks, even as she follows Erica’s gaze down to the mattress. Her feet are filthy, caked in dirt against the light-colored sheets. Her mouth falls open in shock.

“How did that… What did you do?” Erica stammers in confusion.

Mara ignores her for a minute, struggling to recall her night of dreams. But only flashes come back, bits and pieces that make up no coherent memory. “I…I don’t know,” she stutters.

Erica looks horrified. “Were you sleepwalking? I thought you said that stopped!”

“It did, I don’t know-”

“The front door was closed when I woke up, I looked right at it! How did you get out and back in without waking me up?” Erica asks in confusion, but her voice soon grows stern. “Mara, this is serious, you can’t be sleepwalking outside when some wild animal is on the loose-”

“I know!” Mara interrupts. “Please just-stop for one second, okay, you’re making me freak out.”

“I’m sorry,” Erica whispers. Silence falls between them as Mara’s mind races. Had it not been a dream? She fights to recall more than the feeling she’d been headed somewhere in her unconscious state, but only comes up with the smell of Kylo and warmth against her side.

“What is happening to me,” Mara whispers, breaking the silence. “I think I’ve actually lost my mind.”

Erica frowns. “When exactly did the sleepwalking start? Is there something that could be causing it? Like maybe a new medication or something?” she wonders.

“No, not a new medication,” Mara disagrees. But a matching frown is twisting her features as she lets herself admit something. “But I did do a spell…”

“I’m sorry, you did a what?”

“A spell,” Mara repeats with a groan. “Remember how I said my mom was kind of a witch? There was this spell she wanted me to do, before my birthday…”

“What was it for?” Erica asks curiously.

She shrugs. “I don’t actually know…I mean, it said ‘To find your place in the world’…”

Her friend looks like she’s biting her tongue from making a snarky remark. “Well, do you have what you used still?”

Mara stands, sitting her coffee down on the nightstand to wait until she’s cleaned up. “Yeah, it’s in the hall closet. You can look if you want, I’m going to…well, wash my feet.”

Erica nods, leaving her to shuffle into the bathroom and shower quickly. When she emerges, wrapping a towel around her damp hair, she finds Erica out in the living room. Her mother’s spell box is open on the coffee table, and Erica is consulting her phone.

“Half of this stuff is toxic if ingested in large amounts,” Erica announces, scrolling.

“I wasn’t chowing down on it,” Mara grumbles, plopping next to her friend on the couch.

“What did you do with it then?”

She watches Erica shuffle through the materials, punching something new into Google, before answering. “I put it in the moon water.”

 _“Ooh, right._ The moon water.” Erica’s voice is lightly mocking, implying she finds the whole thing to be ridiculous.

“Yes, the moon water,” Mara repeats, rolling her eyes. “I don’t believe any of this junk either, but I promised my mom-”

“Woah, did you use this stuff?” Erica interrupts, holding up a little bag of dried leaves. Mara squints, reading the label her mother had left on it, “damiana” written in her slanting print.

“Yeah, I think so. Why?”

“It says eating its leaves is an aphrodisiac. Was your mom’s spell to get you laid?” Erica teases.

Mara huffs an impatient sigh. “I didn’t eat it, Erica. I don’t think my mom was concerned about my sex life.”

“Okay, well it _also_ says it’s used in spells to attract potential lovers,” Erica continues reading off her phone screen, before pausing to give her an eyebrow wiggle. “Passion, sensuality… Yeah this sounds like a really horny weed.”

Mara slowly closes her eyes in irritation. “I’m sure that’s not it. What about agrimony? I remember using that one too.” She forces herself to drink her now-cold coffee, already feeling the beginnings of a headache.

There’s a moment of pause before Erica reads off the results. “It says agrimony’s properties make it useful in hex breaking and the reversal of spells.”

“Reversal of spells?” Mara repeats, confused. Her hand rises, gripping her labradorite stone that dangles around her neck as she tries to remember the night she’d done the ritual. The necklace had felt different after the spell, though she’d brushed the observation aside at the time.

Mara realizes she’s a little angry, something she hasn’t felt towards her mother since she’d left. They hadn’t always gotten along well. They could go from having so much fun together, to heated arguments very easily. But now she suspects her mother had left her in the dark, taking off without bothering to clue her in. It makes those familiar feelings of contention come back. Resentment rises as she considers the possibility that her mother's spell got her into this mess. 

“Mara?”

“Hmm?” Mara forces herself to focus, noticing Erica’s quirked eyebrow.

“I said, it mentions using agrimony with some kind of candle to break a spell. Did you use a candle?” Erica repeats slowly.

Mara remembers the candle, even remembers dropping a pinch of agrimony into the flame. But she shakes her head instead. “Enough of this crap,” she says suddenly, snatching the bag of herbs up off the table. She tosses everything back into the wooden box, shutting it a bit harder than necessary. “I’ll make an appointment to see a doctor or something, but this isn’t helping.”

Erica frowns sympathetically, sitting her phone down on the couch cushion. “Alright. But it did say some of this stuff could be psychotropic in large amounts.”

“Psychotropic?”

“Yeah, like it affects your mind? And the damiana, it said can cause tinnitus,” Erica adds.

Mara just stares at her. “Tinnitus? Like ringing in the ears?”

Erica bites her lip, dropping her gaze. “I just mean… I didn’t hear any howling last night? And maybe, what you thought was howling-”

“I know the difference between my ears ringing and a freaking howl, Erica,” Mara snaps, suddenly annoyed. She regrets it immediately when her friend cringes, holding up her hands in a placating gesture.

“Fine,” she agrees. “I’m sure that’s not it, anyway. It’s not like you did shots of the moon water or anything.”

Mara can’t help the weird laugh at the mental picture of that. Erica grins, knowing she’s successfully defused the situation. She’s good at that, at breaking the tension and making someone laugh. Mara gives her a reluctant smile, but she’s grateful again to have Erica with her. It’s keeping her feeling somewhat sane, more rooted in reality.

“Come on, let’s head out. I’m excited for this apartment hunt!” Erica exclaims, jumping up from the couch with her enthusiasm. Mara follows, but not without remembering again what Kylo had said. _If you leave, I can’t protect you…_

**Late That Afternoon**

They’ve spent a large part of the day checking out apartments, and Mara even added her name to a wait list at one particularly nice complex near Nicole’s home. Eventually they decide to humor their stomachs and get some food. They eat in the outside food court, enjoying the warm weather of the day.

She’s thankful that Erica is quite talkative, as it keeps her mind from thinking about the spell. But when Erica decides to get ice cream, Mara is left alone at their table. She absentmindedly swirls a fry in ketchup, her brain immediately going back to what they’d read about the herbs.

Was it possible that spell she’d done had somehow attracted the wolves…? Had it attracted Kylo? He’d said something in her was calling to him. But she remembers him saying he’d arrived in town that same night. Surely that would be too fast to suggest a cause and effect between her spell and his arrival?

Mara sighs with frustration, letting the fry drop. If it were somehow the spell’s fault, then maybe she could undo it. She finds herself wishing, for the first time in months, that she could get a hold of her mother. But her mom hadn’t even bothered to leave a phone number, ruling that possibility out.

A shiver shoots up Mara’s spine suddenly, and she jerks with the uncomfortable sensation. She looks around, the perception that someone is watching her abruptly overtaking her thoughts. She searches the tables around her, but can’t see any eyes on her.

“You have some kind of luck lately,” Erica remarks, distracting her.

Mara turns back around from where she was twisted in her seat to look behind herself. Erica sits down, sitting a dish of ice cream onto the table. “First you get the hot neighbor, then you get a random guy giving you his number,” her friend explains.

Mara furrows her brow. “What?”

“Some guy wanted me to give you his number,” Erica explains, tossing a napkin down onto the table. It’s folded over twice. “Bugged me about it in line.”

She’s instantly suspicious, staring at that napkin with reluctance until a breeze threatens to push it from the surface. She snatches it up, asking, “What did he look like?”

She’s half expecting a description of Kylo, so she’s surprised by Erica’s answer. “Kind of tall, thin. Had really long hair for a guy. Like he’s going for a dirty Thor thing.”

“He was blonde?” Mara asks, confused. Erica only nods, happily scooping her dessert up to her mouth. Mara looks down at the napkin in her hand, unfolding it with a feeling of dread in the pit of her stomach. There isn’t a phone number on the inside.

Rather, there is a series of four numbers with a slash in the middle, above a cryptic warning: _You are running out of time._

Goosebumps cover her skin, her hair on her scalp prickling uncomfortably at what looks to be a threat scrawled onto the innocuous napkin. And the numbers…Mara realizes it might be a date. The month matches, the day only a few weeks away. Erica seems to notice something is wrong, her plastic spoon pausing halfway to her mouth. Melting ice cream drips from it before she lowers it back down.

“What is it?” she asks.

Mara shakes her head, handing over the napkin. “It’s not a phone number.”

Erica takes it, looking at it briefly before shaking her head. “What the fuck. That’s a sick joke to play on someone.”

“Joke?”

“Well he must be trying to mess with you, right? What a creep,” Erica concludes. When Mara says nothing, she crumples the napkin up. “Don’t let that bother you, seriously Mara. It’s just some jerk getting his rocks off messing with girls.”

Mara nods, but only a minute passes before her eyes start roving the people around them. She’s looking for the long blonde hair, that sensation like she’s being watched staying with her. But she sees no one out of place, nobody that is watching her despite what the chills that race along her skin tell her.

**Later**

Erica drives her home, and Mara is anxious at the thought of seeing Kylo again. Ironically, it isn’t just her suspicions of his night time activities that make her anxious.Though the worst part should be having a neighbor that turns into a supernaturally large wolf, she’s actually more alarmed by the way he affected her. The way she’d thought of his mouth as he trapped her against her door, imagined his teeth biting into her skin… Didn't she have any self preservation instinct? How could she feel anything other than terror towards Kylo?

Mara shivers, reaching out to turn the AC down in Erica’s car. They’re rambling down her road now, gravel bouncing up behind them as they go. “Thanks for going with me,” she says. “Really, I appreciate you doing this today.”

“Of course!” Erica reassures with a grin, slowing down to pull into Mara’s driveway. But the grin turns hesitant about the same time Mara’s gaze lands on the car already parked there. Behind her sedan is a big black car, the windows tinted dark.

Erica stops the car, giving Mara a questioning look. “Do you know who that is?”

Mara shakes her head, her anxiety only rising when the driver side door swings open. A man steps out, turning to shut the door behind himself and survey their vehicle. He’s tall, his hair a reddish brown. Though sunglasses hide his eyes, she can see his beard, trimmed neat on the lower part of his face.

“…Is he a cop, you think?” Erica asks, opening her car door.

Mara’s frozen, not even bothering to reach for her handle. But she realizes that Erica might be right. While he isn’t wearing a police uniform, there is something about him that suggests authority. And as she watches, he sweeps his jacket aside to unclip something from his belt. He holds it up, the sun glinting off what looks to be a law enforcement badge.

“United States Marshal,” he calls to identify himself, as Erica rises from the car. “Are you Mara Resnick?”

Erica turns to give Mara a panicked look. Mara forces air into her lungs, before stepping out of the car. “No, I’m Mara Resnick,” she admits.

The guy’s attention shifts from Erica to her, and he strides forward. She’s frozen by the car, her mind reeling as she tries to recall what she knows about federal marshals. Why would one be at her house? Of course there was the dead man, but that wasn’t anything a U.S. Marshal should be involved in. Even with her limited knowledge of law enforcement, Mara knows local police should be handling the investigation.

“I need to ask you some questions,” he insists. His head slides back towards Erica before he adds, “Alone.”

“Um. I can go,” Erica says quickly. Mara shoots her a terrified look, but her friend only returns it with an apologetic expression. “Call me, when you can. It’s going to be okay,” Erica says, trying to sound reassuring. She gives her one last frown before climbing back into the driver’s seat.

Mara nods, stepping away from the car as Erica starts the engine back up. The man only watches the car back up, before his sunglasses turn to Mara. She’s relieved when he takes them off, revealing a critical blue gaze.

“Can we go inside? This might take a while,” he asks.

She nods again, starting forward hesitantly. He turns to lead the way to her front door, and she catches the sight of his holster on his hip. She swallows nervously. “What did you say your name was?”

“I didn’t. But it’s Armitage Hux,” he replies. “Did you need to see my badge again?”

“N-no, that’s okay,” Mara stutters. Her eyes dart over to Kylo’s, noting with bizarrely displaced comfort that his black truck is still in the driveway. “I thought marshals did…witness protection, and stuff like that.”

“Witness protection is one of our roles, yes,” he agrees. They reach the stoop and he hangs back, letting her creep passed him to unlock her front door.

Mara tries to still her shaky hand to turn the key, pushing the door open. He gestures for her to enter first, so she does. She lingers in the living room, waiting to see what he does.

Her breath catches when he shuts the door, examining the gouges in the wood. Mara’s waiting for him to ask about them, or about the red stain in front of her door that he’d stepped right over. He doesn’t, finally turning his cold blue eyes back to her.

“I’m going to assume you’re here because of the body they found,” she begins uncertainly, unable to hold her tongue. “But I don’t understand why that would be a federal thing-”

“The dead body they found belonged to a fugitive I’ve been chasing for over five years,” he interrupts coolly.

Mara’s mouth is left hanging open before she closes it. “What…? What was he wanted for?”

The marshal’s eyes are searching her house, roaming quickly before he looks at her once again to answer. “He was a serial murderer. He left bodies in seven states.”

She feels like her breath isn’t quite enough to fill her lungs, the news surprising her. She sits down heavily on the couch, staring at the floor. Mara’s taken aback when he sits beside her, jerking to look up at his face.

His blue eyes catch hers, and she is trapped in his gaze. He’s intimidatingly close, and she has to force herself to not edge away from him. “As you can probably imagine, after years searching for him, I was rather surprised to hear he was found dead out in the middle of nowhere. I’m hoping maybe you can tell me why his body was less than a mile from your home.”

His voice is suspicious, his eyes daring her, prying into hers. “I-I gave a report, to the deputy-” she begins to explain before he cuts her off curtly.

“When I read your police report, Ms. Resnick, I couldn’t help but feel that there was a lot missing. A lot that _you_ left out.”

Mara’s trying not to panic, but she is worrying. What if she’s a suspect? Though, how could she be? There’s no way she could have killed that man, the way he’d been ripped open-

She clenches her hands, trying to stop them from trembling with nerves. “You’re not going to believe me if I tell you what really happened,” she protests weakly. “It’s crazy.”

The marshal’s expression changes, almost relaxing the smallest bit. But his eyes narrow on hers as he replies. “I think you’d be shocked at what I would believe.”


	6. Chapter 6

Mara can’t bring herself to start talking, to say aloud for the first time everything that’s been happening. The marshal seems to sense her hesitation, and he leans back from her. He mercifully looks away, and she feels like she can breathe fully again.

“All of his victims were women,” he says, as if making conversation. “Women who lived alone. They told friends or family about strange occurrences happening in the days before their death. Howling sounds at night. Animals scratching on the windows.”

Mara stares at him, horrified that she isn’t alone in her experiences. But he doesn’t meet her gaze now, continuing on in a somber tone. “A few mentioned dead animals being left at their door. But they all died the same way. Torn apart, throats slashed open. Autopsy reports say animal attack. But I knew…”

Mara’s eyes are welling with tears, picturing women just like her whose encounters with the twisted gray animal had ended differently. The marshal, Hux, raises his eyes to her slowly.

“I knew it wasn’t that simple. I tracked him, but I was always a step behind,” he says. “And as glad as I am that you’re alright, Ms. Resnick, I’m a little confused… How is it he ended up dying just like his victims?”

She swallows, shaking her head. “I had never seen him before…before Officer Dameron showed me his body,” she stammers out, her voice trembling.

But he shakes his head, his blue eyes now steady on hers, almost calming. All air of intimidation is gone. “I believe you, Mara,” he reassures her. “But I need to know what you saw that night, before his body was found. It wasn’t _just_ a wolf, was it?”

The tears spill over, a warm trail running down her cheek. “N-no,” she agrees. “It wasn’t just a wolf.”

Her words linger between them, but he’s silent now. Patient, waiting. “It-it was in my house,” Mara admits. “When I came home, I could hear it breathing. I turned the light on, and it stood up…It was standing on two legs, in the kitchen. It was-it looked like a-“ she cuts herself off, shaking her head as more frustrated tears escape her lashes.

“It’s alright,” he says softly. “I believe you. Go on.”

“It looked like a... a werewolf,” she finally says the word, spits it out like it’s a swear word. “It had red eyes, and its legs were… too long? I don’t know how to explain, it was this mutated looking thing. It chased me, so I ran outside and…”

She stops herself, the next words catching in her throat before she can speak them. The marshal’s eyes search hers, still waiting patiently for her to keep going. But she’s torn. Something in her is holding back from mentioning the black wolf, from exposing Kylo.

“And what happened next?” he prompts gently.

Mara looks down at her hands, focusing on them to answer. “And I got away, I lost it somehow in the woods. I ran back inside and locked the door.”

His gaze shifts immediately, the gentle expression giving way to returning suspicion. “That’s it?”

She nods. “I called the police, and I just waited and tried to not fall asleep until morning.”

“You only saw one wolf?” he asks.

She swallows, clenches her hands together. She should tell him, shouldn’t she? That there was a second wolf, that she nearly knew it was her neighbor…But she can’t bring herself to do it. If Kylo was protecting her, and if there were others…

“I only saw one,” she agrees.

His eyes burrow into hers, searching, for a long minute. Mara tries to not recoil from his scrutiny, and he sighs. “Strange. Normally wolves are pack animals.”

She raises a hand to wipe under her eyes, attempting to get rid of the tears clinging there. He stands, walking over to the doorway of her kitchen. His head cocks as he examines the floor there, and she knows he’s spotted the grooves its claws left. It had torn into the floor in its pursuit of her.

“Is there anything else you didn’t tell the deputy? I saw about the remains of the deer, but anything else strange from the last few days?”

“Howling,” she admits. “I heard howling at night…”

His head snaps up to her. “Every night? Even last night?”

“No,” she denies immediately. “Last night was the first night I didn’t hear it. Erica-that was my friend that brought me home just now… She was here last night. She can tell you, she didn’t hear anything either.”

Something about her voice is a little too frantic, she can hear it herself. But the marshal doesn’t call her out on it, disappearing into her kitchen instead. Mara tries to take deep breaths, to settle herself. But she thinks of those women, the ones who had been killed before her… She knows exactly how terrified they must have been. She’d come so close to the same fate.

When he reemerges from her kitchen, she’s surprised to see he’s filled one of her glasses with water. He sits beside her again, handing her the glass and a napkin.

“Thank you,” Mara murmurs, using the napkin to try to tidy up her face. She takes a sip of the water, before making a face and sitting it down. It’s got a strange taste to it, something oddly metallic.

When she looks back at the marshal, he’s watching her raptly. Something about it makes her suspicious, and she suddenly regrets opening up to him. There’s a knot in her stomach, unease growing at the way he’s tensing up himself. Her eyes flit down to his hand, noticing the way it’s hovering near his hip. Her eyes widen, remember the holster she’d spotted there.

For one terrifying moment, she imagines him pulling his weapon. But it passes, and he relaxes easily. His posture returns to normal so fast, she almost second guesses herself. But she knows she’d seen it, his body preparing itself for something. What had he been expecting out of her?

“I’m going to be in town for a while, Ms. Resnick,” he says. “I want you to know that if there are more of these things, more like him… You don’t have to worry.”

“You think there are more?” she asks. He nods once.

“I do. And I’ll take care of them,” he replies simply. Then he’s standing up, walking briskly to her front door.

“Wait-Is there anything I should do? I mean, should I-” she’s rambling after him, startled by his sudden retreat from her home.

He pauses at the door to look back at her. “Consider getting out of here, before the next full moon. You’ve got three weeks.”

**Minutes Later**

Mara watches the black car with the tinted windows retreat from her driveway, before she realizes she doesn’t have any ways of reaching him. What if she needed to contact him?

She finds her phone, pulling it out of her bag to dial the sheriff’s office once more. The woman who answers assures her Deputy Dameron will return her call, and it’s only a few minutes before he does.

“Mara? Is everything okay?” he asks when she picks up.

“Yes, everything’s fine. I just spoke to the U.S. Marshal, and I realized I didn’t get his number,” she admits. “I thought maybe I should have it, in case anything else came up?”

Dameron is silent for a moment. She frowns. Should she not ask for his contact information? Surely that was a reasonable request, given the ongoing investigation?

“What U.S. Marshal?” he asks finally.

“The-the one whose investigating what happened to the dead man? He said he’s been chasing him for years, because he’s a serial killer-”

“Mara, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Dameron admits quietly. “Where did you hear about this?”

Mara’s heart feels like it’s dropped out of her chest. “He was just at my house! He said he was a U.S. Marshal, his name was Armitage Hux!”

“Did you see a badge?”

“I…I saw one, but I didn’t look close,” she admits. “But he said that dead man was a fugitive, he was wanted for murder.”

“We haven’t been able to identify the body yet,” Dameron insists. “I don’t know who you just talked to, Mara, but I don’t know of any marshals involved with the investigation.”

Mara feels like her head is spinning, all too familiar panic returning to her body. “Who the fuck was he then?” she exclaims. “He was just in my house!”

“I don’t know,” the deputy replies. “It might have been a reporter, or one of those supernatural conspiracy theorists. Sometimes they will try to insert themselves into weird cases-”

But she’s tuning him out, her breathing shaky as she tries to keep it together. She can’t take much more of this, she’s so confused.

“I can come out there tonight,” Dameron offers, seeming to pick up on her panic. “Mara, I can come check on you-”

“No,” she says quickly. She has other plans for who she needs to talk to tonight. “No, that’s fine.”

“Are you sure? I could have an officer swing by-”

“No, it’s alright. I’ll be alright,” she insists.

“Just don’t talk to anyone else without calling me first, okay? It was probably a fake badge. Guy’s probably harmless.”

“Right,” she agrees. “I understand.”

“Okay… Here, I’m going to give you my cell phone. I want you to call me, if anything else happens. Okay? Don’t hesitate.”

She agrees to reach out if she needs him, writing down the number on the envelope of a bill on her kitchen table. When they hang up, she adds it to her contact list. But then she sits her phone down, and readies herself for what she can’t put off anymore.

The sun’s already nearly disappeared outside, the woods pitching into twilight quickly when she leaves her house. As soon as she closes her front door, she feels like eyes are on her. She ignores it, walking as fast as she can without running to Kylo’s.

Mara is nearly to his truck when she hears rustling in the trees that line the side of his property. She picks up her pace, rushing for his porch when she hears a twig snap somewhere in the brush. She pauses in front of the steps to his door, turning to search the trees.

Red, glowing eyes greet her, a hulk of shadow concealed amongst the trunks. She squints, but can’t make out more as night has descended rapidly.

“Kylo?” Mara calls hesitantly. The red eyes only blink at her. “Kylo, I swear, if that’s you-”

“It’s not me.”

Mara jumps, turning around to realize Kylo has come up behind her silently. He’s pulling a flannel on over his bare shoulders, his eyes dark with anger. She looks away from him, back at the red eyes. They’re just watching, whatever or whoever they belong to is staying at the edge of the woods.

“Get behind me,” Kylo orders.

He doesn’t need to tell her twice, and she skirts around him, only stopping when her ankle bumps into the bottom step of his porch. Kylo takes a few steps forward, and her breath quickens when she hears it. That low growl like she’d heard at the club, vibrating in her belly. It’s an angry sound, something aggressive, rumbling from the man in front of her. 

The red eyes blink again, before they vanish. She searches the trees, trying to see the shadow of the animal’s movement. But it’s getting too dark, everything passed his lawn is blurring together in the night.

“Get inside,” Kylo says, still facing away from her.

Mara hesitates, but he rounds on her, his dark eyes narrowing. “ _Go inside,”_ he repeats. She’s stumbling up the steps immediately, something commanding in the low pitch of his voice that she finds hard to disobey.

She steps into his house, warily keeping her eyes out on the tree line until he joins her and shuts the front door. Mara looks around, spotting stacks of boxes he hasn’t even unpacked yet. Nothing about the interior of his home suggests anything unusual. Then again, she doesn’t know what she’d been expecting. Obviously the guy’s couch wouldn’t be werewolf patterned or something.

Mara huffs slightly, almost too tired to find the thought humorous. It catches Kylo’s attention, and he pulls his eyes away from the door to focus on her. He reaches up, raking a hand through his hair to push it back from his face. She notices the way his eyes trail down her body before returning to her face, appraising. 

“You okay?” Kylo asks quietly.

She’s about to say that she’s fine, to repeat the assurance she’d just given Dameron about her current state. But she stops herself when his eyes catch hers. They affect her, stalling the lie before she can bother to say it. She backs up a step, trying to clear her mind with more space between them.

Mara ends up shaking her head. “No. I’m not okay.”

Kylo takes a step towards her, and she dances back another step in turn. She’s feeling timid, paranoid about what happened the last time they were close. She’s already trying her hardest to ignore how much of him she can see. His jeans ride low, shirt hanging open. The muscles of his chest are visible, that dark trail of hair leading from his belly button to disappear down under his waistband. 

She tears her eyes away, rolling them at the wood floor of his living room. Her neighbor’s a monster, one she’s relatively certain has killed a man, and she’s standing there checking him out. What is wrong with her? She’s literally shaking, probably at the edge of a mental breakdown, she shouldn’t even be noticing his body.

At least now she knows she’d be the one to die first in a horror movie, if the villain was hot. Though, Erica might give her some competition. Mara laughs at that thought, a trembling, unstable sound.

“I feel completely insane,” she admits, the laughter turning into a desperate huff that hints at tears. She holds them back, trying to not embarrass herself.

“You have no idea what’s happening, do you?” Kylo asks gently. She looks back at his face, reading concern and some amount of surprise in his features.

Mara shakes her head. “Does it have to do with the spell?” she guesses.

Kylo’s eyebrows raise up curiously. “Huh?”

“A… a spell that I did? Is that why you’re here?” she guesses. “I did this spell, with… damiana and a candle…and moon water.”

“A spell…” Kylo repeats slowly, before something seems to click for him. “Is that what you were doing naked in your backyard?”

Mara’s mouth falls open in horror, her cheeks reddening. “You _saw that_!?”

Kylo’s lips quirk up, as if he’s fighting to withhold a grin. He fails, the smile taking over his face. He at least has the decency to drop his gaze from hers as he admits, “Yeah, I saw that.”

Somehow, that one fact manages to be the tipping point, and she throws her hands in the air. “You know what? Fuck it. I’m just going to go out there and let that thing kill me.”

Kylo’s smile fades, and he shakes his head. “He’s not going to kill you…”

“What?” She frowns in confusion. Isn’t that what the gray wolf had been about to do? Kill her? “What does he want, then? What do _you_ want!?”

Kylo sighs, rubbing at his neck uncertainly before he shrugs. “Do you want some coffee?”

“…Coffee.” Mara gapes in disbelief. 

“I could use some. I haven’t been getting a lot of sleep lately.”

She stares at him, trying to process. Nothing about this confrontation has gone how she might have imagined. She certainly wouldn’t have imagined an offer of coffee. “Um. Sure. Why not,” she says finally.

Mara follows him into his kitchen, making it a point to sit in one of the stools on the opposite side of the island from him. She crosses her legs, one of them shaking with nerves as she watches him make their drinks. She waits for him to sit two mugs down on the counter, the coffee inside still steaming, before speaking again.

“You didn’t answer my question. What do you want?” she asks.

Kylo plants his elbows on the countertop, hunching over to rest his weight there. She freezes when his brown eyes lock onto hers. Her attention is pulled downwards, however, when he catches his bottom lip with his teeth, biting it only to slowly release. That intoxicating scent of his registers in her brain, mingling with the coffee all too pleasantly. She has to stop herself from breathing deeper to take it in.

“I’m going to tell you something you don’t want to hear,” Kylo says quietly.

His voice sends shivers down her spine, and she can’t tell if it’s from fear or attraction. She licks her lips, trying to ignore that she’s feeling pulled to him again. What is that? Why is she being so irrational? She looks away, scooching back the stool to escape the scent of him. It’s not enough.

“I just need to know what they want, what all of you-whatever you are…want,” Mara stammers out nervously. “I need to know how to make it stop.”

“It’s not going to stop,” Kylo says immediately.

Her eyes snap back to his, desperate at how assured he sounds. “What? Why? What did I do?” she asks quickly.

His pupils are blown wide, she realizes. The black is nearly blocking out the brown of his irises, his lips parted as he breathes in. Mara considers retreating from his kitchen, remembering how he had seemed drunk on proximity to her before. She should back off, she thinks. They’re too close, and it’s changing something in Kylo. His demeanor is shifting, the man who had just casually made her coffee disappearing, eaten up by something far more animalistic.

He takes his time answering, shifting even closer almost imperceptibly. His upper body dwarfs the counter between them. “It’s not what you did, it’s what you are. They won’t stop. Not until you’ve been claimed,” Kylo explains slowly.

Mara stands up suddenly, shoving the stool back with a screech. She’s not liking that look that’s taking over Kylo’s eyes, something wild that makes her heart race. “Claimed? Claimed for what?” she asks, edging back from the counter.

Kylo stands straight, rounding the island slowly. His body language is different now, his walk somehow predatory. “For a mate,” he answers.

In some other situation, she might’ve laughed at the ridiculousness of that. But now, with Kylo stalking towards her as she retreats across his kitchen, it’s more threatening than laughable. She doesn’t dare scoff, fear gripping her as she continues to back away from him.

“They can’t control themselves. I don’t blame them,” Kylo admits. “I can barely control myself lately. Something’s changed.”

She backs into the wall when he doesn’t stop, her heart now frantically beating in her chest. Kylo’s ravenous eyes are terrifying her, almost as much as the memory of his claws. “Stop,” she pleads.

He listens, his advance paused before she is completely trapped. “I don’t understand… Please,” Mara says desperately. She can’t make sense of what he’s saying, and worse yet, it’s happening again. She can feel the fog of lust creeping back into her, hushing reason and replacing it with instincts that lurk in the base of her brain.

“It’s been so long since there’s been a woman like you…I almost gave up,” Kylo says, his tone so husky with need that she's stunned by the sound. “And then I find you. And you’re fucking perfection…” His chest gives away his heavy breathing, his fists clenched so tightly that veins are standing out against his hands. True to what he’s said, he looks barely in control.

Mara struggles with her thoughts, with organizing them into a response. It takes her a moment to dispute him. “I’m pretty sure there are millions of women...”

Kylo prowls closer, and her body tenses with excitement, her breath catching. “You aren’t like them,” Kylo tells her, just his deep voice managing to stir her arousal. “You’re like me.”

Mara shakes her head slightly, enough of her brain still functioning to refuse what he’s said. “Like you? I’m not-”

“You are,” he growls impatiently.

She flinches when he lunges forward that last step between them, pinning her against the wall. There’s no escaping the scent of him now, the warmth of his large body pressing so close to her. Mara feels intoxicated, and judging by Kylo’s feral eyes, he’s in no better state.

“Do you want me to prove it?” Kylo asks. “One bite, and I can wake up that animal hiding inside.”

She’s trembling as he presses closer, bending down. She doesn’t realize she’s planted a hand against his bare chest until she registers the heat on her skin. She can’t stop her searching gaze, flickering with confusion between his challenging eyes and his lips.

“I don’t-I can’t think,” Mara mutters helplessly. The smell of him, she can’t block it out, it’s making her mouth water. She wants to taste him, wants him on her tongue.

Kylo’s hand comes to her chin, tilting her face up to expose her throat, and a fresh wave of fear hits her at the thought of him actually biting her. Her eyes well up with tears, overcome with conflicting urges. Whatever part of her wants him is raging with frustration, while the rest is terrified. “Don’t-please don’t,” she whimpers frantically.

But he holds her there, his face drawing close enough that she can feel each soft exhale from his lips. “I won’t,” Kylo says roughly. “When I take you, you’ll be begging for it.”

Her eyes widen at what he’s said, her hand sliding from his chest to grip onto the edge of the flannel. Kylo’s brown eyes hold hers, searching, desperate, hungry. That lust that’s taken over her brain only grows, body needy with desire. “Kylo,” she breathes.

Mara sees the flicker begin in his irises, a spark like a flare that grows. The red glows brighter, until it overtakes the brown, his eyes burning into hers. She cries out in alarm, but the sound is muffled by his lips catching hers, his kiss dominating.


	7. Chapter 7

She freezes for a moment as Kylo overtakes her. His warm, hungry lips move against hers. His arm is around her back, he’s pulling her towards him, and she clings onto his flannel. Her fingers twist in the material when his tongue slips against her lips, and then she can taste him. She parts her lips willingly, licking against his tongue, the sensations hijacking her brain with arousal.

For one delirious moment, she’s clinging to him, wanting more. But then Kylo recoils. He tears away from her, throwing himself backwards. His hand raises to his mouth, wiping as if to get the taste of her off his lips.

Mara’s confused, breathing hard to catch her breath. She doesn’t understand why he pulled away. Had she done something wrong? Kylo’s eyes are accusatory, as he stares at her like she’s hurt him.

“Silver,” he spits out. “Did you think it would kill me?”

“What!?”

His eyes narrow in a glare, and she flinches as he pushes her to the wall, furious. “What did you do!? Did you drink it?”

Kylo grabs her neck, and she panics, digging her fingernails into his forearm. He doesn’t release his hold, towering over her with his anger. She imagines him squeezing much harder, knows how easily he could choke the life from her with one hand. And yet he doesn't choke her, doesn't squeeze at all. He just holds her there, a threat that keeps her trapped. 

Mara nearly sobs with fear at his sudden change of mood, scratching at his arm enough to draw blood. Kylo doesn’t even seem to notice the wounds she’s inflicting, his eyes burning red again as he stares her down.

“Why would you?” he growls. “Don’t you know I’m the only thing keeping them from tearing into you? They won’t stop just because you beg.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” she pleads, voice pitching high in terror. “Please, I don’t know!”

Her tears overflow, and Kylo’s eyes flicker between hers before his anger seems to diminish. His eyes become human once more, the scowl falling from his features. “Silver. I’m talking about silver,” he breathes.

“Like the fucking metal!?” she gasps in disbelief. But then she drops her eyes from him, as she remembers how strange the water in her glass had tasted earlier. It had left a metallic tang lingering long after she’d swallowed. “Did he put it in my water?” Mara asks, confused.

“Did who put it in your water?” Kylo demands. But his grip almost leaves her neck, just his fingertips lingering against her skin.

“The marshal-the marshal who wasn’t a marshal,” she tries to answer before wincing her eyes closed in irritation at her tongue-tie. “He came to my house, said he was investigating the dead body the cops found. He got me a glass of water because I was upset. But when I called the deputy after he left, Dameron said there was no marshal on the case.”

Kylo’s touch leaves her, and he steps back. “He was testing you.”

“Testing me?”

“Is the glass still there?”

“It’s still there,” she confirms. “But what would-”

“Show me,” Kylo demands.

**Minutes Later**

Kylo picks up the glass, barely getting it close to his nose before he makes a disgusted expression. Mara watches him dump it down the sink drain, fidgeting anxiously next to her fridge.

“Does this mean he’s suspecting me? Who is he, some kind of.. like…werewolf hunter?” she asks, cringing at the corny phrase.

“Well, you drank it. So if he was suspecting you, he’s probably not now,” Kylo answers, leaning against her counter to look at her. “Did you tell him about me?”

“No,” Mara shakes her head, but Kylo’s eyes narrow suspiciously.

“Mara,” he says, tone warning.

“I didn’t,” she insists. “I thought about it. But for some reason, I just…didn’t want to.” She sees some of the tension relax from his body at that. “Who was he? Do you know?”

“Best case scenario, he’s a hunter. Worst case scenario… Well, let’s just hope it’s the first option.”

Mara raises her eyebrows at how he seems reluctant to finish his sentence. “What’s worse than a hunter?”

Kylo’s expression is unreadable. “It doesn’t matter. Either way, I’ll take care of him.”

“You’ll take care of him?” she repeats in alarm. “What does that mean!? You’re going to kill him?”

He shrugs. “He’s a threat to me and mine.”

He starts to cross the kitchen, to come closer to her. Mara throws up a hand to try to halt him. “No. You stay on that side, and I’ll stay on this side.”

Kylo cocks an eyebrow. “What?”

“We do a lot better with some distance between us,” she insists.

“I think we were doing just fine, as close as we were,” he argues, tone flirtatious. She has to look away from the grin that quirks his lips, finding it entirely too appealing. He has some nerve, flirting with her when he'd just terrified her. Then again, he had assumed she'd tried to kill him. They've gotten off to a rocky start, and it doesn't seem to be improving. 

“I need to be able to think,” Mara says. “I still have a hundred questions for you.”

Kylo groans. He looks tired, she realizes. “Do I have to answer them all, right now?”

“I’m sorry, is my entire life becoming a shit show an inconvenience for you?” Mara retorts sarcastically. She takes a deep breath, unable to stop herself from unloading on him just a bit. “None of what you said made any sense, by the way. I feel like I’m losing my mind, and some fake cop just tried to drug me with silver. I’m sorry for wanting to understand.”

Kylo gives a huff. “Fine. Can you at least make some coffee, though? The stuff at my house is probably cold by now, and I’m exhausted.”

She nods at the compromise, turning on the coffee maker. “Why haven’t you been sleeping enough?”

“Well, last night I had to stop this beautiful woman from sleepwalking herself off a cliff,” he drawls.

Mara gives him an incredulous look. She knows there’s quite a few ledges and steep slopes out in the woods, but they are pretty far from her property. “You’re serious?”

“Quite.”

She swears colorfully, ignoring Kylo’s hushed laughter. “It’s not funny. Do you know why I’m sleepwalking? Is this a normal thing when someone’s being stalked by your kind?”

“First of all, its _our_ kind,” he corrects. “And they’re calling you, to lure you off my territory.”

She narrows her eyes in disbelief. Is he that arrogant, that he already assumes she will ask to be turned into some sort of monster? Or is he implying, or more aptly, threatening that he won’t back off until she gives in? Either way, Mara finds herself glaring at him indignantly. She can’t deny Kylo has some strange effect on her, but she resents his assumption.

“It’s not _our_ kind. I haven’t been bitten, and I don’t plan to _get_ bitten, despite whatever you seem to be so cocky about.”

Kylo smirks. “If you’re so sure about that, come over here. Get a little closer.”

Her mouth drops open at his voice, deliberately seductive. Is a werewolf really standing in her kitchen, flirting with her…about biting her? Is this really her life right now? Mara shakes her head, completely exasperated.

She’s tired enough that her thoughts keep almost making her laugh, in a crazy sort of way. So many freaky things have happened lately, that Kylo seems to be the least terrifying thing around. Which is saying a lot, she thinks…given that he’d just pinned her to a wall with one hand, while his eyes burned like the hounds of hell. He still scares her plenty, but she is at least growing used to his presence.

“I’m good, staying human, over here,” she snipes back.

His smirk lingers as she pours the coffee into a mug for him, leaving it halfway between them before retreating to her side of the room. Kylo rolls his eyes, retrieving it. “You already aren’t human, not entirely. It’s called latency. You were born one of us, it just takes a bite from an alpha to bring it out.”

She scoffs in disbelief. “Well, now I know you’re full of shit. I might not know my dad, but I’m pretty sure my mom would’ve mentioned him occasionally turning into a giant wolf.”

Kylo’s face grows more serious, the smirk falling away. “It wouldn’t have been your father that mattered. The child takes on the nature of their mother.”

Mara stares at him. There’s no way. She would have noticed, wouldn’t she? At some point in her entire life, she would have found out if her mother was secretly a werewolf…right?

Kylo clears his throat, and she looks up to see him studying his coffee cup intently. “Look, I don’t know how to say this better-”

“You’re trying to tell me my mom was a fucking werewolf, and I just didn’t notice?” she snaps.

Kylo’s eyes widen, and he lifts the coffee cup. She stares as he drains it quickly, setting the cup down and running his hand through his hair as though delaying an answer. Another moment passes before he awkwardly tries again. “I imagine this must be a lot to take in…”

“I’m not taking it in, because it isn’t true. My mom isn’t, wasn’t…” Mara stumbles over the wording. She falters as emotions surge up from somewhere she didn’t know they were buried. “I don’t even know where the fuck my mom is, okay? I don’t even know if she’s alive. But I know she wasn’t a werewolf.”

There’s silence between them, as she tries to fight the tears that want to appear. She’s tired, she realizes. Tired on a level that isn’t even physical, that sleep probably won’t help. She feels like she’s caught in a nightmare version of Wonderland, a place that didn’t bother to make any sense.

When Kylo speaks again, his voice is softer. “I can feel it there, Mara… It’s buried deep, but I can feel it in you.”

She bites the inside of her lip, feeling desperate. She doesn’t want to think about the implications, if what he is saying is true. When Mara lets herself meet his eyes, they’re sincere. And she knows, deep down, that he isn’t lying. Her instincts urge her to trust him, against all reason. But she hates the thought of trusting those instincts, the same ones that had reacted with a surge of arousal picturing his teeth against her skin.

“I’ve been feeling it for months,” Kylo continues quietly. “It’s why I came here. I came for you.”

Mara shakes her head, the tears finally falling. Kylo starts for her, but she recoils and he seems to take the hint. He stays back, frowning.

“You came for me? And that gray wolf, the one you killed, he came for me too?” she rants, her voice quickly becoming hysterical. “And whoever is out there right now? You all came for me, because you all want a mate, right? Like I’m some piece of meat up for grabs-”

“That’s not it-”

“Isn’t it!?” Mara yells back, surprising herself with how loud her voice grows. She pauses before continuing, voice shaky now as she tries to contain her frustration. “That’s all this is, right? You’re just after me like I’m a bitch in heat!”

Kylo’s eyes darken with anger. “Don’t fucking say that.”

Mara searches his eyes miserably. She can’t bring herself to voice the worst part of all this, the part that guts her. If he’s right about her, that means her mother never told her. That she knew all along, what Mara was destined to become. And her own mom hadn’t bothered to warn her, to prepare her at all. She’d left her ignorant, defenseless, waiting to be blindsided.

It makes her want to rage as much as it makes her want to crumple into sobs. And she can’t even begin to tell Kylo the depth of betrayal she’s feeling. But maybe some of it shows anyway, as his gaze softens against hers.

“I wanted to do it the right way…the human way,” Kylo murmurs, edging closer. “Before it ever got further. But something changed, I don’t know what…It’s driving me crazy, my instincts are stronger than I’ve ever had to handle.”

Mara reaches down to her necklace, lifting the labradorite stone up to run her fingers over the smooth surface. She’s thinking of the spell, the one she’s stupidly performed without understanding what she was doing. Was it to blame for what changed? But why would her mom do this to her? Surely this couldn’t be what she had planned, when she’d written out the ritual and made her promise?

Mara leans against the wall behind her, sliding down to sit on the kitchen floor. She has to force herself to stop thinking about her mom, her chest beginning to hurt. “What if this is my fault? What if the spell I did is what made it this way?” she asks faintly. “I don’t want this. I don’t want any of this.” 

Kylo shakes his head, coming forward. She doesn’t even bother to argue with him this time, too defeated feeling to protest his closeness. He drops down in front of her, searching her eyes. She notices his hands clench into fists, but he seems to be in control for the moment.

“If it’s who you are… I don’t know that you can turn away from that, Mara,” he says gently.

“It’s not just that…You said they won’t stop,” she says, huffing with exasperation. “How long can I even make it? What if another one tries to attack me?”

Kylo swallows, she watches his jaw clench as he looks away. “Then I kill them.”

Mara hears a noise that is a bizarre mixture of hysterical laughter and sobbing tear from her throat, and she presses a hand over her mouth to stifle the sound. “This can’t be real,” she mutters from underneath her fingers.

Kylo shrugs, his eyes landing back on hers. She tries to look away, but ends up glancing back, feeling ensnared by his gaze. She finds it comforting, his eyes pleasing to her. Something shivers in her spine at the way he draws a little closer, something that is becoming familiar now. It quivers with pleasure at his handsome face, his dark hair.

She looks down to his lips, thinking of that brief taste she’d gotten earlier. What would have happened, if he hadn’t tasted silver on her tongue?

Kylo stands abruptly, pulling away from her without warning. She watches him pace, his hands balling into fists still, and realizes he’s working to keep himself under control.

Mara takes a shaky breath, letting her head fall back to thud into the wall. Her mind can’t handle anymore, so overwhelmed that she feels like she’s at the verge of spacing out. She’d like nothing more than to stare, unseeing, at the blandest wall to ever exist.

“I need to just… sleep. Or become catatonic. Either or,” she sighs. “I can’t deal with all this.”

“Then sleep,” Kylo suggests.

“Yeah, maybe if I’m lucky, I can make it off a cliff tonight,” Mara retorts sarcastically. At least then, she wouldn’t have to deal with the inescapable mess of her life.

Kylo stops his pacing to give her a tired look. “I’ll make sure you don’t make it that far. Hell, let me crash on your couch and I’ll make sure you don’t make it out the front door.”

“My couch?” she repeats cautiously. “Are you sure that’s a smart idea?”

He studies her for a moment before he comes over, stopping in front of her again. This time, he holds out his hand. Mara hesitates at the sight, before daring to take it. He helps her to her feet, before dropping her hand from his grip.

“Either I’m up all night on guard, and you go wandering off again. Or I get some sleep here, and we make sure you stay put,” Kylo offers her a choice.

Mara’s uncertain, torn by the thought of letting her guard down completely around him. But if that dream the previous night was real, then she knows she’s already been asleep around Kylo. And he’d gotten her back home safely, hadn’t he? Perhaps the part of her wanting to trust him is reliable.

“You’ll stay on the couch?” she asks hesitantly.

Kylo rolls his eyes. “Yeah, I’ll stay on the couch. Or maybe the floor. You’ve got a tiny couch.”

“Is it tiny, or are you just massive?” Mara retorts. That earns a slight laugh out of Kylo, and he heads into her living room.

Mara grabs some blankets from the hall closet, following him only to see he’s stripped the flannel and his boots off. She freezes at the sight of his back, broad and muscular. She feels her face heat up, realizing her eyes are stuck to his body, but she can’t seem to drag them away.

Kylo turns, eyeing the blankets in her hand. “I don’t need blankets,” he says.

She shrugs, darting forward to sit them on the chair anyway. “If you’re stuck on the floor or couch, you can at least take blankets.”

“I’ve slept in a lot worse spots than this,” he replies, unconcerned.

Mara’s retreating, pulling herself away from a view that is entirely too tempting. “Right. Um, goodnight,” she says awkwardly, turning to leave the living room.

“Goodnight,” Kylo sighs.

She darts into her bedroom, heart pounding in her chest. She shuts the door, hoping it can at least block out the scent of Kylo, that maddeningly delicious smell. She can’t tell what it is, something masculine and woodsy, but she is quickly craving it. Almost as much as she craves the sight of him shirtless, something he seemed too prone to providing.

Could the spell be affecting her too? Was Erica right, was it the damiana? Or was Kylo right, and there was something inside of her calling to him? Something urging them both on, closer? Mara feels half crazy with the hormones rushing through her, combining with stress into something that’s sure to give her heart palpitations.

She tries to calm down, pulling a night gown out before her eyes widen at the sight of it. Short, tight, nope. Rethinking that, she pulls out shorts and a t-shirt to sleep in instead. She washes up quickly, brushing her teeth. Mara sets an alarm, after considering calling off work for a second day in a row. But she doesn’t want to mess up her reputation at work, and dutifully double checks that it’s set.

Then she turns out the lights, climbing into bed. For a few minutes, she is restless, her mind wanting to fixate on the huge amount of questions buzzing around it. For every answer she’d gotten, she felt like she only had a dozen more things to ask.

But quicker than she’d expected, Mara’s mind starts to shut down. Once it starts, she gives in happily to the pull of sleep. The thoughts are silenced, everything hushing down as her brain gives in to blissful nothing.

**The Next Morning**

It’s in those beginning moments of waking up, where her mind is struggling towards awareness, that Mara feels her arms are trapped. She moves, pulling at them, to no avail. But shortly thereafter, she realizes the pillow under her head is moving. Rising and falling.

Her eyes snap open, Kylo’s scent flooding her senses about the same time weak morning sunlight hits her pupils. She squints her eyes, her body overheated, and tries to move one of her arms again. She freezes when Kylo groans softly under her, releasing his grip of her arm. Though his other arm pulls tighter around her waist, urging her closer to him.

How had she ended up here? They’re on the floor in the living room, in a tangle of pillows and blankets. She doesn’t remember leaving her bed, not even a flash of the previous night.

Mara tries to keep her breaths small, but Kylo’s skin against her face is too appealing. Mara closes her eyes, gulping nervously. She fights the random urge to rub her face against his chest, to press her lips to him. A fantasy fills her mind, of climbing on top of him, straddling his hips. Arousal floods her body, and she realizes she’s woke up already turned on.

The fantasy changes as she imagines Kylo rolling her over, crushing her down underneath him. There’s a throb of pleasure between her thighs, and Mara moves to free herself from his arms. His grip doesn’t budge, however, and she struggles.

“Let go-Kylo! Let go,” she protests, wiggling.

Kylo groans, louder now, but his arms drop from her. She sits up, pulling herself away from his body, dragging one of the blankets with her.

He turns onto his side, one of his hands rising up to rub at his eyes tiredly. “I was behaving,” he grumbles.

“How did that happen?”

“You were sleepwalking again, I think,” Kylo answers, covering the huge yawn that pulls his mouth open for a moment. “You walked out here and dropped on top of me.”

Mara’s embarrassment is enough to heat her neck up as well as her cheeks, a scorching blush as she imagines the scene. She avoids meeting his eyes as he shoves himself up to a seated position. “You didn’t try to wake me up?” she asks.

“You know, I heard that you aren’t supposed to wake sleepwalkers,” Kylo replies, giving her a sleepy smirk. She rolls her eyes, preparing to make a smart remark. But Kylo’s face changes suddenly, stopping her before she can get the words out.

He turns his head towards the front door, expression becoming wary. He stands, turning his whole body towards the entrance to her home.

“…Kylo? What is it?” Mara asks, his odd behavior starting to alarm her.

But Kylo says nothing, striding to the front door to throw it open. She stares, disturbed to see what looks like red paint on her door. It’s dripped down in some places, running before it had the chance to dry. But it’s marking a symbol, branding the door to her home with a large hexagon. Inside the hexagon, a circle is filled with lines that point in, like the spokes of a wheel.

“What is that!?” she gasps, standing up to move closer.

Kylo is frozen, staring at it, his hands curling into fists. When he finally answers her, his voice is so low she barely hears him. “The First Order.”

“Huh?” Mara searches his face, sees the way his muscles are clenching in rage. What is he talking about? Who put that on her door?

Kylo turns, striding to her quickly. He snags her arm, pulling her back from the door. “We’re getting out of here. Now.”


	8. Chapter 8

Mara pulls her arm free from Kylo’s grasp, confused at why his mood has turned so swiftly. His expression is furious, his eyes wide enough to even suggest fear. She looks back at the red symbol on her door. The paint looks like it is still tacky, perhaps not entirely dry. Though it is creepy, she can’t understand what about it would make him afraid. What must it represent, to intimidate a man like Kylo?

Mara gestures at it questioningly. “I don’t understand, what is the First Order?”

But Kylo’s eyes have landed on her suitcase and duffel bag. She hadn’t gotten a chance to unpack them yet, leaving them sitting by the door. “Grab anything you need that isn’t in these, you’ve got five minutes,” he orders.

She stares at him, mouth falling open with confusion. Kylo shoves his boots on, before shrugging on the flannel shirt. He grabs her bags and hauls them out the door. She hurries to put her own shoes on, following him across her lawn. “Kylo! Wait!” she calls, practically running to catch him.

She’s surprised when he storms right passed her car, headed towards his truck. “Kylo, stop!” she tries again. “What are you doing? I’m not leaving because of some graffiti on my door!”

He ignores her, opening the back door of the extended cab and depositing both her bags on the backseat. “I’m getting you out of here,” Kylo growls, spinning around to face her. “Last chance, is there anything else you need?”

His eyes are wild, his hair a ruffled mess, jaw set. She staggers back a step, alarmed by how worked up he looks. Mara fumbles for a response, unable to find words. He can’t honestly be expecting her to just take off with him? What the hell is going on?

“I need to know what has you so freaked out!” she manages to spit out. “What is the First Order!? Who put that on my door?”

“I don’t know who put it there, but it’s a warning,” Kylo snaps. He turns his head sharply to the side, his eyes sliding away from hers and towards the road. When he looks back, his gaze has darkened ominously. He takes a step towards her.

“Get in the truck, Mara,” he orders.

“No!” she exclaims, voice incredulous. “No, not until you explain-”

“We don’t have time, _get into the truck!”_

Kylo raises his voice, and she flinches. It’s there again, that feeling like a twisting, deep-seated heat. It’s in response to something in his tone, his voice taking on some strange power over her body. She’d felt it the night before, when he ordered her into his house. It’s even stronger now, an urge to listen to him.

Mara shakes her head, trying to force her legs to back up. She isn’t going anywhere with him, not when he’s acting completely irrational. But she’s frozen in place, torn by that strange desire to obey him that conflicts with her will.

She hears it then, the sound Kylo must have already detected. Car tires on gravel, getting louder. Someone’s coming down the road.

Kylo gives a frustrated growl, lunging for her. She tries to dart away, but her reflexes aren’t as quick as Kylo. Mara only makes it a few steps before he snags her, hauling her backwards off her feet. “Stop it! Kylo, what the fuck, stop it!” she protests loudly.

He’s pulling her back towards the truck, ignoring her shouts, and panic kicks into her brain. Is he really about to abduct her?

Mara starts flailing, kicking her legs and pounding her fists into his arms. His arms feel so solid wrapped around her, her blows are useless against him. “KYLO! Please, stop!” she sobs out, desperately wiggling in his grasp. His behavior is scaring her, pushing her mind beyond reason as she struggles harder.

“You don’t understand,” Kylo growls impatiently, lifting her higher when she tries to drag him down towards the ground.

She only succeeds in throwing his balance off when he attempts to wrench open the passenger door of the truck. He shifts forward to recover, allowing her feet to find the ground again. She pushes off, throwing her weight back into him as forcefully as she can. She almost wrestles free from him for one fleeting moment. Mara catches sight of a sheriff’s car passed Kylo’s shoulder, pulling onto his driveway.

Kylo snags her arms, restraining her easily, and Mara cries out in frustration. Gravel goes flying as the police car brakes hard, and she feels Kylo freeze. She can’t see beyond his chest, but she hears the car door slam shut.

“Let go of her, get your hands up in the air!”

Mara recognizes Officer Dameron’s voice with relief, even as Kylo’s hands hang onto her stubbornly. She looks up, confused tears escaping her eyes, to see his face. He looks distraught, his eyes wrought with desperation.

“You have to leave town. Mara, you have to get out of here,” Kylo insists, breathing hard.

“Let go of her! Get your hands in the air! NOW!” Dameron shouts.

Kylo’s hands drop from her, and he hesitates before slowly raising them up, fingers splayed. But his eyes stay locked on her.

“They’re coming, or they’re already here,” Kylo says urgently. Mara sees a second police car turn onto the driveway, lights flashing. Her brain barely registers it, however, stuck on what Kylo is saying. Who’s coming? The First Order?

“Back away from her, keep your hands in the air!”

Kylo obeys, pacing back. It gives her enough room to now see Dameron behind him, gun levelled at Kylo’s back. Beyond him, another deputy jumps out of the second car and rushes up the driveway. “They’ll kill you, or worse. You have to get out of here,” Kylo says. “Please, please, Mara-”

He’s cut off when the deputy grabs his hands, pulling them behind his back to slam him onto the hood of the truck. Though he scowls, Kylo doesn’t resist. He cranes his head to keep his eyes on her, and she registers that Officer Dameron is speaking. But she doesn’t hear him, too focused on the brown of Kylo’s irises, where something red shimmers. It’s pulling her in, the dancing red makes her instincts stir.

“ _Run, Mara,_ ” Kylo orders, voice low.

Her muscles twitch and jump with the need to obey him, her heartbeat accelerating as if preparing to take off. It takes every bit of self-control to fight her body, to battle against that urge to listen to his command and flee.

The deputy stands Kylo up, hands secured in the cuffs behind his back. He holds her eyes until the officer turns him, forcing him back towards one of the waiting cars. Kylo practically has to crumple himself in half to fit through the door into the back of the cruiser. Something clenches painfully in her chest when he disappears from view.

Mara’s left next to his truck, and she ends up leaning against the side of it, trembling. Adrenaline has flooded her system, her energy so amped up that she feels like she’s vibrating. She stares out at the trees beyond the scene, a blur of green, wavering in the wind. Her eyes don’t want to focus, stale fear scrambling her thoughts.

Why had the police shown up for Kylo? Why was he acting like he lost his mind? She realizes maybe she should listen to him, and leave. For him to be acting like this, surely it meant something bad? But should she be trusting him? She barely knows him, despite whatever she feels. Her thinking fails to reassure her, as her body is practically screaming for action. _Run._

“Mara?”

She jumps at the sound of Dameron’s voice, tearing her gaze away from the woods. He’s hovering in front of her, face concerned.

“Are you okay? Did he hurt you?” the deputy asks.

Mara shakes her head. “No. He didn’t hurt me. Where are you taking him?” Her eyes trail the cruiser as it backs down the driveway, and out into the narrow road.

“The station. I was coming out to take him in for questioning. Guess we had good timing,” he replies, voice tense. “What happened?”

She just shakes her head again, unsure how to explain. She is reluctant to say anything against Kylo, despite how terrified he’d made her. She needs him, doesn’t she? The thought of more wolves like the gray one, ready and waiting to take her, makes her eyes flit back to the trees. She searches them, her breath catching with renewed fear. What else was out there?

“Nothing,” she forces out. “I know it looked bad-”

“It looked like he was overpowering you,” Dameron argues, voice full of disbelief.

“No,” Mara insists. Her eyes leave the trees, trailing over towards her house to land on her front door. The red symbol is clear in the morning sun, and she clenches her fists with anxiety. Every moment, more fear is creeping into her at the unknown.

There’s a shiver in her spine, something nearly painful. Why isn’t she listening to Kylo? He told her to leave town, every frantic instinct in her body wants to do just that. _Run._ Her head starts aching, a dull throbbing.

“Mara-“

“It wasn’t that, really,” she says, but she can’t seem to think straight long enough to come up with an alternate explanation. “I’m sorry, I should have said something sooner, I was being stupid.”

Dameron’s eyebrows creep higher, his eyes clearly communicating that he doesn’t believe her. He forces his expression into something more controlled, his voice dropping to a patient tone. “It looked like your neighbor, who you told me you barely know, was forcing you into his vehicle. And you were struggling to get away from him.”

“I-I know him a little better, now,” she replies weakly. Dameron’s cool stare is his only response. “How long will you have him? I mean if I’m not pressing charges or anything, you’ll release him, right?” she presses anxiously.

The deputy shakes his head. “It’s not that simple. We’ve got a lot to discuss about your neighbor.”

**Later That Morning**

Mara sits on one of the chairs in front of Dameron’s desk, trying not to pick at the faded upholstery. She’d gotten dressed and grabbed her things in a hurry, not wanting to keep the deputy waiting on her. She called work while he drove them to the station, letting her supervisor know she wouldn’t be in again.

Mara feels like a ball of anxiety, her headache now developed into a full throbbing. She pulls her fingers from the torn fabric near her thigh, and fiddles with her phone instead. She’s tempted to message Erica or Nicole. But she doesn’t, unsure where to even begin with filling her friends in.

She pushes the phone back into her pocket, looking around the station. Her feet shake where she’s crossed them under the chair, as she observes the two other officers. They’re both working at their desks, distracted. She doesn’t see the one who had handcuffed Kylo, and so her eyes keep searching. Is he with Kylo? She doesn’t know where they are holding him, but Mara is nearly certain he’s in the building.

“Sorry it took me a minute,” Dameron apologizes, coming around the desk. He sits a cup of coffee down in front of her. “I made a fresh pot.”

She murmurs a thanks, reaching out to wrap her fingers around it. Dameron sips from his cup, before sitting it down with a sigh.

“I guess to start out, Mara…I want to reassure you, that you don’t have to be afraid of Kylo Ren,” he says carefully. “If that’s why you don’t want to tell me what happened, I mean.”

“I’m not afraid of Kylo…” Mara says nervously. She takes a sip of the coffee, only to make a face as it mixes unpleasantly with the mint in her mouth. She’d rushed brushing her teeth, and the toothpaste does not compliment the beverage.

“Alright. I just want to make sure you know that you can speak up. We can protect you,” Dameron insists, shuffling aside folders on his desk.

She watches as he seems to grow more annoyed with the mess on top of his desk, before finally grabbing up the file he must be searching for. He opens it, turning it around to lay down in front of her. Mara leans forward when the picture catches her attention.

It’s a picture of Kylo, though he looks to be a lot younger. She scans the document for a date, only to frown with confusion at the name printed beside his photo. “Ben Solo?” she asks.

“It’s his birth name,” Dameron confirms. “He’s been using the alias Kylo Ren since he was a teen.”

“…I don’t understand,” Mara admits. “Why is he using an alias?”

The officer reaches forward to shut the file. “Probably because he’s been in a lot of trouble with the law. It’s what caught my attention, he’s got a rap sheet a mile long.”

Mara’s mouth falls open. “What!? What for?”

“Most of it is older stuff that’s pretty typical for a runaway kid. Breaking and entering, vandalism, petty theft… Some is a little worse.” Dameron’s eyes are scanning her, reading her reaction.

Mara forces herself to take a deep breath, sitting back in the uncomfortable chair. She’d woken up that morning on top of a criminal. Worst yet, if she was really being honest with herself… it had felt good, being close to Kylo like that. She shakes her head, trying in vain to dispel the conflict she’s feeling. “Why are you telling me this?” she asks.

“So you know exactly who it is we’re dealing with, here,” Dameron replies. “I don’t know if you’re protecting him, or scared of him. But your neighbor’s not a good guy. Especially not when I looked a little deeper into his history.”

Mara furrows her brow, her heart sinking.

“Ben Solo’s father died, almost ten years ago. I was curious, especially since cause of death was ruled an animal attack,” he continues. “Autopsy report says Han Solo’s chest and abdomen were torn open, his throat slashed. He bled out in a matter of seconds.”

She sits the coffee cup down, her hands shaking too much to continue holding on to it. She feels sick to her stomach, swallowing down a wave of nausea.

Dameron’s gaze doesn’t relent, as he watches her from across the desk. “Does that sound familiar to you?” he asks quietly.

Mara lets her eyes dart up to his. His eyebrows are in a stern line, the rest of his face unreadable. She swallows hard. “You…You think Kylo…?”

“I do,” he confirms.

She shrinks under his scrutiny, hating every moment of silence that begins to pass between them. He’s waiting for her to break, to start talking. But she doesn’t know what to say. Is it possible Kylo could do something like that? Could he kill his own father?

“Hey, uh, we got some visitors,” one of the deputies near the front of the station announces, looking towards the door. His desk is nearest the entrance, the frosted front window behind his chair. 

He stands up, pacing towards the door to look outside, face curious. “I think the Men in Black might be here,” he jokes.

Dameron stands, looking confused. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t know, man, a bunch of blacked out cars just pulled in the lot,” he replies, shoving the door open.

“Wait a sec-” Dameron tries to halt his colleague, but the man steps outside, calling out towards the parking lot. Mara can’t make out what he’s saying.

The other deputy Mara doesn’t know shifts in his seat, looking thoughtful. “Could be the bureau? Maybe they got something on our weird death.”

Officer Dameron says nothing, his face uneasy. He starts towards the door, and she notices the way his hand reaches back. It hovers over his holster, and chills race up Mara’s spine. She stands up, already edging away from the front of the station. Something feels wrong, and Dameron must sense it too.

Her hair stands on end when she hears the growl, reverberating from somewhere far back in the building.

“Kylo,” she breathes out. Mara’s heart speeds up as she knows, somehow, that he’s warning her. _Run._ She backs into the corner of a filing cabinet, not looking where she’s going, and stumbles around it. Her eyes are fixated on the door, as Dameron steps closer to it, hand resting on his weapon. 

For one moment, there is a thick silence in the air. Then, it is interrupted by the unmistakable noise of a gunshot. Blood splatters on the frosted glass, a second before a dark shape collides with the window. It slumps down, dragging the blood into a messy smear before disappearing below the pane. The deputy still at his desk bolts to his feet, grabbing for his weapon. Dameron shouts from the front, gun trained on the door.

“Call for backup, now! Anyone on patrol, everyone available!”

Glass shatters, a moment before someone opens fire. The receptionist, eyes wide in terror, dives from her seat. She takes the phone with her, swiping it down off the desk and cowering. Dameron is still yelling, the other deputy is shouting into his radio. Mara hears her name, but it doesn’t matter. She’s already retreating, starting down a hallway without a destination in mind. She just wants to get away, escape her only goal.

Mara flinches at a loud bang, her vision flashing bright for a moment. She stumbles, disoriented, her ears ringing. But she doesn’t let it stop her, forcing herself down the hallway, passed locker rooms and locked doors. As soon as the ringing in her ears starts to clear, she hears more gunfire. Some of it is different, louder.

There’s some kind of smoke filling the air, and she chokes on it, coughing. It’s stinging her eyes. The receptionist’s strangled screams come from the front, as she wails in terror. Mara throws herself into one of the last rooms off the hallway, an office.

She slams the door shut, fumbling to lock it. Then she backs away, recoiling from the gunshots that still periodically assault her eardrums. Can she get out? She turns, searching the wall of the office. The windows are narrow, and situated high on the wall. She won’t be able to crawl through them. A strange noise leaves her throat, before another loud bang shakes the walls.

Mara’s eyes fall to the desk and she shoves the chair out of the way, crawling underneath in a pitiful attempt at hiding. Her breathing is loud, rasping. She shoves a hand over her mouth, digging her fingers into her cheek. She knows whoever is attacking the station has come for her. Knows it deep down, and knows that hiding won’t work for long. But she’s paralyzed with fear, sobs catching in her chest. She doesn’t know what to do, and so she cowers.

Something collides, hard, with the office door. There’s a splintering crack, and it gives way. Mara freezes, barely daring to breathe, at the sound of hurried footsteps entering the office. Just on the other side of the desk, they come to a stop.


	9. Chapter 9

“MARA!”

Her hand falls away from her mouth at the sound of Kylo’s voice, calling for her. “Kylo!” she cries out. She barely has a chance to crawl out from under the desk before he’s there, pulling her upright.

“They’re here for me-aren’t they?” Mara gasps, babbling in a panic. “What’s happening-how can they attack the police-I don’t-”

She stutters to a stop when Kylo traps her face between his hands, a low growl issuing from his throat. She looks up, met with bright red eyes. Whatever questions had been ping-ponging around her brain fall away, and she grabs onto his wrists desperately.

“You do everything I say,” Kylo orders. “ _Everything_. Do you understand?”

Mara nods mutely, clinging onto him. She feels useless, her mind drowning in the turbulence of shock as gunfire continues carrying down the hallway.

“Stay close to me.” The red leaves her vision, but Kylo’s hand encircles her forearm, pulling her across the office.

Mara stumbles stepping through the remains of the office door. It’s shredded apart into jagged shards of wood. The hallway is thick with smoke, it’s much more clouded than the office had been. Her eyes tear up immediately, stinging painfully.

Kylo’s already pulling her down the hallway, and she struggles to move her legs fast enough to keep up. Down another, shorter hallway, and there is a break in the commotion from the front of the station. There is a sound of distant sirens, lots of them, and what she thinks might be Dameron’s voice yelling.

Kylo pulls her through another doorway, and she nearly steps on a fallen officer. He’s crumpled on the floor, a thin trail of blood leaking down his forehead from where it looks like a goose egg is already growing. She hesitates, but Kylo doesn’t let her stop.

“Move, Mara!” He tugs at her arm and she has to step over the man, stumbling passed a row of three holding cells. The third is hanging open, the bars of the door bent. The entire metal panel that holds the locking mechanism is twisted, distorted from being forced open.

Kylo leads her to the door at the rear of the building, not pausing before he throws it open. The doorway is blocked by a man wearing all black, he turns quickly at the sound of it opening. Mara barely glimpses the gun in his hand before he moves to aim it at Kylo’s face.

Kylo reacts a second too fast for the man, shoving his arm upwards. The gun fires off target, hitting somewhere on the ceiling. Mara screams, recoiling back from the pair, but the struggle is short lived. There’s a sickening crack when Kylo snaps the man’s arm in a way she’s never seen an arm bend before.

Kylo relieves him of the weapon easily, and she looks away a moment too late. She sees it when he fires, and the gory aftermath. Bile burns her throat as her stomach threatens to empty its contents. Kylo had aimed for the head, the man’s torso clad in a bulletproof vest.

Kylo pulls her roughly through the door. She nearly loses her battle against nausea as her foot slides in blood. The scent of it strikes her, harsh and metallic. It makes the nausea stop immediately, replaced by something disturbingly close to excitement. It makes no sense to her, but Mara breathes deeper on instinct. The iron smell hazes over her brain, numbing her panic, focusing her senses.

“Keep up,” Kylo growls. He urges her along as they emerge into the alley behind the station. Harsh sunlight strikes her eyes, the sun now perfectly overhead. She blinks against it, struggling to think coherently.

Kylo is leading them towards a police car, parked not far away. The legs of an officer are visible on the ground behind the car. He doesn’t look to be moving, both his black shoes motionless next to one of the front tires.

They’re almost to the car when tires squeal behind them. Mara spins around. A black sedan is pulling into the end of the alley, identical to the one the supposed marshal drove. It comes to a stop, and for a moment she stares stupidly at the dark tinted windows.

Kylo shoves her backwards. “Get behind the car! Now!”

She runs the last few steps, cringing when Kylo uses the handgun he’d taken to open fire on the black car. She dives behind the sheriff’s vehicle, met with a metallic ding when a bullet collides with the hood. Someone is shooting back.

Mara cowers, trying not to look at the fallen officer’s body. He’s only a few inches away from one of her feet, laying facedown. There’s too much blood around him. The smell of it floods her brain. She can detect it too strongly, it’s overpowering. Kylo swears before he joins her, hunched in back of their only cover.

“It’s out,” he grunts.

Mara is staring, not comprehending. What’s out?

Her eyes fall to the officer for the second time, as Kylo checks the holster on him without luck. His weapon is missing.

She cries out when more bullets collide with the car, and Kylo pushes her down further. For a moment she’s crowded underneath him, shaking against his chest. But then silence falls, the onslaught stopping as suddenly as it started. Kylo’s arms leave her, he takes a harsh intake of breath. “This is about to be a cluster fuck,” he mutters.

Mara doesn’t understand what he’s talking about, she doesn’t understand anything. Are these hunters? Do they think she’s a werewolf? Why would they do this, just for her? She grabs onto Kylo, like a drowning man might cling to a life preserver, terrified.

“Kylo…?” she gasps, voice pitiful.

Something roars, so loudly it is shaking the metal of the car against her back. It’s a primal noise, full of rage. She can’t tell where it’s coming from, but it sounds near. Kylo pulls her hands off of him. “Stay down,” he orders.

Mara sobs when he pulls away from her, rising up to peak in the window of the police car. “Watch out,” Kylo warns.

She flinches away when he smashes his arm into the glass, shattering the window. Gunshots meet her ears again, but they aren’t dinging off the car this time. What are they shooting at now, if not her and Kylo?

Kylo reaches through the broken window. Her shock only grows when he pulls a rifle out of the car they’re crowded behind, slamming a magazine into the bottom. “See if the keys are on his body,” he instructs her. 

Mara looks to the dead officer at her feet, understanding what he wants her to do. She reaches out, reluctant at the thought of rolling his corpse over. But she’s distracted when there is another animalistic roar, and Kylo stands. He shoulders the rifle, dropping his head down to the sight.

Mara dares to peek up through the broken window, to see what is happening. The black car is still at the end of the alley, the passenger door held open. Someone’s crouched behind it, someone else visible in the driver’s seat. She can’t make out much more of the assailants, but they still aren’t firing towards her and Kylo. Rather, she sees a shower of dust and stone as a bullet clips the top edge of the building. They’re shooting up, aiming at the roof of the sheriff’s station.

Mara shifts her eyes up, just in time to see something massive hurtle itself downwards, leaping from the roof. It slams onto the top of the black car, and the metal gives way underneath its heavy body. The windows shatter, the space inside the car rapidly reduced as the roof collapses underneath the weight.

Whoever was hiding behind the passenger door stands, and Kylo fires. The man drops. The beast on the car turns to survey them, and Mara chokes on her scream. It’s another werewolf, its face hideously scarred and snarling. It’s dark brown or black, she can’t tell. Its red eyes are focused directly on her, and for a moment she can’t move.

But then someone tries to extricate themselves from the driver side, crawling out of the shattered window. The beast’s attention shifts, the red eyes pulling away. It snaps its jaws down onto the man crawling from the wrecked car, ripping him out forcefully. The wolf’s mouth covers the man’s entire head and part of his shoulders, before it hurls him sideways. He collides with the brick wall of the alleyway too hard. He falls into a broken heap.

The wolf takes a step down onto the hood of the black car, the metal creaking and denting beneath its paw. Mara can’t breathe as its eyes lock back onto hers, lips curling back in a snarl. She can see its fangs, even from this far away.

“ _KEYS, MARA!_ ” Kylo roars at her, firing again. This time he’s aiming for the wolf.

Mara scrambles to roll the officer’s body over, grabbing at his shirt without aim. She spots his key ring, attached to his heavy utility belt. Her fingers are sticky with his drying blood as she fumbles with the keychain. The sound of Kylo repeatedly firing the rifle hurts her ears, loud enough that it feels like it’s stabbing into her eardrums.

“I have them!” she cries out when she pulls the keys free. She looks up at the wolf barreling towards them. A well-placed shot strikes it in the throat, and it stumbles.

Kylo lets the weapon drop from his shoulder, snatching the keychain from her hand. He yanks open the door, sliding across into the driver’s seat. Mara stares at the wolf, pulling itself up from the pavement. Blood drips in a steady pace from its neck, but it isn’t stopping.

“Get in the fucking car!”

Kylo reaches out to snatch her arm, tugging her after him into the passenger side. She yanks the door closed as Kylo turns the keys in the ignition, throwing the car into reverse. They’re accelerating backwards down the alley as the wolf lumbers towards them. Its pace increases, despite the blood still trailing from its wounds. It somehow seems to be recovering already.

“Hang on,” Kylo growls. Mara looks over, but his eyes are focused on the rearview mirror. “Fuck!”

She turns her head to see what he’s swearing at. There’s another black car, pulling up behind them. They’re stuck, between the wolf bearing down on them and another one of the tinted cars.

Kylo hits the gas pedal hard, twisting the steering wheel, and Mara tries to brace herself. They slam into the black car, the impact jarring her. She cries out when Kylo grabs her hair roughly. He forces her head down, a second before the back window of the car shatters with a gunshot.

“Stay down!” Kylo orders, and she complies, smashing herself as low in the seat as possible.

He switches gears, trying to pull away from the collision. But the wolf isn’t giving up. There’s a horrendous screech as it lunges for their car. Its claws catch in the metal, ripping, before more gunshots sound. Mara's head is screaming in pain, her heart pounding hard enough that she can hear her blood rushing in her eardrums. 

Kylo’s speeding up, pushing the car to accelerate as fast as possible. She dares to look back, out of the broken rear window. There’s a dazzle of red and blue lights down the street, in front of the sheriff’s station. They turn a corner, leaving behind the sight of the monstrous wolf, staggering into broad daylight. 

“Are you hurt!?”

Mara turns back around, staring at Kylo in shock. He’s surveying her, his eyes flitting between her body and the road. Words don’t want to form, her brain absolutely stunned.

“Are you hurt!? Mara!?” Kylo asks again. He grabs her hand, pulling her slightly as if he can shake her out of her daze.

“N-no,” she stammers out.

She recognizes the road they’re on. He’s headed towards the highway, the road out of town. But she spots the black car parked on the side of the road, at the last intersection before the on-ramp. It’s the same as the others, a large sedan, tinted windows. Kylo’s hand tenses on hers, as he sees it too.

As they get closer to the car, the driver’s side door opens. A man steps out, and she instantly recognizes him. Tall, reddish brown hair, bearded face. The fake marshal.

Kylo pushes the car even faster, and they shoot by the man. But Armitage Hux does nothing. He doesn’t shoot at them, he doesn’t even raise a weapon. He just watches.

Mara lets herself collapse down into the seat, trying to shrink away from reality. Her dazed eyes fall to Kylo’s hand on hers, still gripping tightly. The metal of the broken handcuff dangles around his wrist like an ugly bracelet. One link of the snapped chain hangs on uselessly.

**Later**

They left the battered police cruiser half off the road between their properties, not bothering to hide it. Kylo had tossed the keys back into it, after fumbling with them to get the remains of the handcuffs from his wrists. Mara doesn’t know how long they’ve been driving, the freeway vibrating beneath the tires of his truck. She doesn’t even remember getting into his vehicle. Though, she vaguely remembers Kylo leaning over her to buckle her seatbelt.

She’s in a daze, staring without seeing. All of the frantic thoughts that had been flying around her brain are hushed, smothered down. She only notices what is going on when the truck slows down suddenly, coming to a stop.

Mara looks up, her eyes landing on picnic tables arranged around a small pond. The trees beyond the manicured little area are bright with afternoon sun.

“W-where are we?” she murmurs, pushing herself up straighter in the seat. She turns to look out the passenger window, spotting a building in the distance. They’ve parked as far from it as possible, tucked around the side from the main lot.

“A rest stop,” Kylo explains, reaching over to release her seatbelt.

“Why did we stop? What if they’re following us?” she asks, craning to look towards the other vehicles in the lot. She doesn’t spot any of the tell-tale black sedans, but her heart is already pounding at the thought.

“I haven’t seen anyone following us. We’ve gone pretty far, I figured we could spare a few minutes to stop,” Kylo says, his deep voice soft.

“Why?”

“Mara…” The sound of her name finally pulls her eyes away from the parking lot. She looks at Kylo. His expression is concerned, his eyes search hers a moment. “You’ve been staring at your hands for an hour. I think you might be in shock…”

Her eyes well up with tears immediately, but she shakes her head. “Shock? Why would I be in shock?”

She means it to come out sarcastically, some demented attempt at a joke. But her voice stammers and breaks with a sob. Even acknowledging what just happened seems to be too much. The wolves had been terrifying enough, but this new threat… They had just laid siege to an entire police station. What are her chances of surviving?

The sobs tear free from her chest. They're ugly noises that she tries to muffle with hands over her mouth. Kylo shifts closer, pulling her against his side. She hides her face against his shoulder, gasping for air around her strangled crying. It’s like all of the fear she’d just experienced is ripping itself free, in each shuddering sob.

Kylo is silent, holding her. She tries to stop herself. “Was-was that the First Order?” Mara asks.

“Yes.” Kylo’s arms tighten around her. “It’s going to be okay…”

“No, it’s not,” she whispers, voice hoarse. “It’s not fucking okay…”

“We got away,” Kylo says firmly. “You’re safe, and I’m going to make sure you stay that way. You hear me?”

Her shoulders shake as she tries to calm herself, nodding. She needs to think clearly, if she wants to have the best chance at making it to another day. Right now that means she can’t let herself fall apart. Mara tries to wall the emotions back up and stave off the inevitable breakdown. Her eyes are burning badly, irritated from the smoke inside the station and her tears.

She allows herself a few more minutes against Kylo’s chest, focusing on the rhythm of his breathing to slow her own. The closeness to him is soothing, and she’s reluctant to pull away. But she realizes with embarrassment that her nose is running. Her whole face is now sticky with tears and sweat and snot. Ridiculously, it seems to be that realization that allows her to finally regain control of herself.

“I’m so sorry, I’m getting snot all over your shirt,” she admits, pulling back from him. She tries to wipe her face clean.

Kylo just laughs, a soft little sound. “I don’t care.”

Mara hesitates to look up, but when she does, she finds him watching her. His eyes are gentle, warm. She feels a rush of gratitude towards him. She wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for him.

Kylo’s gaze pulls away from her, and he shifts to reach for the door handle. “Come on. Let’s hurry up and get out of here.”

He steps out of the truck, and Mara takes a moment to try to wipe her face clean again. Her eyes don’t seem to want to stop tearing up, however, so she gives up. Kylo takes her hand as she awkwardly hops down from the seat. She’s surprised when he keeps it, leading her towards the rest stop.

They split up at the restrooms, and Mara ignores the concerned look a woman gives her as she enters the women’s side. But when she goes to wash her hands in the sink, she understands why the woman had looked alarmed. Her face in the mirror is not pretty. Her eyes are red and puffy, nearly swollen looking. Even her nose has turned bright red, the skin of her face splotchy.

Mara takes time to splash copious amounts of cold water onto her face, hoping it will help. She dries off with scratchy paper towels before emerging to find Kylo.

She doesn’t have to search for long. He’s waiting for her near the bank of vending machines. He holds out a bottle of water, and she murmurs a thanks as she takes it. Then he’s ushering her back outside, his arm around her shoulders to steer her through the other travelers.

They break free of the crowd as they approach the truck. Nearly no one is on this side of the rest stop, save for a woman playing with her dog near the picnic tables.

Mara feels her phone vibrate in her pocket, and she hurries to pull it out. She’d nearly forgotten she had it on her, and a quick glance at the screen shows numerous missed calls from Erica. She unlocks it, scrolling quickly through texts. News of what happened at the station must be spreading, and she can see Erica’s alarm growing in the messages she sent.

Mara shuffles the water to the crook of her arm, beginning to type a text back to her friend. She’s interrupted, however, when Kylo yanks the phone loose from her hand. She makes a noise of protest, only to fall silent when he throws it.

Her phone arcs in the air, coming down with a splash into the pond he’d apparently aimed for. The woman playing with her dog looks from the pond over to them, seeming confused.

Mara stares at the pond, the surface still rippling from the disturbance. “That was an iPhone,” she says weakly.

“We’ll get you another phone, one that isn’t in your name,” Kylo replies, shrugging.

She turns toward him, giving him a look of disbelief. Kylo’s gaze is unconcerned, and he holds out one of the snacks he’d gotten from the vending machine. “Pretzels?”

Mara continues staring at him. Somehow his innocent offer of a snack seems incredulous in the face of everything that’s already happened in the day. Her entire life is disintegrating before her eyes, her only coping mechanism to currently ignore the too fresh memory of dead bodies and gunfire. She won’t even be functional if she allows herself to think at all. But somehow, it’s the pretzels that sets her off.

“Fuck everything,” she huffs, passing him to stomp towards the truck.

They leave the rest stop, merging back onto the freeway that heads away from the city. Mara stares out the window, trying to hold her tongue until she can’t anymore. She whirls towards him.

“I’m sorry, how are you doing this right now?”

Kylo pauses, eyes on the road. One hand is on the steering wheel, the other sunk into the bag of pretzels. “Doing what?”

“We’re fleeing for our lives, and you’re… you’re casually, fucking snacking, like this is…some sort of road trip!?” she rants, her voice wavering near hysterical tones.

Kylo shrugs slightly, his eyes flitting to his mirrors before he changes lanes to pass a minivan. “I’m hungry,” he says, as if that explains it all. She’s struggling to fathom how he’s so unaffected seeming, when she’s barely hanging onto sanity.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful that you’re handling this better than me. I have no doubt I’d be dead right now if it weren’t for you,” Mara tries to explain. “But how are you not panicking right now? Because I feel like my heart is about to explode.”

“First of all, you need to eat something. Your blood sugar is probably dropping after the adrenaline rush,” Kylo points out. “Secondly, this is kind of just…how life is, for me.”

“You’re kidding me. Life is just shoot outs and snapping people’s arms in half?” she rebuts, voice incredulous. She forces herself to take a handful of pretzels, mechanically chewing them.

“Life is running or hiding,” Kylo corrects. “I thought maybe it was all over, but I guess they’re back… The First Order…They come after people like us. Anything supernatural.”

Her mouth is dry, she has to keep sipping the water to get the food down. “How are they not all over the news? Attacking a bunch of police like that…” she muses, but regrets the line of thought. The memory of rolling over the dead deputy, pulling keys sticky with blood from his body makes the food toss in her stomach.

“They’re normally a lot more subtle,” Kylo replies. “I guess they really want you…”

“What the fuck for?” Mara chokes out.

Kylo’s eyes are sympathetic, darting over to give her an apologetic look. “I don’t know…”


	10. Chapter 10

They only stop twice by nightfall. Once to get gas and food, and the second time to pull into a place to stay for the night. Kylo pulls the keys from the ignition and reaches into the glove compartment. He removes his wallet and a plain white envelope.

She watches, half curious, as he stretches into the backseat to tuck the envelope into a large duffle. She’d noticed his bag earlier, buried beneath hers, but hadn’t asked anything then. Now she can’t help but question it.

“Were you planning on this?” Mara asks skeptically. “You already had a packed bag in your truck…”

Kylo sighs, zipping the bag closed once more and turning back in his seat. “I always have a packed bag. Running or hiding, remember?”

“Oh…” Mara stares off, across the dark parking lot. The hotel they’ve pulled into is back off the highway, surrounded by nicely maintained lawns and flower beds. But passed that the trees begin, wooded areas that she stares into. Her mind supplies the image of the wolf from earlier, and she pictures it waiting just passed the warm glow of the parking lot lamps.

Were there more? Could she ever get away from them? Or was her fate inevitable? She wonders why Kylo seems so different from the other werewolves. The others had come after her like feral monsters, relentless, uncaring if they terrified her. Why was Kylo helping her instead? 

“Let’s get a room for the night. We’re going to need to take off early,” Kylo suggests, swinging his door open.

Mara nods, fumbling to find the door handle before climbing down from his vehicle. The air smells humid, like rain just waiting to fall. The moon and stars are blocked out, the night sky hidden behind dark clouds.

She protests when she notices Kylo already pulling her bags from the back. “I can carry my own stuff…”

“This suitcase weighs more than you,” Kylo remarks.

“I can handle it,” Mara insists, tugging obstinately at the handle. Kylo shrugs her duffle bag down off his shoulder, holding it out to her instead. She takes it, accepting the compromise.

They head into the hotel lobby. Mara hangs back by the little seating area while Kylo approaches the front desk. Her mind is jittery, unable to settle or think clearly. Her eyes keep darting from the oddly shaped sofa to the art on the wall, to some weird misshapen vase on the front desk. Why do chain hotels always have the weirdest décor in their lobbies? She huffs at the fact that she’s even pondering such a thing. Her mind feels like a scrambled egg, fixating on anything meaningless it can find.

Mara drifts closer to the desk with impatience, hoping they’ll be able to get a room. The parking lot hadn’t looked full, surely there is something open.

“And here’s your room key,” the man at the desk passes a little envelope over. “I hope you enjoy your stay, Mr. Zimmerman. Please don’t hesitate to call down if you need anything.”

“Thank you.” Kylo takes it, before leading Mara towards the elevator. He ignores her questioning stare.

She waits until the elevator door slides shut to ask, “Who is Mr. Zimmerman?”

“I’m Mr. Zimmerman.”

She stares at his profile suspiciously. Is he using someone’s credit card? What if the card gets reported stolen? It seems like a dangerous move, and not altogether necessary. Surely the First Order wouldn’t be able to know if she’d used her own credit card?

Kylo finally looks away from the numbers by the door of the elevator, his eyes sliding over to meet hers. He winks, as the door slides open.

Mara follows him out, down the hallway. “I’m not okay with defrauding some poor guy-”

“I’m not defrauding some guy,” Kylo cuts her off, stopping by the room that must be theirs for the night. He holds up the plastic key card, and there’s a click as the door unlocks.

She steps in behind him, searching for the switch to turn on the lights as the door swings closed. “Okay, but I know that Zimmerman isn’t your real name. It’s Ben Solo.”

Kylo drops their bags onto the little loveseat by the bed. When he turns around to face her, his demeanor has changed. He looks tense, expression guarded. “Did the cop tell you that?”

“Yes,” Mara admits.

“What else did he tell you?” he demands.

She searches Kylo’s face, not liking the edge of anger to his features. It suggests he’d rather she didn’t know that fact about him. Was he planning on hiding his real name from her? What else was he hiding? A criminal record, a father who died under suspicious circumstances…

Nothing she learned about Kylo was reassuring, and yet she was stuck. She had to rely on him for help, not knowing where else to turn. And there was that intuitive urge, the one she kept stuffing back down and trying to ignore. It told her to trust him, despite every logical argument she could make to not do just that.

Mara shrugs, deciding to not reveal the extent of what Dameron said. “He told me a lot more about you than you have…”

Kylo’s eyes narrow at her accusing tone. “I’m sorry we haven’t exactly had a chance for small talk.”

Mara’s temper flares, her stress from the day snapping loose at Kylo’s excuse. She can't contain the sudden anger she feels, unleashing it on him. “We had the chance for small talk, when you moved in next to me! But you acted like you weren’t some fucking monster! You didn’t warn me, you acted like everything was normal-”

“I told you, I was trying to do things properly!” Kylo interrupts harshly, stalking towards her. “I wanted to get to know you, to ease into things, but then everything went to hell! And now you’re calling me a monster?”

She tries to not recoil at his matching anger, refusing to back up towards the hotel room door. She holds her ground, staring up at his angry brown eyes. “You turn into a wolf the size of a grizzly bear, what else would you prefer to be called!? You killed a man-”

“He was insane! He would’ve mauled you, he was so far gone,” Kylo snarls. “It’s what happens when the human side of us gets lost, the instincts get twisted. Nothing matters but taking what you need.”

Mara falters. That brief, stress-induced rage slips through her fingers. Exhausted confusion is quick to take its place. “Then why are you not like that? Why aren’t you just taking what you need?” 

Kylo’s jaw clenches before he unclamps it to take a breath. She hears him hold it, like he’s trying to calm himself down, before he lets it out slowly. When he talks again, his voice is even. But his eyes are still darkened with emotion. “Because I’ve spent years trying to be in control…To not be a monster,” he says. “And it matters to me… That you feel it too. That you trust me.”

“I don’t even know you…” She shakes her head slightly, looking away. The fake names, the shady past… How can he just expect her to overlook all of it? Based on only a feeling?

Kylo is silent, and she can feel the tension that’s descended between them. It makes her uncomfortable, even as Kylo retreats from her. He crosses the room, tugging a hand through his dark hair.

“I’m sorry,” Mara murmurs. “I shouldn’t have used the word monster…”

“You don’t have to say sorry,” Kylo sighs. But he’s avoiding looking at her, face still guarded.

Guilt builds in her chest, and she fights frustrated tears. “But I am, if I hurt your feelings-”

“You need to rest,” Kylo cuts her off. “You’re overwhelmed, I can smell the stress coming off you.”

“You can _smell_ stress?” she repeats.

Kylo huffs, a small noise that doesn’t really count as a laugh. “Yeah. I can also always smell the nearest fast food joint. McDonalds, if you were curious.”

“That’s useful,” she quips.

A small smile quirks her lips at how sarcastic he had sounded, before it turns to a frown. Mara remembers the way she had smelled the blood earlier in the day. It had been too strong, nearly overpowering. She opens her mouth to say something to Kylo about it, before stopping. She doesn’t want to think about that now, or what it means.

“I’m going to grab a shower…” she says finally.

He nods, as she closes herself into the bathroom. She showers quickly, only to freeze in awkward realization as she’s drying off. She hadn’t been thinking, and hadn’t brought any clothes into the bathroom with her. Mara wraps up in a towel, edging out into the room towards her suitcase.

Kylo’s standing at the window, peering through the curtains. When he turns around, he’s silent at the sight of her. His eyes trace down over the towel, lingering on her damp skin. His fingers curl up, hands balling themselves into fists as he can’t seem to drag his eyes away from her.

“I forgot to take clothes in, sorry,” Mara rambles, trying to ignore his stare. It’s making her heart race, and she roughly shoves aside items in her suitcase. She can’t seem to find a shirt, coming up with everything but as she digs through it randomly.

“No that’s, uh, that’s fine,” Kylo assures quietly.

She blushes at the way he fumbles for words. It’s different from how he’s been in the past, assured and flirtatious. She finally spots a t-shirt rolled up, and snatches it.

“You can have the bathroom. I mean, if you need it. I’m done in there,” Mara offers.

“Yeah, thanks.”

She avoids looking at Kylo until he disappears into the bathroom, the door clicking shut behind him. Mara waits until she hears the water start before dropping the towel to pull her clothes on. As soon as she’s dressed, she lets her curious eyes rove towards his bag. His wallet is sitting on top, and she doesn’t even try to resist snooping.

Mara grabs the leather bifold, opening it and hurrying to pull the cards loose. Her eyes widen as she shuffles through them. There’s an assortment of names. There’s Kylo Ren right on top, but underneath she finds Philip Zimmerman, Phillip Altman, Clyde Logan…

“What the fuck,” she breathes, shoving the cards back into their slots. She drops the wallet, searching in his bag for the envelope he’d removed from the truck. It only takes a moment to find, and she peeks into it. It’s full of hundred-dollar bills.

Mara shoves it back into his bag, zipping it closed and pacing the room anxiously. A clap of thunder rumbles outside, causing her to jump. A minute later she sees a flash of lightning where the curtains still hang open a bit. It’s chased by more thunder. She tugs the curtains closed, her nerves beyond frayed. Normally, she enjoyed thunderstorms. But now it just seems to be pushing her further from being able to settle down.

Mara grabs the remote to the tv. It doesn’t take long before she lands on a news channel. She wraps her arms around herself, pacing back and forth at the foot of the bed.

The news shows a reporter standing in the middle of a dark street downtown. She recognizes it immediately as her city, the camera crew set up a few buildings down from the sheriff’s station. The reporter is backed up against yellow tape, her hair gusting in the wind.

“-can’t get any closer to the scene, but I’m told the damage is substantial. Again, I’m on site at Henderson County Sheriff Station, where earlier today an organized group of assailants laid siege to the station. Four officers are confirmed dead, with more in critical condition. We have no leads on who-”

Mara flips the channel, trying to swallow against the lump in her throat. But she only lands on another news channel, this one showing a man and a woman at a desk. The picture behind them shows the shattered front window of the sheriff’s station. It must have been taken earlier in the day, as bullet holes are visible in the sunlit façade of the building.

Her chest feels crushed, like she’s struggling to breathe against something wrapped tight around her ribs. The fear comes back, like it never left. How long can she run from the First Order? What do they want with her? Her life is never going to be the same.

“Over a dozen bodies were recovered, four of them local officers. We have no number on how many more were wounded,” the newswoman says.

“This is a very bizarre case,” the man takes over. “There’s a lot of conflicting rumors right now on social media, and I know we’ve all seen the videos. But I want to be clear in what we at Station 4 News have confirmed. There was an individual in custody who is now missing, sources indicate a police vehicle was-”

Mara jerks when Kylo pulls the remote free from her hand, shutting off the television. She hadn’t even heard him come out of the bathroom, looking up to find his eyes on her. He’s shirtless, only wearing athletic shorts. His wavy hair is still damp, curling back from the edges of his face. 

“You don’t need to hear that right now,” Kylo says, walking over to set the remote down on the nightstand.

She jumps again when an even louder rumble of thunder sounds. The television had at least blocked out the sound of the storm. The skin of her cheek tickles, and she reaches up to find her face is wet with tears. She wipes them away self-consciously, avoiding Kylo’s gaze. 

“Ignoring it isn’t going to make it go away,” Mara points out. But her voice is quiet, trembling. She’s searching the floor of the hotel room, restless feeling. 

“No,” Kylo agrees gently. “But throwing yourself into hysterics won’t help either.”

She says nothing for a moment, trying miserably to hold back another wave of emotions. She can feel Kylo’s eyes on her, and she’s humiliated to look back at him. She doesn’t want him to see her desperation, how badly she’s doing at holding herself together.

“I’m scared,” she admits in a whisper.

“Come here.” When she doesn’t move, his voice drops. “Mara.”

Her belly flutters at his tone, and she can’t stop herself. She catches his eyes once again, and the shimmer of red there sends a shock of heat racing through her body. Her feet move on their own, carrying her towards him at his command.

Kylo pulls her against his chest, her head fitting neatly under his chin. The effect is immediate, his embrace calming her the way it had earlier. His arms are warm around her, the closeness to him taking the edge off her nerves.

“It’s okay,” Kylo breathes into her hair. “You’re safe…”

His hold is so encompassing, she feels like she could hide from the rest of the world there. Everything about it lures her body into relaxing, the tension releasing in her muscles. The adrenaline that’s been racing through her veins all day finally abates. She lets herself practically fall against him, eliminating any last millimeter of space between them.

“I don’t know what to do,” Mara murmurs, trying to explain herself. But she’s hushed by one of Kylo’s hands, cradling the back of her head.

“That’s okay,” he insists quietly. “ _I’ve got you…”_

His voice is so soft, so tender. Something stirs in her brain, but she can’t seem to find the right word for it. It’s like recognition, waking up to his voice, to everything it means.

The longer he holds her, the headier she feels. He smells so good, she turns to tuck her face more snugly against his clean skin. Her hands slide over the broad muscles of his back in search of a place to cling on. The storm picks up outside, the window flashing with lightning, thunder rocking the atmosphere. But it all seems so far away now.

She knows, distantly, that it’s happening again. Whatever effect he has on her is creeping back in, hijacking her brain. But for the first time, Mara doesn’t fight it. It feels good, to not struggle against it. To let herself press against him, to breathe in his scent and let it take over her thoughts. After everything that has happened, she surrenders with relief to the comfort she feels with Kylo. She’s safe here, isn’t she? She’s safe with him.

His hand on her back slides down, finding the gap between her t-shirt and shorts. His fingertips rove her lower back, sliding up under the fabric to flatten his palm against her bare skin.

Mara hears a noise, and vaguely realizes it came from her. A whimper, or a moan, she doesn’t know. Some pitiful little sound as the lust blooms at his skin against hers, at his scent flooding her mind yet again. The recognition builds, urges her on. She knows him, doesn’t she? Knows exactly what he is to her.

Kylo’s fingers tangle in her hair, his other hand creeping up her spine, searching for more skin to touch. He shifts backwards, pulling her with him to the bed. He tries to sit, to settle her next to his side, but she makes a noise of protest at even that little space between them.

Mara climbs onto Kylo’s lap, straddling him, burying her face against his neck where his pulse is racing. His blood is rushing, she can feel it, can sense his heartbeat thudding in time with her own. Her mind is barely functioning. All she knows is that she needs to be closer, closer… her nails drag against his back, and a soft groan escapes him.

“Mara,” he chokes out. “I can’t…”

Can’t what? She doesn’t process what he means, it doesn’t matter. His hands roam her back, her sides, falling down to cup her bottom. His fingertips dig into her flesh deliciously, and he pulls her, forcing her pelvis tightly against him. She whimpers again, feeling him beneath her. He’s hard, so hard, just for her. The heat floods her body, pleasure spasming in her spine, curling tendrils through her body.

There is no part of her that is thinking anymore. It’s only instinct, and she’s hungry, starving. She nuzzles into his throat, dragging her nose against his skin, taking in his scent. He’s hers, and she needs him... needs him in her mouth, between her thighs…She needs the whole world to be Kylo, surrounding her, inside of her...

She lets her lips trail over his skin, licking at him, sucking. An animalistic growl vibrates from his throat. It’s deep, frustrated. But it sends her core clenching with anticipation, her nipples hardening as she presses herself even tighter to him. Her hips are twitching against him, longing to rock for him.

“Mara,” Kylo groans. His voice is tight, pained even. She doesn’t understand why he sounds so strained, why his hands pull away from her. She’s his. She knows it, now that she’s lost to her lust. Why isn’t he taking her?

Mara growls, impatient. She sinks her teeth into his flesh, where his neck meets his shoulder. Her hips buck against him, finally finding some of the friction she needs. She sees red, in the form of a pleasurable haze clouding her vision.

But it’s shattered when Kylo snarls, grabbing her and throwing her off of him. She lands with a soft thump onto the mattress, blinking in confusion as the world is forced back into reality. Her rational mind stutters back into existence with fragmented thoughts, startled to see Kylo snatch the room key. He doesn’t even look at her, storming out of the door.


	11. Chapter 11

Mara stares at the closed door, trying to understand what just happened. She makes a face, disturbed, as her brain recognizes the taste in her mouth. Coppery, but oddly pleasant. Blood.

Her body flushes hot with embarrassment as her memory returns in disconnected flashes. She’d crawled onto Kylo’s lap, that’s the last distinct thing she remembers. Everything else is fuzzy, like her brain was completely disconnected from her actions. She’s never felt that way before, not even while drunk. It’s disorienting. 

She crawls off the bed, trying to ignore the lingering evidence of her arousal. Her embarrassment only grows as she admits what would have happened, had Kylo not tossed her off of him. She shoves her feet into her shoes, leaving the room. The door clicks shut behind her before she realizes she doesn’t have a key.

Mara’s half expecting Kylo to be in the hallway, but he’s not. She wanders without a destination in mind, just wanting to clear her mind. What had happened to her? It was like all rational thought took a vacation. She’d practically been grinding on him… She groans and walks faster. Maybe she can leave her humiliation behind, if she just moves quickly enough.

The elevator takes too long for her liking, and she ends up using the stairs. Mara pounds down them, slamming her feet into the steps. When she reaches the bottom landing, the rain sounds loud outside. She doesn’t even hesitate. A few steps out the door, and the storm is absolutely drenching her.

She stops, standing there and bizarrely enjoying it. She hadn’t even realized how hot her skin is, she feels feverish. The cold raindrops are refreshing, and she turns her face up with a sigh.

“What are you doing?”

She freezes at Kylo’s voice before turning around to spot him, only a few steps away near the building. He’s absolutely soaked from the rain himself, his hair plastered down. The water runs in rivulets down his bare chest, and she notices he hadn’t even bothered to put shoes on. Had he been in that much of a rush to get away from her, that he’d ran outside half dressed?

“What are _you_ doing?” Mara retorts.

“Nature’s version of a cold shower,” he replies sarcastically.

“Well, same,” she answers, rolling her eyes and turning away.

“It defeats the purpose if you’re out her with me, while I’m trying to avoid you,” Kylo points out.

“Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you had dibs on the parking lot,” Mara snaps.

Thunder claps overhead, and the rain gets heavier. Still, it reminds her of when she was a child. Her mother would let her dance in summer rain storms, only encouraging her as she twirled through puddles like a ballerina. She sighs, looking back at Kylo when he doesn’t answer her.

She struggles with reading his expression, with identifying the emotion he's holding back. He lifts a hand to shove his soaked hair back from his face, staring at her confrontationally.

“I’m sorry,” Mara admits. “I didn’t mean to do that.”

“I know. That’s why I walked out,” Kylo explains. “I wasn’t going to keep it together, not when you were so…” he trails off, looking away.

“So what? What was that?” she asks, drifting closer to him. She feels better now, strangely. Apparently standing in a storm in the middle of the night was just what she needed.

Kylo only shrugs, the motion causing water to drip from the tip of his nose. “You know what it was.”

Mara doesn’t bother to hold in her incredulous laughter. She laughs like he’s made the best joke she’s ever heard. “No, I don’t! That’s the entire problem, I don’t _know_ anything, I don’t _understand_ anything-”

“I told you what’s happening already, you just want to deny it,” Kylo cuts her off, irritated.

“What-That I’m what? Born to be a werewolf?” she argues, incredulous.

“The human side of you lost control,” Kylo explains. “I guess at least the wolf has decided how you feel about me…”

Mara scoffs, but can’t find motivation to continue the argument. As much as she hates to admit it… There was something else that had taken over. Something that didn’t care about anything but Kylo and that feeling he stirred in her. What was that? It seems distant to her now, and she still can’t identify the proper word for it. 

Kylo crosses the last bit of space between them, and she spots the marks she’s left in his shoulder. A crescent of red imprints from her teeth, where she apparently broke the skin. She stares at it in disbelief.

“I’m sorry,” she repeats, giving him a horrified look. “I can’t believe I bit you that hard, I’m so sorry.”

Kylo laughs, surprising her. A small smile twists the corners of his lips. “It’ll be gone by morning. No worries.”

“Do you heal faster or something?” Mara asks skeptically, still frowning with guilt.

“Something like that, yeah,” he confirms.

“Of course you do…” she mutters. The rain is letting up a little, reduced now to a steady drizzle. The storm seems to be moving past them.

“I’m not handling this well, am I?” Mara asks suddenly, before laughing at herself. She probably doesn’t need to ask that. She's been stubborn and relatively useless, that much she's sure of. She's going to need to do better, and apparently that starts with believing Kylo's theory about her.

Kylo’s dark eyes survey hers, a humorous glint lighting them up. “No. You really aren’t,” he teases.

She sighs. Kylo shifts his attention over her shoulder, his eyes raking along the trees that surround the parking lot. “We should head in,” he suggests.

“Why?”

“I’m in a mood where if this asshole doesn’t back off, I’m going to murder him,” Kylo explains.

Mara’s eyebrows shoot up in confusion, and she turns around to search where he is looking. She doesn’t see anything. Just the foggy lights of the lot, and cars with misty windows. The woods are dark beyond. “Is someone out there?” she asks.

“Someone’s been out there, but he’s getting closer,” Kylo says tersely. “Maybe he wants his throat ripped out.”

Mara sighs with frustration, throwing her hands up in the air. “Could you please FUCK OFF!?” she shouts at the trees.

“Wow. Why didn’t I think of that?” Kylo drawls sarcastically.

Mara rolls her eyes again, turning to head back to the building. “Come on.” She snags Kylo’s arm, attempting to pull him back to the door. But he doesn’t move a muscle, staying put stubbornly. His narrowed eyes are locked onto the trees, tracing whatever threat he sees that she can’t make out.

“We aren’t leaving a breadcrumb trail of dead bodies, come on,” Mara insists.

Kylo gives a growl of frustration before yielding, letting her tug him towards the door. She feels guilty as they slink up the steps, for mucking the place up. Water is dribbling from her soaked strands and clothes, landing all over the carpeting.

She grabs the towel she used before as soon as they enter the room, attempting to dry off. Then she digs through her suitcase yet again, searching for something to change into. “Maybe next time we should get two rooms…” she thinks out loud.

“I’ll be fine, as long as you behave,” Kylo mutters defensively. But she notices he shuts himself into the bathroom when she turns away to peel her wet shirt overhead.

Mara wrings out her hair before giving up and laying down to sleep. She doesn’t even care that it’s still damp. She’s exhausted, and it’s already too late. As it is, they’re not going to get much sleep before morning comes. She falls asleep listening to the shower running through the bathroom door.

**Morning**

Hazy morning light brightens her eyelids, and Mara burrows her face deeper into the pillow. She feels warmth behind her and shifts backwards, her sleepy brain content to feel his solid chest against her back. Sleep fights to reclaim her, and she fidgets, subconsciously seeking to press herself to Kylo more firmly.

“If you keep wiggling your ass against me, I can’t be blamed for my actions,” Kylo complains, voice sleepy, from somewhere above her head.

Mara just murmurs a nonsense noise, fighting the pull of consciousness. She wants to sink back into sleep, but the blankets have shifted off her at some point in the early morning. The skin of her arms is chilled, and she tugs at the sheets to pull them up higher.

“Mm cold,” she whines.

Kylo wraps his arm around hers, and his skin feels nearly hot. She sighs happily, even as she starts to wake up more. The sun is getting brighter, the curtains at the window doing almost nothing to filter it. She feels Kylo nuzzling into her hair, his breath stirring it against her neck.

It sends shivers dancing along her body, and she makes a quiet noise of pleasure at the sensation. “Good morning,” Kylo greets softly.

His arm tightens, locking both of hers against her waist. She presses her hips back against him on impulse, a reaction to the feeling of his arm pinning hers. Kylo groans softly in response, rolling them a bit so he’s shifted partially on top of her. His weight presses her down to the mattress. Mara wakes up fully but doesn’t move, wanting to stay like this but knowing she shouldn’t get carried away. She doesn’t want a replay of the previous night…does she?

Kylo takes the opportunity, releasing her arms to pull her hair aside. He bends down, his lips finding the back of her neck, teeth grazing dangerously. Mara tenses, worry creeping into her mind for a moment. But he trails kisses, working his way to the sensitive spot near the crook of her neck. She relaxes, eyes fluttering back closed when his lips close on her skin to suck, releasing with a light nip.

Mara plants a hand on the mattress to turn herself, working her way more fully underneath him. His weight on top of her is turning her on, his teeth teasing at the same spot on her body where she’d bit him. She shouldn’t be doing this, she thinks. It is too risky. But it feels good, his mouth marking her neck up, his hips pressing his arousal against her. 

Kylo covers her hand with his, pushing it down into the sheets as he props himself on top of her. She uses any bit of leverage she can find to press up against him, urging him on, only for his hips to crush hers back down. A soft sound slips through her lips, taken aback by how much she likes this simple pressure between them. He pulls his lips from her skin, his fingers interlacing with hers.

“Fuck,” Kylo rasps, burying his face against her neck once more, and breathing deeply. “I want you…”

His admission makes pleasure twist deep inside of her, and she has to bite her tongue. Any number of dangerous things could slip out if she were to speak right now. Things she couldn’t take back, that would push them both over the edge. She holds onto restraint, refraining from bucking her hips up into his.

Mara knows what she should say. That they should stop, that they should get out of this bed and get going. But she doesn’t, prolonging the heat of his body covering hers, his warm breath on her neck. She doesn’t want it to end.

Kylo seems to get it together before her, pulling himself up. “I'm already sick of cold showers,” he grumbles, rising from the bed.

She turns to see him, a soft smile breaking out on her face at his grumpy expression. His hair is wild, eyes puffy with tiredness. “I’m sorry…” she mumbles half-heartedly, tugging the sheet up to hide the lower half her face.

He narrows his eyes. “No, you’re not,” he says, stretching. “You tease.” His voice is humorous, despite his attempt to sound annoyed, and her smile grows.

Mara does her best to avoid staring at the crotch of his shorts, at the evidence of his arousal. She forces her eyes up to the ceiling, trying without a bit of success to get her mind out of the gutter. She apparently woke up with her mind in the gutter, and it was there to stay. Now she knows how Erica must feel. “Well the sooner we check out, the sooner we can get coffee,” she points out, trying hard to change the subject.

“Now you’re speaking my language,” Kylo agrees.

**Later that Morning**

They stop at a diner for breakfast, when it becomes clear that Kylo’s cranky mood is not going to improve without caffeine. Mara is quickly learning he isn’t much of a morning person, and unfortunately she’s not much better. She didn’t get enough sleep, and there is a background level of anxiety any time she thinks about what they are running from.

She works on eating as much of her waffle as she can, drowning it in syrup and butter. Kylo downs his third cup of coffee, his eyes finally seeming to brighten up. The diner isn’t very busy, probably because it’s a weekday and most people are at work. There’s some older couples scattered in the booths, and a mom with two kids.

Mara turns her attention to the television over the bar, watching some commercial for a medication transition into a morning news show. The anchors are dragging on about something, but the volume is on mute. Mara is too lazy to read the captioning, about to look away, when the image changes.

Her mouth falls open, still partially full of waffle, at the video being shown on the television. She shoves it back closed, only to clap a hand over her lips instead.

The video is of her city, showing the street downtown that the sheriff’s station is situated on. It shows a monstrous wolf, the very same wolf that had chased them as they fled the station, staggering down the road. Blood drips from its wounds, a crumpled police vehicle in back of it. The view shakes spastically when the wolf freezes, its eyes seeming to stare straight into the camera. The cell phone video then cuts off, as whoever had been filming must decide to run.

The news show replays it a second time, and Mara smacks out blindly for Kylo’s arm. “What?” he asks, confused. When he follows her gaze towards the television, he notices the video.

“Well, that’s not good,” he remarks, grabbing a piece of bacon off a plate.

Mara finally forces the food in her mouth down with a painful gulp, taking a sip of water when her eyes water. “Not good?” she repeats. “That’s a fucking disaster.”

Kylo shrugs. “They’ll find some way to Bigfoot it.”

“What?”

“You know. They’ll get an expert to come in and say it’s fake,” he explains, unconcerned.

Mara stares at him a moment longer, unable to understand how he is so calm about everything, before glancing back at the television. Her eyes widen in horror at the sight of her own face.

“Kylo.”

“Huh?”

“We need to go,” she whispers urgently. The captioning beneath her face is flashing too fast for her to read everything, but she gets the gist of it. She’s been reported missing.

“I’m not done eating,” he protests.

“Look at the television,” Mara hisses under her breath, eyes darting around the diner. Nobody seems to have noticed her presence, and the resemblance to her portrait now displayed on the screen. But she’s suddenly incredibly paranoid.

Kylo looks back up at the television, before the surprise registers on his face. “Fuck.”

He stands, fishing his wallet out of his jeans pocket to drop some bills onto the table. Mara joins him, and they make a hasty retreat from the diner. “I can clear this up, right? If I just go to the police-”

“I don’t think that’s a good option,” Kylo cuts her off. “The First Order’s probably listening to the scanners. How else would they have found you at the station yesterday?”

Mara climbs into the passenger side of the truck, silently contemplating that. “Great. So I’m just a missing person now.”

“Better to be a missing person, than let the Order find you,” Kylo says, backing the truck out of the spot. They pull out of the diner, leaving it behind to merge onto the freeway. Mara’s lost track of where they’re even headed at this point, but she knows they’ve crossed at least one state line.

“What is the Order, anyway? Are they just some supernatural hunting… club?” she asks lamely, unable to find a better word.

But Kylo shakes his head, reaching down to crank up the AC. The temperature is rising as the summer day pushes closer to afternoon, the inside of the cab warmer than they’d left it. “No. They’re like a cult, I guess,” he answers. “A magic cult.”

“A magic cult,” Mara repeats, tone deadpan.

Kylo makes a face. “I know, it sounds stupid. Their leader says he’s a 400 year old alien.”

“Of course he thinks he’s a 400 year old alien,” Mara retorts sarcastically. “And I’m sure some comet will be circling Earth to pick him and his followers up, any day now.”

Kylo’s hands have tightened on the steering wheel, and Mara notes the sudden tension with a confused frown. “You haven’t seen him…” he mutters.

“And you have?” she asks, surprised.

“Yes.”

Mara bites at her lip, not wanting to say the wrong thing. Kylo’s easygoing mood has vanished, so clearly something about their current conversation has him on edge. But she can’t seem to stop herself before the curious question tumbles out between them.

“You weren’t _in_ the magic cult, were you?”

Kylo’s eyes flash over to hers in a glare, his jaw setting. “No.”

She regrets asking immediately. “I’m sorry, I-”

“Just drop it for now,” Kylo snaps, before sighing. “Please,” he adds.

“Sure,” she agrees, turning to look out the window at the scenery flashing by. They sit in silence for a while, and eventually she sees the anger ease from Kylo’s posture. His shoulders relax the longer they drive, until he signals suddenly, pulling over into the exit lane.

“Um, where are we headed?” Mara asks, surveying the road they’ve pulled onto. All she sees are some food places and an outdoors store. Surely, he’s not hungry again already, right? The man ate a breakfast that came on three plates.

Kylo points at the outdoor supply store. “Might as well stock up.”

“On what? Kayaks?” Mara quips.

“Ammo,” he corrects.

She spins around in her seat, confirming that the stolen rifle is indeed shoved under the backseat. She had almost forgotten him stowing it there when they made their escape, the memory lost in the daze of her shock yesterday. It’s barely visible, and combined with the tinted windows wouldn’t be noticeable from outside the truck. Their bags block all but a bit of the stock from view.

“Are we going to need that?” Mara asks faintly.

“In case you haven’t noticed, it takes a lot to stop one of us. If we get a pack on our heels…yeah,” Kylo explains, pulling into a parking spot.

“I don’t know if bullets are even going to work, in that case. Maybe a tank would be a better option,” she remarks, attempting to lighten her own mood with humor. It fails.

Kylo just huffs. “Yeah, I’ll see if they have any of those in stock.” He swings open the door. “Stay here.”

“What, I’m not allowed to go in?”

“You’re forgetting the part where your face was plastered all over the news,” Kylo reminds her, hitting the lock button on the door before closing it. He gives her a shrug through the window, before taking off towards the doors.

Mara groans, leaning back in the seat and closing her eyes. “Can this situation get any more fucked…?” she wonders aloud.


	12. Chapter 12

Mara tries to wait patiently for Kylo, but her eyes keep tracking the man parked a few spots down. He’s the only other person in the parking lot, his motion catching her attention. His car is on the other side of the lane, and he is talking on the phone, pacing. She can’t help but wonder if he’d let her borrow it to make a call…

She wants to talk to Erica, even if just for a brief moment. Her friends are probably panicking, after all… She perks up when he appears to end the conversation, pocketing his phone. Mind made up, Mara opens the door to hop down out of the truck.

He’s unloading his cart when she approaches nervously. “Excuse me?” she tries awkwardly.

When he turns and notices her, he smiles uncertainly. “Hi?”

“Hi! Um, I know this is kind of random, but I was just wondering if you’d consider letting me borrow your phone?” she asks quickly, before rushing to explain further. “I just need to make a call, and mine is broken, and I know my friend is probably worried. But if not, I can ask someone else.”

The man’s already reaching into his pocket however, pulling the phone out. “I don’t mind,” he assures, unlocking the screen and holding it out.

Mara takes it with an apologetic look. She’s lucky he’s a kind person, as she imagines not many people would be so quick to help.

“Thank you so much, I really appreciate it,” she assures him.

He shrugs slightly. “We’ve all been there before, and it’s not like you can find a pay phone anywhere.”

She smiles, looking down to dial Erica’s number. It’s the only phone number she has memorized, from filling it in on various emergency contact lists. There was never a point in putting her mother’s name down, as her mom had refused cell phones about as much as she refused the rest of technology.

The phone only rings twice before Erica answers. Her voice sounds wary, thick with stress. “…Hello? Who is this?”

“It’s me, Erica,” Mara says quickly. “I’m so sorry I took off-”

“Fuck, Mara!” Erica cuts her off loudly. “Where the fuck are you!? We’ve been freaking out, Dameron said you were in the station when it was attacked!”

“Dameron’s alive?” Mara asks urgently, relieved at the news. She’d been expecting the worst regarding the Deputy, and somehow knowing he made it through everything makes her feel better.

“Yes, and he is saying some crazy shit,” Erica replies quickly. “He said your neighbor kidnapped you-where _are_ you!?”

“Kylo didn’t kidnap me,” Mara hisses into the phone, aware of the man watching her. She gives him a nervous smile, turning around in an attempt to find privacy. She doesn’t want to wander too far from him while holding his property.

“Okay, then where are you?” Erica presses. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, I’m with Kylo,” Mara tries to explain. “We…we…Look, it’s hard to explain, but-”

“You’re _with_ Kylo?” Erica asks, her voice sounding tense. “Mara, you have to get away from him. Dameron said he could be a murderer. Kylo isn’t even his real name!”

“I know that,” Mara says, wincing her eyes closed. “But he’s not a bad guy, really-”

“I just told you he could be a murderer, are you fucking delusional?” Erica snaps angrily. “I don’t care what he’s told you Mara, you need to get away from him. Get away from him right now!”

“I can’t do that,” she replies, frowning. The man whose phone she’s currently using is now watching her openly, eyes growing concerned. She tries to give another weak smile, but she knows Erica’s panicked voice is probably carrying through the speaker too well.

“Yes, you can. Where are you? I’ll come get you,” Erica insists. “I’ll come get you and whatever is going on, I’ll help you!”

Mara feels her heart lurch, guilt causing her chest to ache. She’d meant to reassure her friend, not throw her into even more panic. She happens to be looking towards the store front when she sees Kylo emerge, headed her way.

“Erica listen to me, I’m fine. I am going to be fine, but I can’t come back right now,” she says quickly. “I need you to trust me, I know what I’m doing! I have to go.” She hangs up, the guilt only growing as she hears Erica’s pleas cut off when she hits the call end symbol. Worst yet, she’s lied. She has absolutely no idea what she’s doing. She wipes a stray tear away before the man can see it.

“Are you…okay?” the man asks uncertainly.

She turns around to hold the phone out. His expression is openly worried.

“I’m fine, thank you so much for letting me use your phone,” Mara says.

He takes it, but he looks like he wants to say more. She takes a step back, trying to retreat towards the truck. She shouldn’t have bothered calling Erica, she feels like she’s only made things worse. She tries to hide the emotions from showing on her face, but it’s too late. The man seems to have detected that something is entirely off with her.

“If you…If you need help, or something…” the guy begins.

“No, really, I’m fine,” she insists, but he reaches out, his hand gently catching her arm.

“If you’re in a bad situation, you just say the word,” he says. “We can wait in the store for the police-”

“No! No police, I’m fine-” She attempts to pull free from him, but his eyes are determined. She jerks when Kylo’s infuriated voice meets her ears.

“If you like that hand, you’ll get it the fuck off her,” Kylo growls.

The man’s hold of her arm drops instantly, as he visibly recoils from Kylo stalking towards them. She doesn’t blame him. Between Kylo’s size and the expression of rage on his face, he looks terrifying.

“He was just trying to help,” Mara says quickly, hoping to calm the situation.

“Get in the truck,” Kylo snaps, grabbing her arm to tow her away from the stranger.

“Hey, don’t force her!” the guy protests. “This doesn’t seem right-”

Kylo snarls, the sound more like a provoked animal than a man. He releases Mara, only to lunge forward and grab the man’s arm in a bruising grip. Mara gasps, grabbing onto Kylo to attempt to pry him off the poor guy.

“Stop!” she cries out, but it’s useless. Kylo isn’t letting go, and when she glances at his face, she realizes his eyes are burning a demonic red. The man is completely paralyzed with fear, staring into Kylo’s eyes, mouth agape in shock.

“If you tell anyone about this, I will find you, and I will murder you and your entire fucking family,” Kylo growls, his voice deep with menace.

“What the fuck!?” Mara gasps in disbelief. “Stop it!”

He does, but not before the man cries out in pain. Her eyes shoot down to his arm to see that Kylo’s claws have punctured his skin, blood trailing down his forearm.

“Kylo,” she breathes, aghast. Has he lost his mind?

“Get in the truck. Now,” Kylo orders, flinging the man’s arm loose. He scrambles away from them, face completely terrified.

Mara obeys, almost running to the truck to climb in. She doesn’t want to test the situation any further, not when Kylo’s acting like he’s about to kill someone. Why would he hurt some random stranger? The man had done nothing wrong.

Kylo follows her into the truck, starting it up in a hurry. She stares at him as they pull away from the store, shocked. He doesn’t look back at her. Though his eyes have returned to their human brown shade, his face is no less angry. His muscles are all tensed, like his body is riding a wave of adrenaline.

“What is wrong with you?” she hisses, emotions battling between indignation and fear.

“What’s wrong with me!? Why the fuck would you do that!?” Kylo rants, struggling to keep his voice down.

“You didn’t have to hurt him!” she insists.

“YES! I did!”

She flinches when he slams his hand into the dash, hard. His eyes are wild with anger, face locked into a glare that he directs at the road. Mara curls her fingers around the edges of the seat, scared.

“Damage control,” he spits out. “Your face is on the news. What happens when that guy goes home and realizes ‘Hey, that’s the girl who was crying in the parking lot today! Better call someone and tell them I saw her!’”

Mara lowers her eyes, clenching her jaw to try to hold another wave of tears back. “I wasn’t thinking, I just wanted to make a call-”

“You need to start thinking! You don’t draw attention to yourself when you need to disappear!” Kylo rants loudly. She hears him suck in a deep breath, holding it as silence falls thickly between them. He follows it with another, and she recognizes his attempt at calming down. She waits for a while, letting him get a handle on his anger.

“You can’t just threaten to murder people,” Mara ventures finally, halfheartedly. 

“I can if I need them to be so scared, they don’t even consider going to the police,” Kylo grinds out.

She stares at the road ahead, as understanding sinks in. Kylo had made it much more appealing for the man to drive away from the parking lot and try to act like it hadn’t happened. To do anything else would be to admit a man with red eyes and claws had hurt him, which in itself sounds insane, and to risk another confrontation. For the sake of his sanity and safety, the guy probably wouldn’t say a word now.

“Who did you call?” Kylo asks, interrupting her thoughts.

“Erica.”

“Did you tell her where we are?” he pushes.

“No…” Mara hesitates, not wanting to make things worse. But it’s a struggle to hold information back from him, something in her pushing for honesty. “Officer Dameron survived. He thinks you’ve abducted me.”

Kylo’s fingers curl around the steering wheel, his grip tightening. “Great.”

**Later**

The mood between them has been strange since the incident in the parking lot. Though the anger has passed, Kylo is quiet. Mara doesn’t mind, as she keeps dozing off and on. The sun is too bright to really sleep deeply, but she didn’t get nearly enough rest the night before. She perks up when they stop for food, her stomach giving a gurgle at the sight of restaurants.

She ends up openly gaping at Kylo while they eat, astonished by the sheer amount of food he puts down. He seems to notice her attention, balling up a wrapper and tossing it into the empty bag.

“I think something’s wrong with me,” he says.

“I mean…Yeah. You just ate, like, 4,000 calories in a single meal. And you’ve still got an 8-pack,” Mara points out. “There’s definitely something wrong with you.”

Kylo sighs, letting his head fall back against the head rest. He stares out the windshield, his posture finally relaxing after a morning of tension.

“No, not that… It’s like my hormones are out of control, or something,” he tries to explain.

“What do you mean?”

“I saw that guy touch you, and I wanted to rip his arm off and beat him with it,” Kylo says plainly.

Mara’s eyes widen in alarm, before she forces her face into something less startled. “Um… That does seem like a bit much.”

“Right.”

“Has this ever happened before?” she asks, trying to understand. She has no idea what is usual for a werewolf, but assumes Kylo must know more.

He shrugs, however. “There’s always been the aggression, but this is different… It’s getting worse the longer I’m with you.”

Mara picks up her drink, nervously dragging a sip through the straw. “Well, has this happened around…” she stops herself, hesitating on the right phrasing. “Around women like me, before?”

“There haven’t been any women like you before.”

Mara stares at him, frustrated at the miscommunication. “Okay, but…Has it happened when you’re around female werewolves?”

Kylo’s eyes drop down to his hands, studying them. She furrows her brow at his change in mood, as he almost seems…nervous? He swallows, gnawing at his lower lip before finally answering.

“The only female werewolf I’ve ever been around was my mother, and she died when I was twelve,” he admits quietly.

“I’m sorry,” Mara says immediately, hating that she’s dragged up what must be a painful topic for him. Kylo shrugs a shoulder, his eyes raising to meet hers. For a long moment she’s lost, searching his gaze, before she forces herself to look away and try to focus.

“I guess I don’t understand why, though? Have you avoided them?” she tries to question, confused.

Kylo shakes his head. “You remember the wolf that attacked you? Why do you think he was crazy?”

“I don’t know…”

“The Order’s been taking the females of our kind for centuries. At least that’s what I’ve heard. They kill or experiment on anything supernatural, but female werewolves… They take them,” Kylo explains. “My mom died rather than get captured.”

“…What do they take them for?” Mara asks fearfully.

“I don’t know. I’m sorry,” Kylo says quietly. “But I think that’s why they’re coming after you so strongly. I should’ve explained sooner, but you were already freaked out. I didn’t want to make it worse.”

Mara takes a shaky breath, closing her eyes to let that sink in. Her mind runs to her mother. She had to have known the threat posed by the First Order, right? Where is she now? Is she running and hiding, the way Kylo said he lived his life? Or is it worse? Could her mother have been taken by the First Order already?

She grips the labradorite pendant on her necklace, but it fails to soothe her. It had once felt like a comfort, a reminder of her mother…Now it just feels like a cold stone, a reminder of what is missing and unknown.

“What does that have to do with the wolf that tried to kill me?” Mara asks after a long moment of silence. When Kylo doesn’t answer immediately, she looks over at him. He shifts uncomfortably before meeting her gaze, expression guarded.

“The instinct to find a mate is overwhelming,” he says carefully. “All of that drive and no outlet…Over time, I think for some of us, it drives us insane.”

“So, what? You think you’re going insane because of me?” she asks, brow furrowing with disbelief. But Kylo rolls his eyes, scoffing.

“No, that’s not what I’m saying. But I don’t really know how this is supposed to work, beyond what my mom told me back when I was a kid,” he points out. “It started out like this gentle pull, when I first noticed you near me… I don’t even think the others felt you at first. But now…”

He gives up on explaining, shrugging. His eyes fall to her drink. “Are you going to finish your milkshake?”

Mara narrows her eyes in disbelief. How is he still hungry? “No, go ahead.”

She thinks for a little while longer, drilling her fingertips into her leg, before venturing to ask what she’s wondering about. “That fake marshal? He said the man you killed left a trail of female victims. That they’d all been stalked and heard howling before being found dead, torn apart. Do you think he was just telling me that?”

Kylo considers that while he finishes off the drink, before leaning forward to turn the key in the ignition. The engine starts up, and Mara is already dreading another stretch on the road. The endless driving is getting monotonous. What is their plan, anyway? Surely, they can’t just drive forever…

“Maybe he was lying. But it could also be the truth. It wouldn’t be the first time,” Kylo replies.

“It wouldn’t be the first time a werewolf mauls a bunch of women to death?” she repeats in disbelief. “Is that a common thing?”

He frowns at the snark in her tone. “Like I said, there is the drive to find a mate… Without any of our kind around, maybe he started trying to turn human women. Or maybe, he just lost his fucking mind. Who knows.”

“Does that not work? Turning human women?” Mara clarifies curiously.

“If I bit a hundred people randomly, maybe one wouldn’t die from it? I don’t know. It’s all genetics,” Kylo says uncertainly. “If they don’t have the right make-up, they’re not going to survive.”

Mara swallows as they come to a stop at a stop sign. Kylo’s waiting for a break in traffic to pull out onto the road, and she tries to pin down what in his response has made her so nervous.

“So if you’re wrong, and I’m not… latent or whatever,” she begins. “If you bite me, I’ll die.”

Kylo’s eyes land on hers, darkening. “I’m not wrong.”

She says nothing in reply, looking away from his determined expression. A moment later and they’re driving again, the scenery flashing by too quickly for her eyes to track. Mara’s fingers slowly trace the shape of her necklace, surprised to find it still chilly against her skin. It should be warmed from being around her neck, but it is obstinately cool.

Her mind is stuck on that little bit of doubt, festering in her thoughts. What if he is wrong? What if she gives in to those treacherous, lusty thoughts, letting his teeth sink into her, only for it to be a terrible mistake? Mara’s mind feels far away as she considers the possibility that Kylo could kill her.


	13. Chapter 13

**Night**

Despite how tired she is, Mara can’t seem to find sleep. It doesn’t help that Kylo’s left her in the motel room alone, promising to stay right outside. But when she peeks through the curtains, she doesn’t see him. His absence makes her anxious, but then again, his presence had been unnerving her as well.

Whatever is wrong with Kylo, she can practically feel it. Or maybe it’s happening to her, too. She doesn’t know how much longer she’s going to be able to resist the invasive thoughts. They grow stronger the longer she’s close to him, his scent overpowering her mind, making her mouth water with hunger. It’s even worse when they’re driving, the same scenery flashing by the window. She has nothing to think about in that truck, so her eyes always end up on Kylo.

She unlatches the door, wanting to get some fresh air. They’re on the second floor, a covered walkway outside their room. She steps out onto it, taking deep breaths. The half moon in the sky gives enough light to search the parking lot below, yet Mara doesn’t see Kylo anywhere.

She bites her lip, trying not to worry. He wouldn’t lie, right? Surely he’s right down there, somewhere close enough to hear if she called for him. She nearly does, before biting her tongue. He deserves some space… Most likely, he _needs_ some space… He’d seemed tightly wound when they checked into the motel. He’d caught his breath when she brushed past him to enter the room, flickers of red dancing in his eyes.

Mara is distracted from her thoughts of Kylo when she shifts, allowing the pendant of her necklace to slip under the neckline of her shirt. It drops against her skin, and she shivers. The labradorite is still strangely cold. It’s never felt like this before.

She pulls the stone up in her fingers to fiddle with it, examining it in the low light. Oddly enough, the longer she stares, the more she can see the colors within the stone. They are stunningly bright, she’s never noticed them this vivid. Mesmerizing blues shimmer as she turns it in the moonlight, mingling with cool greens and a flash of glowing amber.

Mara frowns when the stone turns to ice against her fingertips. It’s been growing colder all day. There’s no way she’s imagining this, something strange is happening to her necklace. She flinches, scrambling to pull the necklace off as it grows painfully frigid.

She’s fumbling with the clasp when something slaps over her mouth. She jerks on instinct, trying to cry out when someone catches her around the midsection, yanking her back off her feet. Mara tries to force a scream, flailing her arms, but no noise escapes. Whatever is over her mouth deadens the sound, and also stops her from drawing in air. She struggles, panicking without oxygen. She can't pull away, their grip is brutally strong. She's clawing at the arm around her waist when something pinches into the skin of her neck.

**Some Time Later**

“Awaken.”

Mara comes to with a startled jerk, pulled from complete unconsciousness so rapidly that she feels disoriented. Her throat and lungs burn, and she coughs when she tries to drag air in too greedily. Her body shudders, skin covered by an unnatural chill. The movement only makes her realizes her hands are restrained, bound together above her head.

Mara blinks rapidly, but everything she sees only pulls her terror into sharper focus. She’s in a darkly lit, circular room. There is a dirty stone floor beneath her, crumbling walls made out of the same rock surrounding her. She tugs on whatever is holding her arms up, anchored above her head to the hard surface in back of her.

It feels like only moments ago she was at the motel, pondering where Kylo had gone. Where is she now? She doesn’t see anyone, who brought her here? How much time has passed? She feels hungover, achy and thirsty. Her mind is foggy, but that doesn’t stop one thought from forming with perfect clarity: This is bad. This is so very bad, whatever has happened… Is this hunters? Or the First Order? How did they find her?

Mara angles her head, trying to examine her wrists in hopes of escape. But upon looking up she stops, taken aback by the sight above her. The ceiling is a large dome. It’s a massive, solid slab of a dark, reflective stone. The only light in the room seems to be spilling from a small, circular opening in the middle.

“Where am I…” she breathes, shivering as her dread rises. It’s freezing here, she half expects her breath to fog in the air.

“Does it matter?”

Mara jumps. She hadn’t been expecting a response, not when her first study of the place suggested she was alone. She cranes her neck at the voice, deep and somehow sinister. There’s only one archway that interrupts the curving walls, and it looks like it leads down a hallway. There’s a figure there, cloaked in the shadow that persists beyond the chamber. She strains her eyes, but can’t make out his face. He sounds distinctively male, and despite the dark he lingers in, appears unusually tall.

Mara returns with renewed panic to searching her wrists, but the rope confining her seems to be knotted tightly against her skin. It’s fixed to a rung that’s driven deep into the stone, and as she struggles, the material chafes her skin. The man watching her laughs, an unsettling, croaky sound.

Mara thrashes angrily at the bindings, fear flooding her system with adrenaline. It urges her to run or fight, but she can do neither. An irritated shriek twists from her throat when she makes no headway, her wrists stinging from rope burn. “Let me go! Where am I!?”

“It doesn’t matter where you are,” he replies. She stops moving, trying to slow her rapid breathing before she falls headfirst into hysteria.

The figure moves, and her eyes fly to his shape to track the motion. He draws closer, pausing in the archway. He stops just beyond the dim light of the chamber. “What do you mean?” she asks quietly.

“Once you are with me, nothing else will concern you. By my side, you will be home,” he answers. 

Her heart plummets, feeling like it’s dropped right through her stomach. Horrified tears fill her eyes at his ominous words. For a moment, there’s just her noisy gasps for breath as she stares at him. She knows what she wants to ask, but uttering it out loud seems like too much. Does she really want to know the answer? Then again, avoiding asking the right questions won’t spare her from his intentions.

Mara forces the question out of her chapped lips, her voice too timid and small for the large space. “Who are you?”

He doesn’t answer immediately, lets her sit there shaking against the stone. But then he moves again, striding forward to leave the archway. When he steps into the dim light of the chamber, she recoils. There’s nowhere to flee backwards, but she presses herself against the rough stone anyway. He’s horrifying to behold, and she is paralyzed with shock and disgust as she searches his face.

Is he…He can’t be…human? His features are twisted, wrecked by time, ravaged by scars. A deep crevice bisects his bald head, his cheeks collapsed in. His skin is like decaying leather. It clings to his bones in thin, blotched patches, some places nearly rotting away.

Mara feels revulsion rising the longer she considers him. She doesn’t even need him to answer her question, not now that she can see him. She’d mocked it when Kylo said the leader of the First Order was an alien, but if this is him, she now believes it. Everything about him is unnatural, ancient in a way no human being could ever achieve.

He comes closer, gold robes skirting the floor, and she sees abscesses in his throat where his tissues have collapsed in. They flutter with each breath beneath twisted tendons that resemble vines choking a tree. His pale blue eyes study her, one side of his face twisted in a disturbing grimace. The other half seems deadened, unable to emote.

“I am Supreme Leader of the First Order,” he says, his grating voice reverberating around the space.

Mara cringes backwards at his continued approach, disgusted at the thought of him getting near enough to touch her. But then his entire being flickers, a brief flash. She drops her attention from his nightmarish visage to the stiff looking robes that cover his towering frame. Mara realizes she can see through him, just barely. Is he some sort of ghostly projection?

“Smart girl,” he remarks wryly, as if he's read her mind. “For now, my body is elsewhere. But it won’t be long until I can join you in the flesh.”

The relief that this horrible creature isn’t physically in front of her is tempered by the threat of his arrival, and the fact that he seems to be able to hear her thoughts. How is that possible? She needs to escape, to get out of this strange chamber and run. But her wrists only burn as she tugs halfheartedly at the ropes tied there, and anger surges at the reminder of how trapped she is.

“What the fuck do you want with me!?” she demands, attempting to be braver than she feels. “Why am I here?”

His watery eyes narrow, and he raises one of his decrepit hands. She stares at the yellowed nails there, shaped into pointed claws.

Mara jerks at her hands, glaring at him. “I said, _what_ do you _want_ -”

She is cut off when something constricts around her throat, pressing itself against her windpipe so firmly that not the smallest wisp of air can pass. She lurches forward, mouth opening in a gape as she tries with futility to suck in oxygen. She yanks at her hands frantically, trying to free herself to paw at her throat. Something is strangling her, and it squeezes even tighter as her head begins to throb. 

It releases, right at the moment where she feels the world beginning to spin around her. She gulps in air noisily, tears spilling down her cheeks from terror. When she dares to look back at the disfigured man, he is grinning with amusement.

“Such a beautiful, defiant creation,” he remarks. “What I want is the culmination of my efforts. An end to my project that has been years in the making.”

Mara meets his foggy gaze, his eyes dimmed by age. Despite the terror racing through her nervous system, she can’t control the anger. She glares at him, a temper like nothing she’s ever felt before rising in her. She feels a wave of aggression, overwhelming everything else. She pants, pulling at the rope uselessly until she can feel blood running, tickling her skin. Being pinned down and unable to do anything is making it worse, her mind possessed with unnatural rage. 

“There it is,” he rasps. “It is buried deep, isn’t it?”

“I don’t know what you are talking about,” she bites out through clenched teeth. “I don’t understand.”

“Just as the lamb doesn’t understand it was raised for slaughter,” he replies, gaze travelling down over her body. When his eyes return to her face, he sneers. “It won’t be long. The full moon is approaching, and then you will understand.”

He turns from her, his body flickering again like a failing projector. He makes long, crooked strides back towards the archway, and she realizes someone else is there. Whoever it is waits outside the chamber.

“Take her to the safe house,” he orders. “Guard her until I arrive.”

The Supreme Leader blinks out of existence, vanishing. She stares at the spot he had previously occupied. How could he do that? How had he been able to choke her, without physically touching her? She’d scoffed at the idea of a magic cult, but now…

Whoever he was speaking to comes forward, and Mara growls with renewed rage at the sight of Armitage Hux. His appearance confirms that he must be working for the First Order, and he looks much more corporeal than the Supreme Leader had. Her muscles tense, mind supplying a steady barrage of urges. Most of them revolve around somehow finding a way to hurt the fake marshal, to take out her frustrations violently.

Hux looks wary, his eyes tired as he gets close. “Easy now.”

“Fuck you,” she spits out. “Fuck you and your fake badge and your freaky, decomposing corpse of a boss!”

“I see Ren hasn’t taught you any control,” he remarks, stopping near her feet. He lowers his voice, squatting down to survey her. “I told you to leave town, not run away with Kylo Ren-”

Mara snarls, striking out without warning with her foot. She throws all of her energy into the kick, aiming directly between his denim-clad thighs. But Hux’s reflexes are quick, and he grabs her foot, forcing it to the floor. She jerks her other leg towards his face, thrashing like a child throwing a temper tantrum. Hux growls with annoyance, attempting to pin her legs.

“Stop it!” he snaps. 

She falls still beneath his hands, injecting as much wrath as she can into her glare. His blue eyes flicker between hers, before he frowns.

“If you don’t cooperate, I’ll have to drug you again,” he warns. “You don’t want that, do you?”

Mara grits her teeth, but shakes her head. She feels bad enough as is, without a second dose of whatever had knocked her out. The pressure on her legs lessens, as he gradually releases his hands to raise them up in a nonthreatening gesture. When she doesn’t strike out again, he seems to relax.

“You’re going to need to trust me,” Hux says. “I’m your only friend here.”

She searches his gaze in disbelief. “Trust you!? I don't know you! You’ve lied to me, about _everything_ -”

“I only lied to you about the organization I worked for,” he interrupts, daring to shift forward. She freezes when he comes close to reach over her head, finding the knot in the rope.

“The organization that you just kidnapped me for!” Mara snarls, hissing when the rope digs against her skin.

“Stop wiggling, you’ve got the knot pulled too tight,” he warns, planting himself on his knees beside her and getting entirely too close for her liking. She freezes, turning her face from his chest as he tries to loosen her bindings.

“What do you crazy people want with me? Are you going to kill me on the full moon, like some sort of blood sacrifice to your Grand Wizard-”

“Supreme Leader,” Hux hisses in correction, before heaving a sigh. He rocks back on his heels, and Mara jerks away when he reaches under the flap of his jacket to reveal a knife. “Stay still.”

She obeys, not wanting her mangled wrists to get even more injured. It’s silent for a moment as he saws at the rope. “Don’t even think about running, by the way. There’s a dozen men outside,” Hux warns her.

“You didn’t answer my question,” she says lowly, a chill shooting up her spine with renewed vigor. It’s so cold in this place, she has to tense her muscles to stop from shivering.

“You aren’t dying on the full moon,” Hux answers. The rope gives way suddenly, and she lets her arms fall with relief, examining her wrists. They’re in bad shape, rubbed raw from the friction and stained with blood.

“Come on.” He stands, tucking the knife away and holding out his hand as if to help her to her feet. She stares at his palm, refusing to take his assistance.

“Why are you doing this? Why work for the First Order?” Mara asks quickly, trying to give him a pleading look. She sees his jaw clench beneath his beard, and he drops his eyes from hers. “You don’t have to do this, please-”

Hux grabs her hands, forcing her to her feet. “There’s much more at play here than you realize.”

Mara protests as he forces her forward, both her arms in his grip, towards that archway in the curving wall. “You have to know this is wrong, whatever you’re doing here, it’s not right-” she rambles.

When he drags her through the arch, a bag descends over her head. It pitches her into blackness, and she falls silent. Hux’s arm around her shoulders is the only thing keeping her moving, guiding her as she stumbles along.

She tries not to sniffle, to keep her breathing even out of some sort of lingering pride. Right now, it’s all she has left. She feels cold and broken, her hope destroyed more and more, from the moment she woke up. Her thoughts travel to Kylo, however, and her control shatters. The tears escape once again, trailing over her face. 

“Kylo?” she mumbles, turning her head towards where she can feel Hux’s body against her shoulder. “Is Kylo…Is he dead?”

Hux says nothing, and Mara feels like she’s deflating, crumpling inward. The thought of him lying somewhere, cold and unmoving, numbs her. She shuffles along, barely noticing when the chill leaves her skin. The air grows warm, the material of the bag brightening when sun hits it. She feels nothing, fumbling when Hux nudges her to climb up into something. A door slams closed.

**Hours Later**

Hux didn’t restrain her again, but it hardly matters. There are no windows in the back of the van, the doors locked from the outside. She balls up the sack they’d shoved over her head, squeezing the fabric in her fists. She They’ve been driving forever. At least it feels like forever, the ache in her chest growing as she thinks about Kylo.

She barely got to know him, and yet the grief is nearly swallowing her whole as she tries to keep it together. There had been that feeling...the one that made her feel connected to him when she gave in to her intuition. Thinking of him dead makes her physically hurt, and she tries repeatedly to think of something, anything else. How had the First Order found her?

Mara goes back through the events in her head, but she can’t figure out where they went wrong. What was their fatal mistake?

Her mind runs to the leader of the First Order, the walking horror who looked like a reanimated, alien corpse. How had he been projecting himself? She hadn’t noticed any electronic equipment in the room to do that. Not to mention, how had he choked her? She’d felt it, as real as if hands were wrapped around her neck.

…Could magic actually be real? Was her mother onto something?

The van slows down to make a turn, and she notices the vehicle doesn’t accelerate to its prior speeds afterwards. The road sounds different, as well. Mara straightens up, listening intently. She knows that sound. They’ve left pavement behind, the road they now drive along is made of gravel.

She waits, anxiety growing, as they travel along for a while longer. Occasionally she can feel the vehicle shifting as the road curves, as one point making another turn. Finally, it slows to a stop. She stops fiddling with the fabric in her hand, frozen and waiting.

The doors swing open, and Mara immediately frowns with confusion when she looks beyond Hux’s exhausted face. It’s nearly dark out, the sun has almost set. How long had she been unconscious before waking up? She feels like it's only been a few hours, and yet it must be the end of the next day. 

“Don’t make me drag you out,” Hux complains when she doesn't move, holding out a hand impatiently to help her down. She ignores him, jumping down on her own. They’ve stopped somewhere in the woods, their location nearly surrounded with tall pine trees. The undergrowth is dense with ferns, fireflies flashing intermittently. 

Mara tries to examine her surroundings more, but Hux grabs her arm once again to force her to move. He pulls her around the van, ushering her towards a wooden cottage in the clearing. There are already men patrolling around it, rifles held at the ready. They are dressed like the ones who had attacked the police station, and she swallows nervously as they pass by. Are they here to shoot her if she tries to escape?

They reach the door, and Hux releases her to swing it open. Mara wishes she could identify their most likely location based on the woods around them. But she has no idea what state they are in. If she could get away and make a run for it, how far until she reaches a road or town she knows? Does it even matter if she’s lost in the forest? If she can just get away-

“Inside, please,” Hux requests, nodding through the door.

She stares at him for a moment, holding his tired blue gaze resentfully. But his expression is nearly unreadable in the quickly growing darkness. Mara huffs with defeat, stepping into the cottage. She has to bide her time, she thinks. If she just waits for the right opportunity, maybe she can escape. Hux shuts the door behind her, staying outside to speak to one of the men on patrol.

**Later**

The cottage is small, only three rooms and sparsely decorated. Mara’s searched it thoroughly, only to be disappointed by the results. The windows are all barred, and the only door is the one still being guarded. She tore through the kitchen drawers and cupboards, looking for a weapon. But they’re mostly empty, failing to provide her with even a paring knife.

The bathroom is similarly empty, save for a nearly depleted roll of toilet paper. She’d considered locking herself in the tiny room, but the doorknob didn’t even have a lock on it.

Mara ends up pacing across the living space, refusing to sit down on the old furniture. It’s completely dark out now, the windows nearly black. They must be far out in the country, wherever they are. The only lights in the cottage come from two bare bulbs, one in the main space and a second in the bathroom.

She looks up when the door opens, and Hux enters. He approaches the little dining table, sitting down a bag and unzipping it.

“How long are you planning to keep me here?” Mara asks.

“Not long,” he replies, pulling a first aid kit from the bag and taking a seat at the table. “Can you sit down?”

“No.” She resumes her pacing, ignoring the irritated sigh the redheaded man gives.

“I need you to sit down,” Hux tries again. “Or else.”

“Or else what? What!?” she snaps angrily, stopping her pacing to glare murderously at him. “Or else you’ll kidnap me? You’ll hold me prisoner in a shack in the woods!? Too fucking late, you already did that!”

“Calm down-”

“No! Fuck you and fuck Supreme Shitwad,” she hisses. Mara spots a pair of metal scissors in the first aid kit, and she throws herself at the table suddenly. She is irrationally intent on grabbing them and driving them into his chest.

Hux seems to read her mind, snapping them away from her grasp a moment before she can reach them. He stands quickly, the chair thudding over in back of him. “ _Stop!_ ”

The anger dies in her muscles as she staggers to a stop, her fingers falling away from the plastic case of medical supplies. Something in his voice made her comply, and she stares at him dumbly.

“Sit down, please. So I can clean your wounds,” Hux requests, his tone suggesting forced patience.

Mara jerks the chair opposite him out, dropping down into it. Her anger had come on suddenly, but disappeared just as quickly, and she’s left feeling confused. Hux takes his jacket off, standing his chair back up to toss it over the back.

She holds her wrists out when he sits, cringing as he splashes alcohol over the wounds. She tries to focus on the liquid spilled on the table beneath her skin, but it burns. Mara grits her teeth until the stinging lessens slightly.

“The anger is only going to get worse,” he says quietly, applying antibacterial cream to a bandage. She relaxes slightly when the cream stops the rest of the sting, but her wrists still throb lightly with pain as he continues. “I can help you with that.”

“Are you a fake therapist too?” she remarks derisively.

“No. But I know what it’s like to-”

Hux stops speaking mid-sentence when the howl pierces the night outside. Chills shoot across Mara’s skin at the sound, a long, eerie wail. It seems to stretch on forever, growing louder as she stares at the front door.

Hux staggers to stand up, his face paling. She notices the way his lips press into a taut line, tension obvious in his posture.

“What’s the matter, Marshal? Are you scared of wolves?” she breathes, meaning to taunt him. But she fails to use a properly snarky tone, her own heart racing as the howl finally dies down. Silence takes its place.

“This isn’t exactly how I wanted this to go,” he remarks, bending over to begin unlacing his boots.

Mara stares, taken aback by the action. What is he doing? She’s about to ask, but stops when gunfire erupts from somewhere outside. It’s brief before it pauses, only to resume again a minute later. The gunshots cut off for a second time, as Hux pulls his boots off. She watches, utterly bewildered, as he begins unbuttoning his shirt.

“What the fuck are you-” Mara tries to ask, but she jerks into silence when a man screams somewhere in front of the cottage. The sharp shriek is followed by a garbled noise. She stands up, backing away from the door and windows.

Hux tugs his shirt off, dropping it hastily to the floor, and her eyes fly to the necklace around his neck. Mara's mouth drops open when she sees the stone that had been tucked beneath his clothing. It’s exactly the same as hers, a labradorite pendant.

He tugs at the chain, dropping the necklace onto the table. Mara stares in shock as he unbuttons his jeans, but it’s no longer the fact that he’s undressing that’s stunned her. It’s that something is rippling across his skin. Or more aptly, moving beneath it. Cold horror hits her as she sees the muscles jumping in his back, the bones shifting. There’s a cracking noise as his back contorts, before Hux collapses onto all fours on the floor. She finds the air to scream when his head cranes back, jaw opening wide and elongating.


	14. Chapter 14

Pointed canines erupt from Hux's gums, about the same time that rusty brown fur creeps across his skin. There’s a chorus of bones snapping and popping as he turns, the joints of his legs reversing with a grating sound. She has never seen something so disturbingly grotesque as this process, the features of a large, but lanky wolf emerging rapidly.

Mara keeps backing up, running into the wall and pressing herself against it. Claws scrape against the floor as the man Hux had once been finishes disappearing, replaced with a beast. While it’s less monstrous than the first wolf she’d seen, there is enough slender muscle to his frame to suggest danger. For a moment he appears confused, staggering sideways on the wooden flooring as he gets his bearings.

Something slams into the front door of the cabin, the wood splintering under the force. Hux’s fur bristles at the sound, hackles standing up along the shoulders. The slight whimpering noise that had been trailing from his throat changes pitch, dropping into a rumbling growl.

Hux shakes his head, standing up straight and snarling at the door as something impacts it a second time. The wood gives, huge shards of it snapping off along the jam. The scream stops short in Mara’s throat at the sight of the wolf that steps through the remains of door. Rather than some nightmarish creature, the oversized black wolf is instantly familiar to her. Could it be…?

“Kylo?” she gasps. It has to be him. He’s broader than Hux’s wolf form, heavily muscled, dark fur wet with what she can only guess is blood. She’d assumed the worst, that he’d been killed when she was taken. But she dares to hope now, frozen in place despite the urge to run to him. 

The black wolf’s glowing red eyes flicker to her, and the moment they meet hers, she _knows_ that it’s Kylo. That instinctive feeling, deep down in her brain, screams at her in recognition. Relief floods her body, but it’s short lived. Hux snarls again, shifting in front of her as if to block her from Kylo’s advance.

Kylo’s attention flips back to the wolf in front of Mara at the sound. His lips curl back on his muzzle, baring dangerously long fangs as his ears pin back. A deep growl reverberates from the black wolf, and Mara shivers at the electricity it sends dancing through her body.

For one tense moment, the two monstrous animals seem to be locked into a standoff. She looks passed Kylo’s shape, trying to see beyond him to the outside. None of the men with guns are rushing to the cabin… It seems to only be the three of them. She doesn’t want to think about what it means… or what Kylo did to them…But it doesn’t look like Hux has any backup on the way.

“Let me go,” Mara says suddenly, speaking to the back of Hux’s rusty brown head. If he can understand her, perhaps he can be reasoned with. “I think you’re alone out here…”

She edges sideways, trying to get out from behind him, closer to Kylo. “You don’t have to fight, just please let me go-”

When she tries to dart around him, Hux snaps at her. She recoils even as his teeth come nowhere close to her. It was more of a warning to stop her movement than an actual attempt to bite her. But Kylo sees the action and reacts furiously, snarling as he lunges forward. He goes for Hux’s throat, and the smaller wolf only spares his life with a fast, reflexive twisting motion to shelter his neck.

Kylo slams him backwards regardless, the wall giving under the weight as Hux’s body collides with it. The dry wall is left cracked and crumbling. Hux collapses in front of it, pinned beneath the larger wolf’s snapping teeth as Kylo tears into him.

Mara darts away from the pair, having enough sense in the moment to flee from the supernaturally large wolves’ path of destruction. They writhe and twist, biting into each other in a massive heap of fur. Hux kicks out, attempting to free himself from under Kylo’s weight and they roll, slamming into a chair and knocking it sideways. Hux cries out in pain as Kylo’s teeth catch and rip his flesh, but he shelters his throat and belly despite the relentless attack. Kylo’s enraged noises are terrifying, his red eyes looking possessed. 

Mara wants to run straight out the front door, but hesitates at the sight of Hux’s crumpled up clothing on the floor. Her eyes land on the holster peeking from underneath the edge of his jacket. She kneels, fumbling with the clasp until she has the gun in her hand. The handle feels heavy enough that she thinks it’s loaded.

A pained cry catches her attention, and she spots the brownish wolf tearing itself loose from Kylo’s teeth. Blood splatters from the wound it’s just torn wider in its escape, but it seems Hux is desperate enough to not care about his own injury. He pivots quickly and sinks his jaws into Kylo’s shoulder.

Mara throws herself out of the way, a moment before the black wolf is thrown into the table at her side. Kylo’s head slams into the ground when it collapses under his weight, the legs snapping out from under the table top. The gun goes skittering away from her in her fall and she crawls after it, desperate to have some sort of weapon to defend herself. She throws herself to her feet, searching for a steady grip on the gun despite how foreign it is to her.

Kylo’s fur is soaked and matting with blood, as he tries to stagger to his feet from the broken table. Mara realizes, heart sinking, that he’s badly hurt. Did Hux manage to inflict that much damage? Or was it the gunshots she’d heard just minutes ago? She rounds on Hux with the gun extended, a desperate protectiveness rising in her.

The brown wolf is faring even worse than Kylo. Blood soaks Hux’s shoulders, open wounds decorating his body from where Kylo’s teeth and claws had dug in. The floor of the cabin is quickly growing messy with splatters and smears of crimson liquid.

Hux’s red eyes flicker over Kylo, sizing up his enemy. He takes a step towards Kylo before she fumbles to find the trigger, pulling it the moment she locates it. Mara’s aim is poor, her hands shaking as she tries to point the weapon at Hux’s chest. She flinches when she fires, nearly dropping it before tightening her grip once more. But Hux cries out, reassuring her that the shot must have hit him somewhere.

The brown wolf turns to her, snarling. The single bullet doesn’t seem to have done much to him, and she readies herself to fire again. But Hux is distracted, and doesn’t notice Kylo regaining his footing until it’s too late. This time when the black wolf lunges, it sinks its teeth straight into Hux’s neck.

The brown wolf thrashes, trying to shake off Kylo’s jaws. More red is flung in fat droplets, a muffled growl coming from Kylo’s face buried into Hux’s fur. For a moment, it looks like the fight is over as Hux can’t seem to escape. Blood drips steadily from his neck into a mess on the floor as Kylo only sinks his teeth deeper.

But then a gunshot goes off behind Mara, startling her as the shot grazes Kylo in the side. He flinches in pain, losing his grip on Hux. She turns to see one of the men from earlier aiming a rifle at the pair of wolves. He looks injured, leaning against the broken door frame. He doesn’t even seem to notice her standing there, his attention fixated on the much larger threat of the werewolves. He’s bloodied, one of his legs looks mauled. Yet his face is determined as he prepares to fire at Kylo a second time.

Mara doesn’t even think. She can’t let him hurt Kylo any more. She raises the gun, squeezing the trigger, feeling like she’s both hyper focused and dazed out of her mind. She’s still squeezing it when the man collapses, and she realizes she is no longer firing. The gun is empty, she doesn’t even know how many bullets have left it.

She drops the weapon accidentally when the blur of fur knocks her down. Hux flees through the open door, taking the distraction as a chance for survival. The brown wolf jumps over the fallen body, nearly falling on an injured leg. It recovers and staggers out, making for the dark woods not far from the door. She only tracks him for a second before he might as well be invisible, the darkness of the night swallowing Hux up. 

Kylo growls lowly, stepping forward as if to pursue. But he limps on one of his front legs, unsteady. Mara searches his massive body, but between the poor lighting and black fur, she can’t assess how badly he is hurt. He’s still standing, at least, but she’s worried enough that it barely reassures her. They need to get out of this situation, she thinks, to get somewhere safe.

“We need to get out of here,” she tells him urgently. Kylo’s eyes flicker to hers, then stubbornly back to the door. He growls again.

“You’re hurt. We need to get out of here,” Mara repeats firmly, mind made up.

There’s no use in pursuing Hux, not when they have an opportunity to escape. When Kylo looks at her again, his red eyes have dimmed to their normal brown color. The wolf comes forward, and she freezes when he drops his massive head to press it into her stomach.

He whines softly at the contact, and Mara hesitantly raises her hands to his fur. He’s covered in blood, his coat sticky. She ignores it, wrapping her arms around him as best she can.

**Ten Minutes Later**

Mara stumbles in the dark, but she can’t see much around them. They’ve been staggering along what barely constitutes a road for a little ways now, the lights of the cabin vanishing behind them. Kylo limps along by her side, his breathing heavy with pain and exertion. She stops, looking at the wolf worriedly.

“We could have checked the bodies for keys, one of them had to have the ones to the van,” she suggests again. He’d ignored her the first time she tried to tell him this, and he ignores it again.

Kylo merely nudges his head into her side, encouraging her onward. “You’re bleeding really badly,” she objects quietly. “We can’t be walking through the woods forever with you hurt-”

Kylo whines, bumping her arm forward with his muzzle. She sighs and continues on obediently, trying to stay calm. A few more minutes pass, her anxiety rising with concern for him. She has no idea where they are, or how long they have until reinforcements show up from the First Order. Kylo’s pushing himself, but she can tell he’s having a hard time continuing on with his injuries.

But then she sees it ahead, a shape slightly darker than the surroundings. Her pace picks up when she makes out Kylo’s truck, stopped there on the gravel. Mara rushes forward, spotting his clothing laying on the ground in front of the truck. When she picks up the shirt, she realizes it’s shredded into tatters. The rest of his clothing is similarly destroyed.

She gathers it up, along with his boots laying abandoned by the front tire. Mara throws the backdoor of the truck open, shoving his belongings back there. She moves out of the way when Kylo staggers forward, heaving himself up onto the backseat. He collapses half on the seat and half on top of their bags on the floor, his body already starting to shift back to human.

The black fur shrinks, revealing more and more pale skin instead. It’s covered in streaks of blood, both fresh and drying. Mara winces at the cracking of bone, intermixed with Kylo’s groans of pain. The transformation sounds painful, or perhaps it’s just his injuries making the whole thing torturous. She hovers outside the door, half reaching for him with uncertainty. She wants to comfort him, even as the sight of his muzzle shrinking back into his face is disturbingly strange.

Kylo has wounds in several places, and she wonders if he’ll heal quickly or if he needs medical treatment. There’s a bullet hole in his shoulder, another one looks like it has grazed the side of his abdomen. There are ragged wounds from Hux’s teeth that hang open with raw edges. Mara averts her gaze before it can travel below his waist. His nudity takes her aback, even as Kylo seems to care less about it.

“Keys are in the ignition,” he groans, letting his head thump down onto the seat. His voice is muffled as he lays on his stomach, the expanse of his back marred with scratches. “Drive west to get to the freeway.”

She hesitates for a moment, wondering if she should try to cover him. But he’s laying on top of his ruined clothing, one of his legs kicked out over his bag.

“Drive, Mara,” he mutters. “I’ll be fine.”

Mara shuts the back door, climbing into the driver’s seat. The keys are there as he said, and she turns them in the ignition. But her feet don’t even reach the pedals, the steering wheel practically beyond her reach. The whole seat is cranked back to accommodate his much larger size, and she hurries to adjust it so she can even drive.

Kylo falls silent as she puts the car into gear and starts down the road, headed away from the cabin. She adjusts the rearview mirror as they bump along the rough road, trying to see him in the back. But it’s almost too dark without turning on the interior light, and he isn’t moving much.

“Y-you okay?” Mara asks hesitantly, not liking how still he is. He looks like he’s lost a lot of blood.

“Never been better…” Kylo mumbles sarcastically, voice rough with pain.

She eases the truck to a faster speed, trying to get used to driving it. It’s a lot bigger than her car, and her hands are trembling on the steering wheel as she approaches an intersection. There’s a post where a stop sign should be, but it looks like someone stole the sign itself long ago. She slows down, pondering which direction to go for west.

Mara’s about to ask how she’s even supposed to know what direction they’re headed, when she sees the display on the dashboard. It’s right beneath the speedometer. They’re pointed north-northeast, so she turns left. They are far out in the woods, the trees dense around them. The road they’re on looks like it’s practically a tunnel carved through the forest, the branches overhead almost obscuring the night sky.

“Should I try to find a hospital, whenever we get back to civilization?” she asks nervously.

They hit a bump in the road, and Kylo swears. She darts a glance into the rearview to see him shaking his head. His face is buried, only his dark hair visible as he refuses the suggestion. “No. I’ll heal. No hospitals,” he grumbles.

His voice is weak, and she tries to focus on driving as quickly as she safely can. In the span of a few hours, she’s gone from thinking Kylo dead, to seeing him alive, to worrying that he’s bleeding to death in his own truck. Her grip tightens on the wheel as she wishes she would have shot Hux more, angry at him for hurting Kylo. And for finding her, for taking her to meet that freakish projection of a person who had hurt her…

How had Hux even found her in the first place? One of Mara’s hands flies to her neck as she suddenly remembers. She grabs at the pendant dangling there as she hits the brakes. The stone’s temperature is regular now, no longer the shocking cold it had been when Hux snatched her from the motel.

Had the necklace somehow been warning her when it grew unnaturally cold? Or had Hux used it to find her, in some weird, magical way?

Mara thinks of that matching necklace he’d worn, hitting the button to roll down the window. She can’t take any chances. There’s no good reason why the fake marshal would have the same necklace as her… Her mother had given it to her. Why would someone with the First Order have an identical one?

Unless…She doesn’t want to think it, but the question seems to be the most likely conclusion. Was her mother connected to the First Order, or Hux? …Or both?

Mara jerks harshly at the necklace until it comes loose, giving one last look at the labradorite stone. It’s innocuous looking, the headlights of the truck barely giving enough light to see the dancing blue shades in its depths. But she’s too paranoid to keep it, narrowing her eyes at it as if the stone can somehow sense her glare.

She flings the necklace out the window, aiming for the trees along the side of the road. Then she presses her foot to the gas pedal, swallowing against the lump in her throat. Mara can’t drive away from the harsh suspicion she feels for her mother now. But she might as well try.

**Later**

It seems like forever before the woods get sparser, the sky opening up above them. But eventually Mara comes across the freeway, getting on it and driving until she sees a 24-hour pharmacy. Kylo’s silent as she pulls into the parking lot. When she stops the truck in a spot, she twists around in her seat. She can see his breathing, and for a moment she just watches it. He looks passed out.

Mara stretches backwards, reaching until she can grab his wrist and wrap her fingers around it. Kylo’s pulse beats strong there, reassuring her. But the wounds she can see still look terrible. How long does it take a werewolf to heal? She decides to at least try to bandage up the worst of it.

Mara tries to gently move his leg off his bag, mentally swearing at how heavy just that one limb is. She unzips the duffle, not having to search for long before she finds the envelope of cash. She slips a bill out, hoping he doesn’t mind, before exiting the truck. The parking lot is nearly deserted except for a single car in the opposite corner, and she power walks to the door of the store.

A tired looking cashier gives her a halfhearted nod when she enters, grabbing a basket. She locates the first aid aisle quickly enough, squinting in the too-bright fluorescent lights. Then she grabs what she needs as fast as she can spot it. Bandages, gauze, tape, alcohol and antibiotic cream get thrown in the plastic basket, and she hesitates before grabbing up some painkiller as well. She has no idea if they’ll work on a werewolf, but it’s worth a shot.

She hurries to the front, adding bottles of water and cheap paper towels to her haul before hesitating at the seasonal section. There are rubber flip flops, citronella candles and flower pattern paper plates and plastic cups. She looks passed all that to the summer themed beach towels. Unfortunately, they’re all feminine patterns, but she grabs one anyway.

The cashier takes forever counting out change, before bagging up the items for her. Mara forces herself to walk regularly to the door, before giving up and nearly jogging to the truck.

She climbs carefully into the backseat, trying to straddle Kylo’s long limbs in an awkward position. She ends up kneeling on top of her suitcase on the floor. She rips the plastic ties holding together the ladybug-patterned towel, draping it over his lower half before getting to work. Kylo comes to with the first splash of alcohol.

“Fuck,” he complains in a sleepy slur. “What’re you doing?”

“Trying to patch you up,” she admits.

“Don’t bother.”

“I know you’re a big strong werewolf,” Mara attempts to tease him, trying to make her voice stop wavering. She fails, her anxiety audible, as she doubles up on a bandage over the worst of his bite wounds. “But some of these are still bleeding out, it’s going to look like a murder scene in your truck.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” Kylo retorts half-heartedly.

She ignores his rebuttal to continue her work in silence, but pauses when she gets to what is clearly a bullet hole. “Did the bullet even come back out? What if you need surgery?” she asks uncertainly. Truthfully, she has no idea what she is doing. He really should be going to a hospital, not letting her play doctor in the dark.

Kylo tries to shrug the shoulder in question, hissing with pain. “Oh, it definitely came the fuck out,” he growls lowly. “Feels like it hit the bone, too.”

Mara wrinkles up her nose in disgust, surveying the part of his face she can see. For all of her concern, Kylo just looks irritated. “That sounds really serious-”

“Trust me, just shove some gauze on it. I just need time,” Kylo insists, half rolling over.

Mara sighs, but does as he requested before helping him roll the rest of the way over so she can finish the job. She gets as much blood off him as she can, given that she’s working with bottled water and a roll of paper towels. Some of it looks like it didn’t even come from his wounds, particularly the crimson stain on his lips. It could be Hux’s, or the men from outside the cabin…

Her heart feels like it spasms when she remembers shooting one of the men herself. She’d nearly blocked it out, but the memory and accompanying guilt comes rushing back. Mara’s hands are stained red when she’s done bandaging Kylo. He’s unconscious again before she finishes rinsing the blood off her hands in the parking lot.

**Hours Later**

It’s after 2 AM when Mara spots the sign for a motel. She pulls off, helping herself to more cash from Kylo’s bag. She doesn’t dare try to use any of her own credit or bank cards, so she doesn’t really have any other options.

The front desk is deserted, but a younger man shows up to it a minute after she enters, probably alerted by the bell over the door. He looks half asleep, his eyes red-rimmed enough to suggest he’s more than a little high. She chews at her lip nervously when he just stares at her, saying nothing.

“I need a room, just for the night,” Mara starts.

“King or Queens?”

“Anything, it doesn’t matter,” she answers.

“Alright. Nightly rate is 110,” he says, sounding bored. “I need your driver’s license and credit card.”

Mara frowns. “Can’t I pay in cash?”

He raises his eyebrows, his eyes roving down over her figure, taking in her disheveled state. “Um. No, I have to have a credit card on file.”

She looks away, frustration growing, mind reeling for a moment. Mara feels like she’s about ready to snap. She steps forward, smacking all three hundred-dollar bills down onto the desk. “How about you keep the extra cash, and then you don’t need a credit card or driver’s license for tonight. Deal?”

The guy eyes up the bills before he shrugs. “Fuck it. They pay me like shit anyway.” 

Mara leaves the little office victorious, room key in hand. Kylo’s stirring when she gets back. He blinks at her in confusion when she swings the back door open, but seems less disoriented than the last time they’d stopped. 

“Where were you?” Kylo asks, wincing as he pushes himself up.

“Getting us a room,” she explains, dangling the key from her hand to show him. “Do you need help?”

“No,” he says, but she can see the pain lacing his face as he tries to shift down off the seat. She takes his forearm, helping him ease forward without using his other, injured shoulder.

Kylo seems to just now notice the towel she’s thrown over his waist, looking down at it curiously. “Ladybugs?”

Mara gives him an apologetic look. “They didn’t have anything more… manly.”

He gathers the material more securely around his waist, sliding down with a wince from the seat. “Who says ladybugs aren’t manly?” he scoffs. “I think I pull it off.”

“You can rock a ladybug towel,” Mara humors him.

She grabs his duffle bag when he clears the truck, heaving it onto her shoulder. He’ll need clean clothes once he’s feeling better, and she’s less concerned with her own overly packed bags at the moment. Kylo staggers, shooting a hand out to prop himself up on the side of the truck.

Mara steps closer, wrapping her free arm around his waist. He lets her help him along, shoving the truck door closed as they make their way down the sidewalk. The rooms are numbered, and they luckily don’t have far to go.

If she weren’t so concerned for him, she might find their appearance together a lot more entertaining. She knows she looks awful, can feel the dirt on her face and hair from her less than wonderful experience with the First Order. And Kylo looks nearly ridiculous, covered in bandages in his pink towel, his hair a messy wreck. He sees her eyeing him up and smirks at her. The expression is way too cocky given his current state, and she looks away self-consciously. 

“This isn’t the weirdest thing I’ve limped to bed in, you know,” Kylo offers.

“No? What beats it?” she asks, partially just to have something to talk about. Anything to distract her from the far worse things she could be mulling over.

“First time I changed, I was maybe thirteen? I woke up hours away from home, naked in the woods,” he explains. They pause when they reach their door, and Mara has to try twice to get it unlocked.

“That sounds awkward,” she mentions, dropping his duffle for him on the carpet inside.

“Yeah. The closest house I found, I broke in to try to get some clothes,” Kylo continues. “Only it was an old lady’s house.”

Mara smiles reluctantly, but Kylo sees it as he lets himself drop gingerly onto the bed. He grins, flopping his head back. “Nothing would have fit, except for this purple, floral robe. So I ended up walking along the road home, trying to hitchhike, wearing an old lady’s robe that I stole.”

She locks the door, trying not to laugh at the mental image. Shouldn’t she be trying to make him feel better, not the other way around? “You’re hurt, why are you the one trying to cheer _me_ up?”

The grin slides off Kylo’s face, his expression darkening. He looks away from her, his gaze slipping over the room instead. “It’s the least I can do.”

“What?”

Kylo sighs, shutting his eyes. “It’s my fault they got you. I wandered too far off when I changed. I didn’t mean to-“

She interrupts him. “It’s not your fault. I think it’s possible Hux tracked my necklace.”

Kylo’s eyes snap open, narrowing with confusion. “What?”

“He had a necklace just like mine…Like the one my mom gave me, when I was little.” She sits on the floor, reluctant to get on the bed in her dirt covered clothes. “This is going to sound weird, but it was getting cold. Right before they grabbed me, it was like ice.”

Kylo grunts with pain as he shoves himself up to scrutinize her. “Why would one of them have a necklace like your mother gave you?”

“I’m trying not to think about that…” She mutters. “But it’s the only way I can figure that they found us.” Mara realizes she’s tired, on a level that sleep probably won’t help.

“Where is it now? The necklace?”

“I threw it out the window, back in the woods.”

“Good…” Kylo says uncertainly. He rolls his injured shoulder before cringing and giving up.

She suppresses a yawn, stretching uncomfortably. Her back is tight, the muscles feel like they have knots in them. “Do you need anything? For the pain? I mean all I could get is Advil…”

“No. Why are you staying on the floor?” Kylo asks.

Mara shrugs. “My clothes are dirty and I’m too lazy to go get my bags from the truck.”

“So borrow something of mine, and get up here,” he suggests, making a face as he tries to resettle on his back.

Mara debates her options, before giving in. Searching through his bag, she turns up t-shirts and a disconcertingly large number of flannels. She grabs one, figuring it’s long enough to cover her underwear, and shuts herself into the bathroom. The mirror above the sink confirms her suspicions, she looks absolutely exhausted and beat up.

She’s got smudged dirt and blood on her, though the bandages on her wrists have stayed relatively clean. There’s a faint bruise on her throat from when she’d choked, despite the fact that no one actually wrapped their hands around her neck. Mara tears her eyes away from her reflection to stare into the sink basin, not wanting to think about the Supreme Leader and what had happened with him…

She’s too drained to bother showering, but she tries to wash up in the sink. Mara leaves her dirty clothes in a pile on the floor, buttoning up Kylo’s flannel. It hangs around her thighs as she’d expected, though her hands are nearly lost in the sleeves if she doesn’t push them up.

When she goes back into the room, Kylo looks asleep. The blankets are pulled up over his waist messily. She flips off the lights, crawling onto the bed next to him but leaving space between them. Kylo makes a noise of protest, turning onto his side to get closer to her.

“I thought you were asleep,” she breathes.

“I couldn’t sleep yet,” Kylo murmurs, though his voice betrays him. It’s husky with sleepiness, as if he’d been fighting to stay awake.

“Why? Are you in pain?” Mara asks anxiously. 

“Terrible pain,” he mutters, looping an arm around her waist to pull her closer. She stares at him, uncertain if he’s being serious or not as he slinks further down the mattress.

“I told you, I bought painkillers-” she begins to remind him.

But Kylo nuzzles his head onto her chest, burying his face against the fabric covering her breasts. “Ah, that’s it. The pain is completely gone,” he rasps. “It’s a miracle.”

A soft laugh of disbelief leaves her, before she shakes her head at the dark ceiling. “Glad my chest could help.”

Kylo sighs with content, his fingers wrapping around her hip. It sends a small shiver down her spine, and she licks her lips nervously as she dares to touch his hair. She brushes her fingers gently through the ends of the dark locks, pushing it back from his face. His breathing gets deeper and slower, as he seems to fall asleep quickly.

Mara keeps playing with his hair, before allowing herself to duck her face down against it. But her mind is persistent, keeping her awake as the night ticks on. It fixates on that necklace that had hung around Armitage Hux’s neck. She remembers his words as he’d untied her. _I’m your only friend here…_


	15. Chapter 15

Mara tries to turn away from the sunlight striking her eyelids, but she finds she can’t quite move in the bed. Kylo’s weight is pinning her down, his face burrowed into her side. She’d finally found sleep, quite a while after he had passed out. But now that the sun has roused her, she can’t help but think they should leave soon. There isn’t nearly enough space between them and the Order to relax.

Mara peels her eyelids open to peek down, spotting Kylo’s dark hair and his wrist, his hand disappearing under the hiked-up flannel she’s wearing. The rest of him is buried beneath the sheets, his feet comically hanging off the end of the bed. Mara tries to slide over, but his grip on her side turns stubborn and he murmurs in protest.

“We should get up,” she points out quietly, voice thick with sleep. “We have to keep moving...”

She feels Kylo heave a sigh before his hand dares to slide higher over her skin, his thumb grazing her ribs beneath her breast. His touch is light, raising goosebumps with how gently he traces her body. Her eyes want to slide back shut, to focus on his skin trailing hers.

Instead, she wiggles upwards, trying to escape in that direction. She knows exactly what will happen if she lets this continue. After the nightmare of yesterday, she can’t afford to let the Order catch up to them. But Kylo resists her escape, nuzzling the material of her shirt even higher with his nose. His breath is warm against her exposed belly, and Mara fights a shiver.

“Can I wake up like this every morning?” he breathes sleepily.

“Injured in a crappy motel?” she asks, letting her head fall back against the headboard.

“Nn,” Kylo mumbles a negative noise, shaking his head. He shifts the sheets down further, rubbing his cheek across her as he kisses any exposed place he can find. His mouth caresses near her hip bone, just above the top of her panties, his motions lazy and slow.

Her breath catches at the way the rough stubble on his chin feels on her sensitive skin, how it contrasts with his soft lips that he drags leisurely over her. Mara’s wide awake now, her heart speeding up at his actions. “Kylo…”

He blinks up at her beneath dark lashes before continuing, trailing teasing kisses up her stomach. He pauses when he reaches the juncture of the shirt, still bunched up over her breasts. He presses one last kiss there, sending shivers up her spine, before resting his chin on her. His expression is challenging, unapologetic as he meets her gaze. 

“I want to rip these clothes off you,” Kylo breathes.

Mara swallows hard, licking her lips at the boldness of his statement. Kylo doesn’t look away, doesn’t soften what he’s said with a smile. His eyes hold hers stubbornly as his hand slides down her side, fingers catching in the material of her panties.

“Rip them off and kiss you, mark you everywhere,” he continues, voice rough with desire.

Red sparks dance in the brown of Kylo’s irises when he bends to kiss her again, nudging the shirt even higher with his nose. His eyes dare her to stop him, but she doesn’t. She’s too mesmerized by his gaze, enjoying his attention. The flick of his tongue between her breasts makes her shudder, his fingertips roaming her, exploring.

Mara’s thoughts are nonsensical, spinning. What is this feeling that he gives her? There isn’t even a word for it, but it’s addictive.

Kylo grabs her hips, tugging her down beneath him and propping himself over her neck. Her eyes clamp shut when he catches her throat with his mouth, his teeth dragging against her pulse. Heat washes through her veins, her whole body warming hurriedly to his advances.

That needy feeling intensifies, flooding her brain, urging her on. She’s never felt it with anyone else before, never felt anything like the hazy drug of Kylo’s touch. Her nerves flare with every kiss, and she arches into him, wanting more. Mara finds his arm, tracing her fingers up until she can wrap them around his bicep, hanging onto him and the sensations.

“You’ll let me mark you, won’t you?” Kylo growls softly against her skin, kissing up to her ear and back down. Her lips part to answer him, but she can’t find the words.

“Here?” he murmurs.

Her brow furrows a moment with confusion, before his teeth catch her skin. She cries out with surprise at the nip of pain, hips jerking with sharp pleasure it triggers. Kylo seals his lips over the bitten spot immediately, soothing it with his tongue. Though her body is already wanting more, as she willingly turns her head, opening her neck to him further.

Mara sinks her free hand into his hair, anchoring him closer. But there’s a small voice of reason in the back of her mind, reminding her what a real bite from him would mean. Is that what he’s asking? Why does him asking something that should horrify her always bring a surge of desire?

Mara shakes her head minutely, meaning to say no. She surprises herself when instead she mumbles, “N-not yet.”

Kylo practically purrs, his satisfaction rumbling from his throat as he kisses back down her chest, tugging buttons free as he goes. She’s clinging onto him anywhere she can reach, anticipation growing at the hungry look on his face.

“Not yet sounds a lot like eventually, yes,” he taunts, looking up when he reaches the last button clinging on over her cleavage.

The brilliant red of his gaze entrances her, makes her feel heady and needy. She can’t tear her eyes away from his, even when he rips that last button loose. He looks so striking. Those burning, otherworldly eyes contrasted with dark eyelashes, wild hair, and the sharp, pale features of his face.

“You want me to take you, don’t you?” Kylo asks.

Her core spasms with pleasure at the question, shocking her enough to make her breath hiss in sharply. She feels like she’s breathing too fast now, her head dizzy with the intensity of her arousal. He works his way back down her body, kissing her everywhere, little love bites intermingled with the caress of his lips. Her legs part on their own volition, splaying for him. He takes the chance to lay kisses on her inner thighs, before looking up to catch her watching him. 

Kylo smirks wickedly before he adds, “But not yet?”

Mara's skin heats with a blush at the teasing tone he uses. She becomes aware of how she's sprawled her legs, shifting into a position that's slightly less exposed. She tries to ignore her lust, to overrule it long enough to pinpoint the cause of her reluctance. She doesn’t feel safe yet, not after the close call of yesterday.

“It-it’s just, not here,” she stutters, trying to explain. “We aren’t safe here.”

Kylo sits back, toying with the edges of the flannel on her body. His crimson eyes fall from her face, roving down over her shape hungrily. But he finally relents, pulling the edges of the shirt back together for her. The red of his gaze leaving hers is enough to free her mind to function, like breaking some hypnotic spell. Her attention switches to the bandages she’d hurriedly applied to him the night before, and she frowns.

“Aren’t…aren’t you still hurt?” she asks, slipping her legs out from underneath him.

“No.” Kylo rips one of his bandages off, and she gapes at the sight of smooth, pale skin underneath. Mara sits up, reaching out to run her fingers over the muscle of his chest tentatively.

“That’s amazing,” she says quietly. There isn’t even a scar left where just hours ago, there’d been a jagged bite wound. “Do you always heal this fast?”

He catches her hand, lowering it from his chest to interlace his fingers with hers. “No. You helped.”

Her eyebrows shoot up with disbelief. “What? How?”

Kylo’s eyes search hers for a moment before dropping down to their joined hands. “You really don’t get it?”

What is there to get? Why is he always assuming she should understand all of this? “Um. No? Get what?”

“It’s how we are. We’re stronger together. Our powers…they’re amplified,” Kylo tries to explain.

“Like in a pack?” Mara asks curiously.

Kylo drops her hand as he shakes his head. She’s confused to see frustration cross his features. “No, Mara. Not a pack.”

She frowns when he gets up quickly, wrapped in his ridiculous lady bug towel and disappearing into the bathroom. She’s nearly positive she’s said something wrong, but doesn’t understand how. When Mara hears the shower start, she sighs, dropping back onto the bed. On impulse, she looks down at her wrists, and pulls at one of the bandages.

It comes loose, revealing that her injuries have disappeared. Only smooth skin is left, and she stares at her arm, while her stomach lurches with understanding.

Even with everything that’s happened, a part of her had been in denial. It had been stubborn, hanging on to the hope that perhaps this was all some mistake. But the sight of her completely vanished injury takes that last bit of denial, and shatters it. She’s healed, just as quickly as Kylo. She can’t deny it any longer. She’s something not entirely human.

**Not Much Later**

Mara feels a million times better after showering and changing into clean clothes, grateful to Kylo for bringing in her bags so she could get washed up. It feels strange, looking into the mirror and not seeing the necklace she’s worn since she was a child around her neck. Its absence is noticeable, but not necessarily in a bad way.

She almost feels lighter, less burdened somehow without the pendant. But when she emerges from the bathroom, it appears Kylo isn’t in the same uplifted mood. He’s on his phone. At the sight of her, he shoves it into his pocket, a scowl on his face.

“What is it?” Mara asks hesitantly.

“Nothing,” he replies. “I’m just wanted as a suspect in your disappearance, so that’s…great.”

Mara’s eyes widen at the news. “Fuck… I’m sorry.”

He shrugs. “It’s fine. Not the first time I’ve been wanted by authorities.”

Mara considers the potential complications from the police now searching for Kylo as well as her. “Should we still be using your truck? I mean if they’re looking for you, the license plate-”

“I changed it two states back,” Kylo reassures her.

“You…changed it? To what?” she asks, confused.

“To one that won’t be on the BOLO,” he explains.

Mara frowns, staring at him as she tries to process. Did he plan on having to change his license plate to avoid police? Who plans for something like that? Then again, who kept a packed bag and envelope of cash in their truck, ready to go at any time? Kylo raises his eyebrows questioningly at her expression.

“You’re kind of good at being a wanted man, is all,” she points out.

Kylo makes a derisive sound, but looks away uncomfortably. “Sorry. I’m sure that isn’t one of the qualities you were looking for in a mate.”

Mara’s heart sinks at his self-deprecating tone of voice. “Kylo…”

He doesn’t meet her eyes, raking his hand through his hair and looking instead at his duffle bag. “We should get going.”

Mara’s feet are moving before she even knows what she intends to do. She stops in front of Kylo to block him from reaching down for his bag. He looks doubtful, but she ignores it. Her heart is hammering in her chest with anxiety as she steps closer, up onto her tiptoes. The last thing she sees is Kylo’s gaze, uncertain, before she closes her eyes and lets her lips find his.

He kisses her back with a sweetness she wasn’t expecting, his fingertips finding her cheek and resting gently there. For a few moments, their lips meet with a chaste restraint. It’s almost like what she remembers a first kiss to be like, despite the fact that it isn't technically their first. It has that innocent quality, tentative and light. But then the control starts to slip, the feral lust returning as his clean, appealing scent registers to her. His kissing grows more adventurous, hungry, and she tastes him with the brush of his tongue. Mara pulls away before she can be lost to it, licking her lips as if she can trap his taste a little longer that way.

“Okay,” she says jokingly to break the silence. “Now we can go.”

The smile that lights up Kylo’s face is brilliant, and she finds herself grinning like an idiot in response. They gather up their bags and leave the motel room behind, headed down the sidewalk towards his truck. Mara feels sleepy still, a bit zoned out and probably in need of coffee. She doesn’t notice quickly enough when Kylo comes to a dead stop, dropping his bag.

Mara runs right into his back, jumping back in confusion to find her footing. “What’s wr-”

A violent growl leaves Kylo. She peers around his broad shoulders, concerned by his sudden change in mood. There, leaning against the front of the truck, is Armitage Hux. She’s stunned for a moment. How did he find them? Where is the rest of the Order’s forces?

Hux looks awful, disheveled and still wearing the same clothes she’d last seen him in. His beard, which had been neatly trimmed the first time they met, is now bordering on shaggy and unkempt. While his wounds aren’t gaping open, they are nowhere near healed the way that Kylo’s are. The ones she can see still look painful.

Hux holds up his hands in a nonthreatening gesture, but it doesn’t seem to defuse Kylo. Mara can actually see the muscles of Kylo’s back and arms tightening through the material of his t-shirt, his hands balling into fists at his side.

“I come in peace,” Hux says, voice hinting at sarcasm. When Kylo only growls again, the pitch dropping in register, Hux stands a little straighter. “Ren…” he says cautiously.

Kylo snaps, springing forward to grab Hux by the throat. Mara flinches at the sound Hux’s body makes when Kylo slams him onto the hood of the truck, restraining him in a choke hold. To make matters even worse, one of the doors further down the building opens. A man and a woman exit, the woman’s attention immediately drifting to the scene happening on Kylo’s truck. She looks concerned, tugging at her companion’s arm.

“Kylo, this is attracting attention,” Mara hisses urgently.

Though she’d probably be perfectly fine with watching Kylo continue to brutalize the fake marshal, she doesn’t need anyone calling the police on them. Kylo looks up and notices what she’s talking about, hauling Hux off the truck. She follows when he tugs the redheaded man along, forcing him towards their motel room.

“I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t know the bond had formed already,” Hux says urgently, voice now sounding hoarse.

Kylo ignores him to shove him into the room, and Mara follows. She turns to lock the door and put on the security chain, only to hear a loud thud. It’s followed by a groan of pain. When she turns back around, Hux is picking himself up off the floor. The drywall near the nightstand is cracked from where Kylo apparently threw him.

“You know, I haven’t healed yet from the last time you tried to murder me,” Hux complains, leaning against the wall and looking pained.

Kylo’s eyes are narrowed dangerously. “Good. That will make it easier to succeed this time.”

The redheaded man throws his hands up, face pleading, when Kylo starts for him again. “She’s yours, I get it! I won’t make the same mistake twice. Consider her off the market,” he rushes to say.

Kylo stops short of grabbing for Hux again, but he doesn’t look any less furious. Mara can only stare between them, not understanding this exchange. What bond was Hux referring to? Why are they talking like they know each other?

Kylo wrinkles up his nose with disgust as he surveys Hux, who attempts to stand a little straighter with a wince. “You smell like shit,” he accuses.

Hux narrows his eyes. “Scent blockers,” he retorts. “Otherwise, my pack could track me here. So, you’re welcome.”

Kylo bristles at the other man’s attitude. “Why the fuck are you here? If you think I’m going to let you take her-”

“No,” Hux interrupts. “I’m just here to tell you what I know. To try to help you.”

“Bullshit.”

“It’s not bullshit.”

Mara can’t watch their bickering any longer. She feels like she’s going to explode if she doesn’t get some answers. She can’t figure out what angle Hux is trying to play, but he’s lied before. He is clearly working for the Order. Whatever he is doing now, she concludes it has to be a trap. She steps closer to fix him with an accusing look, temper bubbling over.

“You are _full_ of shit! You took me to him! To Snoke!” she accuses, shaking with adrenaline. “You shoved a fucking bag over my head and drugged me, and drove me to some creepy ass place and tied me to a _fucking wall!_ If Kylo doesn’t kill you, I will.”

Hux’s face falls with guilt, but somehow that just makes her feel angrier. “I had to,” he insists. “They tracked you with magic. If I had refused to come after you, they would know I’m not loyal. I had to wait for the right chance to act, and I would’ve had a great opening, had Ren not slammed down the door like a one wolf wrecking ball…Typical.”

Kylo’s voice is frighteningly quiet when he speaks up. “You took her to Snoke?”

Hux swallows heavily. “Ren, it was just an astral projection-”

“Give me one good fucking reason to not rip your throat open and watch you bleed out,” Kylo suggests. When his fists uncurl, Mara can see wicked claws curving from the tips of his fingers. His entire body is tensed, his face dangerously devoid of anything but rage.

Hux wets his lips, taking a breath before trying to answer. “I can help you. You need to know what’s at stake here. I don’t have much time before I have to go back, let me help-”

“Like you helped me back when we were kids?” Kylo snarls.

The redheaded man shakes his head urgently. “You know I wasn’t in a position to do anything back then…”

“You’re never in a position to do anything for anyone, if it means sticking your own neck out,” Kylo hisses. “You’d rather play the good soldier and follow orders. You’re a coward, a fucking guard dog on a leash.”

Hux’s eyes narrow in a glare, but he has enough sense to not retort. When he finally speaks again after a long silence, it’s with a tone of caution. “Perhaps you’re right…Perhaps I’m tired of it,” Hux concedes. “We were both prisoners, Ren. The only difference is, you found your freedom. I’m still seeking mine.”

Kylo only glares back at him, his jaw clenched with anger. Mara takes the moment of silence between them to voice what she’s been wondering. They clearly have a history together, which is something Kylo has suspiciously left out of any of their conversations.

“How do you two know each other?” she asks, looking at Kylo. “You said you weren’t in the First Order.”

“He wasn’t. At least not willingly,” Hux supplies. “He was one of their more unique side projects-”

“Shut your mouth, Hux, or I’ll shut it for you. Permanently,” Kylo threatens. Mara searches his face, confused at what he doesn’t want her to know. But Kylo avoids meeting her eyes.

Hux raises his eyebrows at Mara. “I guess that’s a story for another time,” he quips.

She drops it, unwilling to press further on that particular topic when Kylo seems so upset. She’ll have to get answers from him eventually, but there’s more she needs to know from Hux while she has the chance.

“How did you find me? Was it the necklace?” she asks instead.

He nods. “They tracked the magic in the pendant, yes.”

Mara hesitantly gets closer to Hux, eager to ask the question that’s been eating away at her since the previous night. “Why do you have the same necklace as mine? Where did you get it?”

His blue eyes search hers, something in them reluctant. “Laurin made it for me, when I was a child,” he answers. She perks up at the sound of her mother’s name. “It was only meant to help me learn control, but I have unfortunately become dependent on it.”

Mara’s heartbeat picks up, and she feels something almost like dread dropping heavily into her stomach. How can she both want the answer to a question, and not want it, at the same time?

“My mom…? You knew my mom when you were a kid?” she ventures.

“She was a part of the First Order.”

“And now?” Mara presses. “Where is she now? Is she still part of the Order?”

Hux stares at her for a moment, looking as if he’s debating answering her. She feels lightheaded, dizzy with anxiety by the time he replies. “…I don’t know,” he admits. “I’m sorry. I haven’t seen her since the day she kidnapped you and fled.”

Mara’s expression crumples with confusion. “Kidnapped? She’s my mother, that’s not kidnapping.”

Kylo turns towards them, his face showing sudden understanding. He gives the other man a warning glance. “Hux, wait-”

“Laurin isn’t your mother,” Hux interrupts Kylo, tone regretful. “Your mother was a werewolf in the breeding program. She died giving birth to you.”


	16. Chapter 16

Mara feels like she’s deflating, the air leaving her lungs while the energy drains from her muscles. What he’s said is too impossible to process. She forces a sharp inhale, and tries to steady herself on her feet. She looks away from Hux’s frowning face, eyes drifting out of focus, taking nothing in but blurry shapes. Mara shakes her head stubbornly.

“No…No, that’s not possible,” she says weakly. Mara has memories of her mom, memories from before she was even old enough for preschool. It’s not possible, it can’t be. Her mom loves her. How could she have lied to her, for her whole life? Why would she do that? It makes no sense.

“I’m sorry,” Hux murmurs. “But it is true…You were only a baby when she stole you. The Order has been searching for you ever since, but she must have hidden you well.”

“Fuck,” Kylo breathes, raking his hand through his hair. Mara glances at him, but sees double, her head swimming. She can’t find words. Nothing seems to matter at the moment. Nothing but the shattered illusion of her entire life, every memory with the woman she had known as her only family.

“What do they want with her?” Kylo demands.

“A solution to the Supreme Leader’s mortality,” Hux replies. “No amount of magic alone can keep him alive forever.”

“But why her?” Kylo presses impatiently

Mara manages to focus her gaze on Hux’s face, and his expression is sympathetic. “Werewolves are immune to magic. We may have strength, resilience, supernatural healing… But our kind cannot use magic. At least that was true, until her.”

Kylo’s head whips towards her, understanding filling his eyes. “That was a real spell you did…? I didn’t think it was real…”

He searches her face for an answer, but she can’t provide one. She hadn’t believed in magic, just like she hadn’t believed in werewolves. And now it feels like her whole world has been turned inside out. Even her upbringing, which had seemed perfectly normal, is somehow part of this endless nightmare. Mara’s chest feels tight, like she’s fighting to expand it for each breath.

“The program was finally successful,” Hux says. “But when Laurin stole her, she robbed Snoke of the chance to create his perfect progeny.”

Kylo stiffens. “He wants to breed with her?” he growls.

“The child that would result from their union would have the power and strength of a werewolf, and the magical affinity that Snoke desires. A perfect hybrid,” Hux explains, wincing at the snarl that comes from Kylo’s chest.

Mara manages to shake herself loose from the shock at that, giving him a look of disbelief. “I’m sorry, what? He wants to have a fucking child with me?”

Hux backs up when Kylo only growls again, the sound coming out of him reminding Mara of a feral dog. The redhead holds his hands up. “Don’t claw the messenger, Ren. But yes, that is his intent.”

Mara’s never experienced disgust quite this visceral, but she is acutely sickened by the thought. The memory of the Supreme Leader’s distorted, hideous features, his ancient skin stretched over them, makes her mouth taste acidic. She can’t suppress the shivers of horror at the notion of him touching her, let alone anything else…

“No. Fuck no, that’s not-I don’t-” Mara can’t seem to force a coherent sentence and she abandons the attempt, shaking her head instead. The shaking doesn’t dislodge the memory of Snoke, and she’s stuck repeating their encounter while the horrified feeling only grows.

“A child would give him new life,” Hux says quietly. “But there is a resistance. They believe that you might be powerful enough to help overthrow him, once and for all. I could take you to them-”

“No,” Kylo growls immediately. “She’s not getting involved in that shit.”

“You should let her make her own decisions, Ren,” Hux argues. “You aren’t her alpha…yet.”

Mara can’t stand to hear him anymore. She can’t stand to hear anything anymore, no more bad news, no more life shattering announcements. She is done with it all, and she snaps.

“Get out,” Mara snarls at the redhead. Hux’s mouth falls open with surprise. “Get the fuck out, get away from me,” she hisses.

“You can’t be serious-” he protests.

“You heard her,” Kylo says, stepping closer to Hux threateningly.

“She isn’t thinking clearly, Ren,” he points out. “She doesn’t know what’s best-”

“What’s best for her is to stay alive and free, not get dragged into some First Order power struggle,” Kylo interrupts, his voice dropping with anger. “Get out, or I’ll throw you out.”

“Fine-Fine!” Hux concedes, raising his voice as he heads towards the exit. “I’ve been gone too long anyway, good luck to both of you. Run fast.”

Kylo growls with warning, but Hux ignores him to throw the door of the motel room open. He hesitates there, looking back at her. Mara looks away from the concern in his blue eyes, and the pained expression on Hux’s face. She drops down to sit on the edge of the bed.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, Ren, but… Bite her soon. The full moon is coming,” Hux says quietly. Then he shuts the door, and is gone.

Kylo lets her sit there for a few minutes in silence, and Mara stares at the floor. Could what Hux said be true? Could her whole existence just be part of some disgusting experiment carried out by the First Order? Was her life’s purpose only to be a breeding partner to a decrepit monster?

She doesn’t even know if she believes Hux. He’s proven himself to be a perfectly good liar before, and she has no reason to trust him…She has no reason to trust anyone. Her mother clearly had secrets, things she kept hidden from her. She had to have known about Mara’s true nature, and yet she’d prepared her for nothing. Like some cruel joke being set up for years, only for her mom to disappear before the punchline.

“We should…we should get going,” Kylo suggests hesitantly. “He’s right that we need to move fast. Especially after what he said…”

“I don’t know if I trust what he said….” Mara admits, hating the tremble in her voice.

Kylo’s brow creases with concern, and he comes closer. Mara flinches, feeling the bizarre urge to retreat from him. She’s too shaken, her thoughts irrational, and now she doesn’t even know if she can trust him. He’s hidden things from her too, hasn’t he?

“I think he was telling the truth,” Kylo says softly.

But Mara only shakes her head, asking bitterly, “And I’m supposed to trust your judgment?”

Kylo steps in front of her, kneeling down. She moves her hands when he reaches for one, giving him a rueful look. “You can trust me, Mara,” he reassures. “You know that-”

“No, I don’t know that,” she snaps. Hurt flashes in his eyes, but she ignores it and stands, pushing past him. “I don’t think I can trust you. You knew, didn’t you? You knew all along where I was from and you didn’t tell me-”

“No, I didn’t!” Kylo denies, jumping up to round on her. “I swear to you, I didn’t know. I just put it together when Hux said your mother kidnapped you. It made sense suddenly, why you didn’t have a pack. Why you didn’t know anything about werewolves.”

He reaches for her, but she backs up. She runs right into the corner of the dresser the television sits on, but the pain barely registers in her brain. It’s a distant throbbing in her flesh, unable to override her emotional meltdown.

“I hate this, I hate that I can’t trust anyone,” Mara rants, fighting to keep her voice level. But it’s a losing battle, the tears are stinging at her eyes, threatening to break free.

Kylo doesn’t relent, his eyes pleading with hers. “You can trust me. Everything I’ve done has been for you, to keep you safe.”

Mara gives him an incredulous look, a trembling laugh breaking free from her chest. “You knew Hux! You have a whole history with the First Order and you didn’t tell me! You keep things from me! How can I trust you?”

Kylo’s eyes flash with anger before he struggles against it, trying to keep his composure. “My history with the Order has nothing to do with this…” he says tersely.

“And I’m just supposed to trust you on that, trust you with everything? Because I don’t have anyone else, do I? I’m fucking clueless and helpless and I’m just supposed to trust someone who lies to me-” Her voice has risen to the point of hysterics, but she can’t stop until Kylo’s anger snaps. His eyes flare bright red, his furious growl silencing her immediately.

“What do you want to know?” he snarls, pacing closer. “Do you want to know how long they kept me chained in a cell?”

She’s shaking as she retreats into the wall, pressing herself into it. The tears have escaped, flooding down her face. Mara tries to draw a breath, but Kylo’s anger has worsened her composure. She only feels more hysterical as she stares at him fearfully, unsure how to respond.

“Years,” he snaps. “What else do you want to know? How they tortured me? How Snoke got into my head, into my thoughts? How he tried to break every last piece of me?”

Her eyes widen with shock at his words, but she can’t stop him now. She’s pushed him to the breaking point, and Kylo’s eyes are wild and animalistic as he confesses. He advances on her, like a predator that has its prey cornered without escape. He practically bares his teeth with frustration when he continues.

“Do you want to hear how after all of the pain and brainwashing, there was almost nothing left of me?” Kylo asks venomously. “Nothing but rage and what Snoke wanted. Whatever Snoke wanted.”

“I’m sorry,” she gasps. She isn’t even sure what she’s apologizing for. For what he endured? For pushing him to explain when he clearly wasn’t ready? But her words seem to break through his anger and Kylo falters, his fists loosening at his sides. His jaw clenches, eyes searing into hers as he takes in her quivering lips, her overflowing eyes.

Mara watches his anger transform into something else. Something vulnerable and desperate fills Kylo’s expression, his eyes gradually fading to a human brown. His lower lip trembles, but he presses his mouth into a tight line, fighting against the emotion. Kylo tears his eyes away. When he speaks again, his voice is so low that she can barely hear it.

“Do you want to know why I can’t use the name Ben Solo anymore?” he asks.

Her stomach lurches when his words bring sudden understanding. What Poe had warned her about in the police station clicks into place, and she tries to stop him. She doesn’t want to force him to say it out loud, she’d never meant to make him confess to this. “Kylo, stop-”

“I murdered my father,” he breathes. He turns away, turns his back to her. “I killed him because I was ordered to.”

The admission hangs between them, and Mara feels her heart sinking, sagging down with the knowledge of Kylo’s pain. It makes sense now, why he hadn’t wanted to discuss what the First Order did to him. Why he kept his past such a mystery. She moves towards him, unsure what to say or do but knowing that she needs to reassure him.

When she reaches for his arm, however, Kylo rips it away. He turns on her, his red-rimmed eyes darting to her face before he looks away. “Of course I didn’t want to tell you,” Kylo mutters. “How could I tell you that? I didn’t want you to know what I am.”

Mara steps closer, but he avoids her gaze, his expression lost in pained memory. “I’m not a good man,” Kylo says. “I did awful things for them…”

“But you left them,” Mara says softly.

Kylo shakes his head. “Only when I saw what I’d done. It took seeing my dad dead to snap me out of it.”

She reaches for him again, and he doesn’t resist this time. She moves slowly, cautiously. His eyes are still wild enough to remind her of a trapped animal, desperate and pleading. But when her hand touches his face, they fall closed. Black lashes rest on his pale skin. She trails her fingertips down his cheek, and he swallows, hard.

“I’m sorry,” he murmurs. “I didn’t want you to look at me like I’m a monster…”

“Kylo,” Mara whispers. He presses his face further into her palm, seeking more contact. “Kylo, look at me.”

He opens his eyes, and she searches them. There’s no red to them now, only warm brown. She notices the varying shades in his irises, darker brown and lighter honey rings around each pupil. Mara brings her other hand up, cradling his face, holding his gaze for as long as she can. She can sense the tension leaving him with each heartbeat, the pain easing from his expression.

“You’re not a monster,” she breathes. “You aren’t what they tried to turn you into.”

“You aren’t what Snoke wants to turn you into, either,” Kylo says quietly. She freezes when he reaches out to push the hair from her eyes, his hand falling down to cradle her neck. “I won’t let them take you.”

He hunches down, closer to her, and she takes a deeper breath to catch his scent. It somehow warms her, calming her nerves and replacing all of the panic with a steady focus on Kylo. Only Kylo. Why had she doubted him? She’d been so panicked over what Hux said, she’d lashed out at the only person she’d been able to rely on.

Mara presses closer to him, trailing her fingertips down to his neck. She looks down while she struggles to find the words, to confess what’s become more and more apparent in their time together. There’s no use denying it any longer.

“Everything’s been so chaotic and… crazy, since I met you. I never know which way is up and I feel like I’m losing my mind, but…” Mara pauses to gather her nerve, before daring to say it. “I want you. I want…whatever this is.” 

She glances up to gauge his reaction, but Kylo is already bending down, his lips catching hers. His kiss is needy, messy until she tilts her face upwards for him. But it’s also absolutely perfect, her mind blanking of everything except the taste of Kylo’s lips. Their noses bump as she angles for more of him, stretching up, her arms hanging on around his neck. His tongue finds hers and she makes a soft whimper of content, parting her lips for him, giving whatever he wants to take.

That instinct inside her that’s been struggling to make itself known wakes up. It surges at the taste of Kylo, at his hands on her body, his delicious scent overwhelming her. Finally, her conscious mind is able to put a word to that feeling of recognition. She knows what Kylo is to her, what he was always meant to be for her.

When they finally part, Mara says the words aloud, breathing it into the space between their lips. “My mate.”


	17. Chapter 17

**Afternoon**

Mara only realizes they’re pulling off the freeway when Kylo’s hand leaves hers. She’s been half dozing in the passenger seat, soothed by his hand holding hers and the occasional sound of rain hitting the windshield. She sits up straighter, blinking sleepily as they turn onto a country road. It’s lined with a few stores and diners. There’s also a coffee shop, which she perks up at the sight of.

“Coffee,” Mara croaks, voice dry from sleep.

Kylo glances at her, smiling. “Food first. Your stomach’s been growling loud enough to wake the dead.”

She doesn’t argue that, feeling the hollow pit in her belly. She’s starving, now that she’s conscious enough to notice. They pull into the parking lot of one of the diners, and Mara fumbles to shove her shoes back onto her feet. Kylo rounds the truck, waiting for her to finish with the laces before he helps her down. 

They start across the lot, and Mara smiles when he loops his arm around her shoulders. Kylo pulls her close to his side, ducking down to sneak a kiss to the top of her head. It feels comforting and sweet, the way he tucks her under his arm. She considers stopping so she can snuggle into him further. He’s somehow making messy hair and a plain t-shirt look nearly irresistible, after all. But her stomach is burning with hunger, so she lets him guide her towards the door.

They’re seated at a small booth, and the waitress takes their order immediately. Mara isn’t surprised when Kylo orders enough to feed an army. She orders quite a bit more than she normally would as well. Despite whatever weirdness going on with her body lately, she listens to it. And right now, it’s demanding food.

The waitress has barely disappeared back into the kitchen when Kylo moves. He slinks his leg underneath the table, resting it against hers. Mara bumps her leg gently into his, an acknowledgement of the contact, as she lets her tired eyes slide closed. Something has changed between them since that morning. She’s struggling to pinpoint what. It’s like some last barrier between them is crumbling, falling away.

Perhaps she had been the barrier. Since she abandoned her resistance, Kylo seems to be much more forward with his affection. She peeks from under her lashes when she feels him playing with her hand. His fingers roam lightly up over hers in a lazy exploration. When she looks at his face, his eyes are locked outside the window. He’s focused on the road in the distance and the stormy sky above it.

“What are you thinking?” Mara asks.

His touch pauses, as he looks back at her. “I’m thinking it’s good luck that it’s raining today,” he answers.

She furrows her brows slightly. “Why’s that?”

“Rain makes it harder to track scents,” Kylo explains quietly.

“Oh,” Mara says, before thinking about it. “I guess that makes sense.”

He nods slightly, before his attention tracks back out the window. She gets the feeling that Kylo is on guard, but trying to appear relaxed. She looks down at the table between them, sliding her hand slowly underneath his until it’s hidden by his palm.

Kylo looks down when she skims his thumb with hers, before his eyes trap hers. There’s a sudden intensity to him as he speaks, in a hushed whisper. “I meant it when I said I won’t let them take you,” he says. “I don’t care who I have to kill.”

“Kylo,” she breathes. “It doesn’t have to come to that. We can hide, can’t we?”

Though he moves his head in a barely perceptible nod, his face is set in a severe expression. “I’ll kill them all. Burn the whole Order to the ground,” he admits. “If that’s what it takes.”

A shiver dances up her spine, but it isn’t from fear. Something in Mara reacts with pleasure to his threat, a ruthless vow of protection. She’s starting to think of that something in her as the animal side of her. It only seems fitting, given it’s a feral thing ruled by instinct.

It’s the part of her that recognized Kylo for her mate, and it seems to be growing stronger the longer she’s with him. Right now, it’s more than content to imagine him tearing apart anyone that comes after them. If she lets herself think about it, she can practically taste the blood herself, metallic and sweet on her tongue. She swallows hard, trying to get the phantom taste out of her mouth.

Mara tries to gain some control over herself, rather than feed into her imagination. They should avoid a confrontation as much as possible. The Order likely outnumbers them by a significant factor. Plus, they can use magic. She doesn’t want to guess what all that entails. Running and hiding is the best bet, she thinks. They have to be smart and logical if they want to make it. 

When she looks back up at Kylo, his gaze has grown scrutinizing. He’s staring at her as if he’s puzzled by something in her eyes.

“What?” she asks.

“I thought I saw…Never mind,” Kylo shakes his head.

“Thought you saw what?”

Kylo doesn’t answer, however, his eyes still flickering between hers. The waitress arrives then, sliding their plates onto the table. They both give in to their hunger, and Mara nearly moans when she tastes her food. How long’s it been since she’s properly eaten? It must have been way too long, as her head already feels clearer after the first few bites.

The waitress looks like she’s impressed when she comes back to cleared plates, giving them a grin. “Food was good, I take it?” she asks.

Mara nods. “Yes, thank you,” she replies. “Would I be able to get some pie to go?”

Kylo looks amused across the table, and the waitress gives a chuckle. “Of course, what kind?”

“Do you have apple?” Mara asks hopefully.

The waitress nods with a smile, heading back towards the bar and kitchen. She watches her retreat, her eyes flickering to the televisions above the bar. One of them is just switching to a commercial when she looks, but she freezes at the flash of a face before it vanishes.

It couldn’t be…could it? Her eyes must be playing a trick on her. Mara stares at the screen, willing it to show the face she thought she’d caught a glimpse of. But it persists with its commercial break, advertising everything from local restaurants to basement waterproofing. She swears her mother’s face had been there…

“Mara?” Kylo asks. “What’s wrong?”

“I saw her, but…” she says, tailing off with confusion. A commercial for a used car lot starts playing. It shows a man dressed up in a gorilla suit, loping between sedans and minivans. She stares, feeling disbelief. Could her mother have resurfaced? Is she looking for her?

Kylo’s eyes flicker between her and the television, concern lacing his features. “Who?”

Mara forces herself to look away from the bar, shaking her head slightly. “Can I borrow your phone? I want to look up the news.”

Kylo hesitates for a moment, but takes a deep breath and fishes the device from the pocket of his jeans. He hands it over, and Mara wastes no time typing her own name into the search bar. She filters the results to show news articles, uncomfortable reading headlines about herself. Most of the sources are back in her home state, but one in particular catches her eye. It’s from a national news station, and it has what she’s looking for.

She clicks the title: _Missing Woman’s Mother Pleads: Come Home._ There’s a video on the website, and she plays it, turning up the volume on Kylo’s phone. Mara doesn’t acknowledge when the waitress brings the pie, tuning out Kylo thanking her and requesting the check.

She ignores the information on her case, cringing at the pictures they included of her. It’s more of the same stuff she’s already read. She’s been missing for so long, believed to have been abducted from the police station, onward and so forth. She considers skipping forward.

But then her mom appears, less than a minute into the video. She’s being interviewed by a reporter. Mara feels her jaw drop with shock. Laurin looks so different than she remembers. Kylo comes around the table, leaning over her to watch the phone screen. She barely registers his hand on her shoulder, eyes prickling with tears of anger.

Years of no contact, of no word from the woman who raised her. Not even a note to say she’s alive. Years of lies and omissions, their entire relationship a fraud. Yet somehow Laurin has the nerve to do this, now. To put on a show of concern for the world to see. Her mother looks devastated, begging the camera.

“Mara, please, if you’re seeing this... Just come home. Or I’ll come to you. Just let me know where you are, that you’re safe,” her mom pleads. “Please call me. I just need to know you’re alright.”

The number flashes multiple times on screen before the video concludes, but Mara doesn’t recognize it. She hands the phone over to Kylo when the video starts replaying, staring down at the table. Her eyes fixate on the salt shaker, studying it without seeing. Kylo hovers beside her.

“Mara,” he says cautiously. “You can’t go home.”

“I know…”

She stands abruptly, grabbing the paper bag the pie is packed into. Kylo rushes to throw money onto the table and follow her, saying nothing as they approach his truck. Her hands shake as she struggles to put on her seatbelt, but Kylo seems to know to leave her alone. She gets it clicked into place and tries to look out the window, jaw clenched.

It’s silent as they drive away, except the windshield wipers occasionally flickering in the drizzle. She’s fuming, somehow blaming everything that’s happened on her mother. Her mother that’s not actually her mother. The woman who’d kidnapped her and lied to her and-

Mara squeezes her hands into fists, her nails biting into her palms. She can’t keep thinking about it, she feels like she’s going to lose it.

Several minutes go by before Kylo ventures to say something. “I know you must be upset,” he says quietly.

“I’m not upset, I’m furious,” she snaps. “How can she act so worried for me, like she doesn’t know what situation she put me in? She knew what I was born as, and she kept it from me! She set me up for this bullshit with werewolves and fucking Snoke, and she just took off…Left me to deal with it, alone…”

She shakes her head, angry with the tears that keep trying to fill her eyes. “She knows that I’m running for my fucking life, because she set me up to have to run! That necklace, the one the Order tracked? Why would she give me a fucking necklace for them to trace me with?”

She stops when her voice starts wavering, roughly rubbing the tears off her face. Just once, Mara would like a day without an emotional rollercoaster. It doesn’t help that everything feels even more amplified today. The rage is boiling inside her veins, adrenaline mounting with the urge to lash out. And yet she’s stuck sitting in a truck, without an outlet.

More tears overflow and she tries to rub them away, too. She fishes the apple pie out of the bag, placated that the waitress had packed plastic silverware in with it. Kylo says nothing, keeping his gaze on the road even as she savagely stabs her fork down into the crust. She’s never eaten pie so furiously before.

A long time passes, the pie container empty but for a few crumbs, before Kylo attempts to talk again. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I know this has to be really rough.”

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for,” Mara mumbles. “You aren’t the one who made my whole life a lie…”

She turns to stare out the window again, the anger abating. The rage drags its claws out of her, slowly releasing her from its hold. The hurt still lingers, but she feels a little better now.

“Should we stop somewhere and get you more pie?” Kylo offers. His voice borders on humorous, like he’s trying to lighten the mood.

Mara sets her jaw, reluctant to let the small smile tug at her lips. “No,” she says. Then she thinks about it and adds, “Not yet, anyway.”

Kylo smiles in a small victory. “How long has that been happening?”

Mara frowns. “How long has what been happening?”

“The intense anger,” he clarifies. When she gives him a confused look, he adds, “I could feel it come over you.”

She licks her lips, suddenly nervous. Was there something unusual about her being that angry? Then again, now that she thinks about it… She’d never felt violent when angry before. Her anger was always closer to frustration than aggression, until recently. Mara looks away, acknowledging this visceral rage has happened at least once before.

“I think it first happened with Hux,” she admits. “In that cabin he was keeping me in…I tried to stab him with a pair of scissors.”

Kylo barks out a surprised laugh. “That’s my girl.”

Mara ignores the swell of pleasure she feels at the pride in his voice. “When someone admits they tried to stab someone, I don’t think you’re supposed to say ‘That’s my girl’,” she points out.

“You are if it’s Hux that’s getting stabbed,” Kylo retorts, giving her a sly smirk.

Mara shrugs. “I don’t like him either,” she concedes. “But, I also don’t like flying into random rages.”

“Understandable.”

“Is this a werewolf thing?” she guesses.

“Probably,” Kylo answers. “Though most of us go through it when we’re teens, around our first change.”

“Why is it happening to me now? You haven’t…You know, bitten me,” Mara asks, confused.

“The bite’s what triggers the first change, and creates the bond between an alpha and beta,” Kylo tries to explain. “You won’t change without it, but that doesn’t mean the werewolf side of you doesn’t exist. The wolf is in you, and it seems like she’s acting up lately.”

“So…will it get better after the bite?” she presses, voice hopeful.

Kylo makes a face. “Uh…No. It’ll get worse, for a while.”

Mara stares at him, but he keeps his eyes on the road to avoid her exasperation. “Seriously? Did it get worse for you, after being bitten?”

“I was never bitten.”

She’s confused. “Why not?”

“I was born an alpha,” Kylo answers. “Only betas are born latent. It’s part of pack dynamics. When alphas turn betas, the resulting bonds keep the pack together.”

“…Fantastic,” Mara sighs. None of this reassures her about getting bitten, the outlook for her future now bordering on disastrous. “So, if you turn me, and the angry wolf in me takes over…What’s to stop me from going on a rampage in the woods, and mauling innocent campers and squirrels and shit?”

Kylo shrugs, as if unconcerned. “Me.”

**Later**

She’s spent too long arguing with herself in her own head, but Mara thinks she knows what she wants to do about her mother. She can’t just ignore the news video, or move on like she isn’t feeling betrayed. Her whole life, the woman she’d thought had brought her into this world had been there for her. Surely those memories couldn’t be all fake? Laurin had to love her, she’d felt as much her entire childhood. There has to be an explanation. And she’ll never get it, if she doesn’t talk to her mom.

Mara waits until they pull into a gas station to refill before voicing her thoughts to Kylo. While they wait for the tank to fill up, she joins him outside the truck to stretch her limbs.

“I think I want to call her,” she says. Kylo’s eyes darken immediately. “I know I can’t trust her. But I just need to ask her why...Why she did any of this. If I can get answers from her, I want them.”

“And what if she refuses answers?” Kylo presses. “What if she tries to make you meet with her?”

Mara shakes her head with frustration. “I don’t know.”

“You can’t go to her, Mara,” he growls. “She could be working for the Order again. This could all be a trap.”

“I know that…” she sighs.

“Then why even bother calling?” Kylo argues.

“Because she raised me!” Mara says. “She… She made me chocolate chip pancakes, every Sunday. She taught me the names of all the kinds of butterflies, and the frogs by the stream… She hugged me every day before school, and she would sing me to sleep when I was sick.”

She stops to take a breath, trying to keep her composure. She catches Kylo’s eyes, looking at him pleadingly. “I don’t know how…how to make sense of all that, while thinking it was fake,” she stammers. “It felt real, and now… How can I be okay with anything moving forward, when nothing in my past makes any sense? I need to understand.”

The intensity fades from Kylo’s eyes, replaced with sympathy. “If you have to call her, Mara…Then call her,” he says. “But you have to know…Sometimes you don’t get closure. Sometimes you never get to understand…And all you can do, is let the past die.”

He holds his phone out, and she hesitates before taking it. It’s easy enough to find the video again, and she memorizes the phone number. By the time she’s punched it in, Kylo’s retreated to the other side of the truck. It feels like he’s trying to give her privacy. Though she appreciates it, she almost wishes he’d stayed by her side. Her hand shakes when she holds it up to her ear.

The call only rings once before it’s answered. “Hello!?”

She swallows painfully at her mom’s voice, her mouth suddenly dry. “It’s me,” she forces out.

“Mara,” Laurin breathes. “It’s so good to hear your voice. I was worried.”

Mara huffs with disbelief. “Why would you be worried?” she asks, sarcastic. “You just kidnapped me from a cult and forgot to tell me I’m a fucking werewolf.”

“I’m so sorry, I know this has to be hard-”

“Why?” she interrupts harshly. “Why did you lie to me?”

“I can explain everything,” Laurin assures quickly. “Where are you? I can come to you.”

“No,” Mara says, shaking her head. Her chest throbs, like someone’s twisting a knife into her sternum.

“Are you-Have you turned yet?” her mom asks urgently.

Mara blinks back tears of hurt and confusion. “No…”

“What-Why not?” The other woman’s voice grows alarmed. “Hasn’t an alpha found you!?”

“Yes,” she admits. Her eyes flicker over the truck bed to the back of Kylo’s head, taking in the black waves of his hair. “I’m with one right now…”

“Why hasn’t he bitten you?” her mom persists, sounding distressed. “That spell was so powerful, he shouldn’t be able to resist. I don’t understand.”

There’s silence on the phone call while that sinks in, before Mara breathes, “The spell is why they came after me.” It isn’t so much a question. It’s more a sudden confirmation of what she’d suspected, but not wanted to believe.

“It-the ceremony, it called for a mate,” Laurin rushes to explain. “I needed to make sure you were bitten, before Snoke could get to you-Mara, this is important. Why haven’t you taken the bite?”

She can’t answer immediately. She’s never felt anything like the sensation that rushes over her now. It feels like her blood has chilled, turned to liquid ice that courses through her. She shivers, despite the warm, muggy air. Her mother was the reason those wolves had all been coming for her. The memory of that hideous gray wolf, standing in her kitchen, ready to rip her apart… it flashes in her mind. She knows, with horrifying clarity, that her mother had made that happen. She’d made her promise to do a spell that could have gotten her killed.

“Mara? Are you still there? I know this is all confusing, but you have to let him-”

“I could have died,” she whispers, voice quavering. “I was terrified, I thought I was going crazy…”

“I…Maybe I should have told- Mara, I’m sorry,” her mom confesses. “I know this seems bad, but I did it for you-”

“For me!?” Mara shouts into the phone. “You wanted me to get attacked and mauled!? You had me do some spell to-to what? To drive them all crazy wanting to turn me? You did that for me!? Are you fucking serious?”

“You don’t understand, Snoke, the First Order, they’ll come for you,” Laurin rushes to say. “It had to be this way! But I can help you, just tell me where you are. I’ll come there.”

Mara feels the anger, bubbling beneath the surface. Fighting to claw its way up. She tries to swallow against it, but only ends up feeling nauseous by suppressing it. “I don’t need your help. I don’t need anything from you, ever again.”

Her mother sounds panicked at that, frantically trying to explain. “You don’t understand, Mara. On the next full moon, the protection wears off! You’ve undone the spell hiding your powers, your magic. When you used magic to call a mate, you cast it off.”

She shakes her head, not wanting to hear anything else. “I don’t care.”

“The Order can track magic,” her mom hisses desperately. “They’ll be able to find you after the full moon. But if you come to me, I can recast the protection! I can keep you hidden from them, Mara, but you have to trust me. You need me.”

The rage wins. It takes over her, and unable to physically strike out, she does the next best thing. Mara hurls the phone at the pavement, as hard as she can. When the shattered screen gives a halfhearted flicker, she stomps on it, repeatedly.

She’s left shaking, staring at the broken thing on the ground. The worst part about the sudden anger is how quickly it leaves her, to also feel broken and shattered. She gives in to grief, letting a strangled sob leave her chest.

Mara flinches at the touch on her arm, before realizing it’s Kylo. He’s hovering uncertainly beside her, his face somber. She looks from him to the phone, before swearing.

“I’m sorry about your phone,” she apologizes, guilt filling her.

“It’s fine. I go through a lot of phones,” he says dismissively. This time when he touches her arm, she doesn’t pull away. She just searches his expression miserably, wondering where to start with explaining what just happened.

“My mom-Laurin, she just said-”

“I heard,” Kylo interrupts gently.

“You heard everything?” she asks. He nods, and she sighs with relief that she doesn’t have to say anything more. Mara pushes herself into his arms, hiding her face against his chest. She focuses on Kylo’s even heartbeat, his body supporting her as she crumples against him. At the moment, he’s the only thing keeping her steady.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Smut ahead

**Days Later, Evening**

Two days go by, with the full moon creeping closer each night. She is more aware of it than she’s ever been before. Mara spends each day dreading nightfall, and the glowing orb that will hover in the dark sky like an omen. Will the First Order be able to track her when it reaches its fullest state? Or had her mother just been lying, like she’d lied about so much else?

Kylo swears he’s taking her someplace she’ll be safe. They’re heading into the mountains, the scenery outside her window mostly unfamiliar. The forests are predominantly pine now, though the small towns they pass through still remind her of home. At least until they turn a corner, and mountains rise up beyond the buildings. Then she’s reminded of just how far she is from the place she’d grown up.

Mara finds it harder and harder to stay in control during the day. Her anger flares sharply at the littlest of irritations, often triggered by senses that are too acute. It’s a recent development, this sudden amplification of the world around her. She finds herself clamping her eyes shut while Kylo drives, trying to block out colors that seem more vivid than she’s ever noticed before.

Sounds, too, are much more piercing now. She’d noticed it at the motel they’d stayed at last. Mara had heard a rushing and thumping sound, issuing from the woman working the front desk. It had taken her a confused moment to realize it was the woman’s heartbeat, and the sound of blood rushing in her veins. Somehow it was distorted, louder even than her voice as she’d spoken with Kylo. It’s like her brain had fixated on the sound of a pumping heart, to the point where she could barely tear her attention away. 

The scents are even worse. The last restaurant they’d eaten at had been too crowded. Mara had barely been able to eat, despite being perpetually hungry. The people around them just had so many smells, mixing together into a cloyingly sweet stench. So many different perfumes, colognes, lotions…All the different scents clashed, making her head feel dizzy.

Kylo swears what’s happening to her is normal, and that it will get better. Still, she hates it. As another day draws to a close, she seeks relief from the harsh light of the sunset. Kylo had draped her in one of his jackets that chilly morning, and she helps herself to it now.

Mara burrows beneath the coat while he drives them west. She snuggles her face into the soft sherpa lining the inside, using it both as a blanket and to hide her eyes from the light. It helps her ignore everything else, replacing the overwhelming sensory input with just one thing: Kylo. His scent clings all over the coat, and she breaths it in greedily. It lets her mind slow down, and Mara can relax in the car seat.

Of course, that only presents another problem. Her attraction to Kylo has also been getting harder to control. She’s noticed it the most recently, her body reminding her most of her waking hours. She wraps her arms around herself beneath the coat, half to stop herself for reaching towards the driver’s seat. They need to keep moving, to get to wherever he’s taking her. She can’t distract him from their goal.

And yet, his scent is an open invitation to that animal lurking inside her. The one that wants to mark him as her mate. The previous night, she’d had vivid dreams. She woke up clinging onto him, her body carried away in her sleep. Kylo didn’t complain, but she can tell it’s affecting him too. The last two mornings, he’d opened his eyes to reveal bright red irises, his arms locking her body tightly against his.

He touches her nearly constantly since she admitted their connection aloud. It makes it even worse, fueling desire that threatens to take over if she’d let it. But she doesn’t tell him to stop, enjoying it too much. Mara loves the way he always has his hands on her, stealing kisses throughout the day.

Even now, she feels his hand caress her knee. She fights the strong urge to let her legs spread wider, to encourage his touch to travel up her thigh. It’s useless, as her body reacts all the same. His fingers trailing over her, even with the thin layer of her clothes serving as a barrier, is enough. She can’t help but imagine more, with his scent making her mind buzz and his touch reminding her of her sleepy fantasies.

When Kylo’s hand slides up just a few inches, she lets her legs part a little. He strokes her thigh lazily, fingertips teasing higher before trailing back down. Again and again, as if he’s just absentmindedly touching her while he drives. But her body knows differently, her skin hyper sensitive to him. It’s been like this since she’d given in to the pull, like some force compelling her to consummate their relationship.

Her panties are already damp, her body quick to arousal after being denied so long. On one especially bold stroke, his fingers just graze the apex of her thighs. Mara’s breath catches when Kylo seems to notice her state, his grip squeezing her thigh suddenly.

Then his hand leaves her. Mara dares to peek up from his coat, to see Kylo’s expression. It’s unreadable, darkened as he stares at the road ahead. But his eyes are once more burning red, his knuckles tight with tension on the steering wheel.

She considers apologizing. She’s driving herself crazy, she can’t imagine what it’s like for him. But the volatile look to his eyes stills her tongue, and she hesitates. What is he feeling right now? Is he as frustrated as she is?

Kylo pulls into the first parking lot they come across, not putting the truck into park until they’ve reached the farthest corner from the rest area and gas station. There’s only one other car in the lot. They are otherwise surrounded by the edge of the woods and vacant pavement. The pine trees are cast in shadow as the sun disappears, the inside of the truck dark with the approach of twilight.

“I’m sorry,” Kylo says quietly, dropping his hands from the wheel.

Mara’s heart races when his gaze, violent red, catches hers. He’s nearly terrifying looking, between those otherworldly eyes and his severe expression. Yet, she only feels attraction when she detects desire in him. She finds him beautiful, with the raw hunger on his face for her. No one’s ever looked at her with such feral desperation, and she’s never felt so eager to be consumed. Excitement shivers up her spine.

Mara watches his control shatter, each thread of restraint snapping loose. She witnesses the lust battle and win over reason. He licks his lips, crimson eyes dropping to her mouth, then roving over her body.

“I can’t help it,” Kylo admits, shifting towards her suddenly. He slams the center console up, out of the way. “I need-“

Mara doesn’t let him finish his thought, moving closer to meet him. She reaches for him, cradling his face to pull him closer. She needs it too, her thoughts too single-minded to resist. Never has she felt an instinct so strong, so overpowering. She needs satiation, so she seeks his lips.

Kylo tastes as good as he smells, and she parts for his tongue eagerly. He presses her back, into her seat, taking over the kiss hungrily. She forgets to breathe for a moment, too possessed by the aggressive way he domineers her mouth. When Mara finally drags her lips from his to catch a breath, he drops down to her neck. Kylo takes in her scent with a muffled moan, pressing his face in under her jaw.

Her eyes wince shut when he bites, clamping his teeth onto her without reserve. It’s not enough to break through the skin, but it should hurt. In fact, she’s nearly positive it does hurt. But her muddled mind is interpreting even that as pleasure, fueling her arousal. Mara sinks her hand into his dark hair, pressing him further into her neck.

Kylo kisses softly before closing his mouth on her again, sucking and biting at her recklessly. She shivers when his canines graze her skin, gasps when he bites hard. Mara feels the shudder of pleasure travel through Kylo’s body, triggered by being able to get his teeth on her.

But it’s not enough. They both know it. His teeth aren't breaking the skin, and he isn’t inside her… Mara takes a shaky breath, wrapping her free hand around him to try to get him even closer. But he pulls away from her neck suddenly, forcing himself to stop. She wants to protest, but realizes he’s probably toeing the line of what he can handle without losing control.

“You taste good,” Kylo breathes, finding her mouth again. She whimpers into his lips, around his tongue. She gasps for air when he lets her, though he lingers close to her mouth. He sounds half drunk as he admits, “I want more…”

The seat that had always felt spacious is suddenly jammed full with both of their bodies intertwined, but he pulls back enough to find the top of her pants. Mara jerks with surprise, lifting her hips to try to cooperate when he starts pulling them off. But there’s one last, persistent bit of rational thought in her mind.

“People-are there any-?” she mumbles incoherently.

Kylo looks out the windows quickly. “No one’s around,” he insists. He catches her mouth with a hungry kiss, mumbling in fragments. “Can I…I need to-” he takes another taste of her before parting. “I need to touch you…”

She lets him tug her pants down, trying to find a way to spread her legs around him while keeping him close. Kylo doesn’t waste any time, however. He reaches between her thighs immediately, burying his face in her hair to groan quietly when he feels her. He’s breathing deeply, like he’s letting himself get high from her scent.

His touch slides down, down over the slick lips of her pussy, before he parts them with one fingertip. Mara holds her breath at that first contact, her entire mind fixated on his single finger. Kylo rubs slowly around her entrance, exploring how aroused she is, before trailing up to find her clit. Her hips jerk when he touches there, a needy noise escaping her chest.

“So, so ready,” he mumbles, sounding lost in his own arousal. “Ready for me.”

Kylo presses closer to her, and her mind swirls with his scent, delirious and content. She’s caught between his thick body and the seat, forcing her legs wider. Her right knee presses into the door, her left into Kylo’s thigh. He continues playing with her, hiding his face against her neck. Kylo bites down on her pulse point when he rubs her clit, and Mara cries out at pain that intermingles with the pleasure.

She imagines his sharp teeth piercing her skin, her blood coloring the taste of his mouth when they kiss again, and nearly comes from the thought. But Kylo darts his fingers back down, leaving her clit to trace her entrance once more. He releases her flesh from his teeth, kissing over the spot.

“I can’t wait to bury my cock inside you,” he rasps.

Her pussy clenches on nothing at the suggestion, waves of pleasure radiating through her core. “Yes,” she agrees. “Please…Kylo, pl…please.” She makes a halfhearted attempt to find the button, the zipper to his jeans. But she struggles, and can’t seem to make sense of anything but his touch. It’s dulling her thoughts, holding her prisoner for more.

Kylo catches her lips and forces her to give him another kiss. She tries to focus, to kiss him back, but she’s adrift in pleasure. He doesn’t care, darting to kiss her cheek sweetly instead. But when he pulls away to growl, his tone is nearly threatening. “I told you, you’d beg for it.”

His finger slides inside her, and she cries out. It feels like her body’s been waiting, taut with anticipation, for entirely too long. Now, finally, she can give in. Quiet little nonsense noises leave her until she abandons her attempts to say something. Kylo rewards her noises with a second finger, and she digs her nails into his shoulder when he suddenly crooks them, rocking up into her G-spot.

Mara’s head thuds back against the headrest, her mouth falling open. The pressure builds in her core, pleasure surging rapidly. She lets a desperate sob leave her, and Kylo groans with satisfaction, nipping love bites at her throat.

“You like that?” he asks.

“Mm-y-yes,” she forces out weakly, breathing erratically.

“I’ll find all the ways you like being touched,” he promises softly. “All the ways I can take you.”

Yet again, her pleasure spikes sharply and orgasm threatens. But Kylo pulls his fingers from her, returning to her clit. She can only dig her nails into his shirt, her fingers holding the material in a twisting grip when he returns to rubbing patterns over her most sensitive part.

She’s close, so, so close. Kylo seems to know it, tilting her jaw down with his free hand to press a soft, gentle kiss to her mouth. She doesn’t bother trying to kiss him back, only whimpering against his lips, desperate for relief.

“Are you going to come for me?” he asks. “You want to come for your alpha?”

Mara whines, words evading her. His touch moves so perfectly, building ecstasy, his pace speeding up. Mara’s hand falls, clawing at his sleeve. She’s right there, right at the edge. Her mind supplies the reminder of how his teeth feel at her throat, how his red eyes burn into her, captivating.

Kylo hovers close to her ear. When he speaks again, it’s an order. _“Come for me.”_

His deep voice vibrates through her, reaching that instinct inside her that wants to obey. She falls over the edge, the ecstasy peaking violently. She holds her breath, she can’t breathe. Waves of pleasure release through her, one after another. He keeps touching her, dragging it out as she spasms and moans against him. Only when she falls still does he stop.

Mara tries to catch her breath, her ears ringing loudly. A tear must’ve escaped from her lashes, trailing down her cheek. She opens her eyes when she feels Kylo kiss it, licking the taste from his lips. His eyes are still brilliant red, the intensity not abating from him.

She only hesitates a moment before reaching for him. There’s more, so much more that they both need. Kylo stops her, however, catching her hands gently. He shakes his head once.

“No more,” he insists. But his own heavy breathing betrays him. She knows he wants more, just as badly as she does.

Mara practically glares at him, trying to pull her wrists free from his grasp. It’s a useless endeavor, as he holds tight. “You’re kidding me…” she complains, laughing slightly. “You do that and then want to stop?”

Kylo leans forward, his lips finding hers with a reassuring kiss. It’s tender enough to calm her down, her heartbeat slowing as the rush of hormones lets up. When he pulls away, he’s managed to get himself under control. His eyes are human again, and he smiles ruefully.

“If we keep going, I’m going to end up turning you,” Kylo points out. “You said you wanted it to be somewhere safe, and…right now, we’re in a rest stop parking lot.”

She tears her eyes away from his, her mind finally clearing enough to remember where they are. The parking lot is still vacant, with the same, lone car parked in the distance. She swallows awkwardly, suddenly feeling a bit indecent.

“Right… I should probably put my pants back on, then,” she mumbles. Kylo laughs, before trying to stop himself.

“Yeah, sorry about that,” he apologizes, attempting to help her. But they both end up laughing again when she nearly knees him in the face, fighting to get her foot through one of the leg holes. The laughing dissolves into more kissing, her pants only making it halfway up her thighs before they both forget about them again.

Kylo’s kissing turns hungry quickly, his hand coming to hold her throat. The heat returns in a flash, and she has to pull away to protest.

“You said that’s all for now,” she reminds between heavy gasps for air.

Kylo groans, letting himself slump forward against her. “Mmhmm,” he agrees. “I fucking did.”

It’s her turn to suppress laughter now, hearing the irritation in his tone. He lets his face drop from her shoulder to her chest, pressing into her cleavage with a miserable sigh. Mara’s pinned in the corner of the seat beneath him, so she contents herself with rubbing his shoulders slowly.

“How much farther to this place you mentioned?” she asks curiously.

“A few more hours, tops,” Kylo answers, his voice muffled by her shirt.

“Then let’s just drive through the night,” she suggests.

Kylo makes a noise of agreement, nodding his head enthusiastically into her chest. The sooner they get to a safe place to hide, the sooner she can stop feeling like prey running from too many predators. However, it also means letting him claim her. As much as she’d been turned on by that just minutes before, now the rational part of her hesitates.

A bit of fear creeps in at what she’s gotten herself into. There’s still doubt in her mind, fear for what could go wrong. But everything happening to her body is too much to be a coincidence. Something’s already in the process of changing, from how quickly she’d healed to how intense her senses have grown. It feels inevitable now, that she will let him bite her. But what will happen then? Mara knows nothing about that life, about her own nature.

Kylo seems to notice the moment she stiffens with trepidation. He sits up, examining her face. “It’ll be okay,” he says. “You know I’ll take care of you, right?”

She nods, trying to give him a reassuring smile. “I know. It’s still just… a lot.”

He leans forward to bump his forehead into hers gently, holding her gaze. “Let’s just focus on getting there for now. Okay?”

She searches his eyes, loving the shade they are when he’s fully human. They’re so soft and warm, conveying a gentleness that disappears when the werewolf part of him takes over.

“Okay,” she agrees, before trying to lighten the mood. “But let’s start with getting my pants back on my ass.”

Kylo laughs, reaching down to help her tug them up. “I’m really bad at putting clothes back on you.”

“I noticed,” she remarks.

“I think I’m pretty good at getting them off you, though,” he says slyly, giving her a flirtatious smirk.

Mara rolls her eyes, avoiding getting into banter with him. “I’m going to the restroom, and then let’s get back on the road. No more taking clothes off for now,” she says teasingly.

Kylo rolls his eyes. “Yes, dear.”

“Can we get some more pretzels, too?” she asks when she’s fully clothed again. She cranes her head to look back at the rest stop building out the window. It looks like it has an area with snacks or vending machines, promising for her sudden pretzel craving.

“Of course, dear,” Kylo replies, deadpan. She gives him an exaggerated eyeroll, stealing his jacket to put on. It’s cool at night, especially now in the higher elevation. Mara pushes open her car door, taking a moment to stretch outside.

The moon is visible overhead, waxing and dulled by a black mist that swarms over its surface. Low hanging clouds try to block the moonlight, the air muggy as night sets in. Mara rolls her shoulders, hearing a chorus of cracks that suggest she’s been cooped up in a vehicle entirely too long.

There’s a fog hanging low, visible out by the road and in low spots near the woods. The heat of the day seems to be mixing strangely with the chill from the mountains. The fog is thick enough in some spots to obscure shrubs and trees, pooling like strange puddles in the air.

They cross the dark parking lot, passed dozens of empty spots and a fenced in area for people traveling with pets. Everything looks deserted, but the rest stop is brightly lit ahead. They are about halfway there when Kylo stops, tilting his nose upwards into the air as if he smells something strange.

His hand tightens on hers, and Mara looks around in confusion. She sees nothing, and her nose only detects the strong scent of gasoline. The gas station is on the other side of the rest stop, explaining that smell. But Kylo looks taken aback, his brow furrowing.

“What is it?” she asks uncertainly.

He shakes his head. “I thought I caught a weird scent. Probably just cleaning stuff.”

They enter the nearly empty rest stop, a lone teenage boy at the cash register. He’s slumped over, reading what looks like a comic book. He looks up from the counter when they enter.

“Hey,” he greets, sounding unenthusiastic.

Kylo gives him a nod in greeting, steering Mara back through the stands of snacks, souvenirs, and maps. There’s a bank of water fountains, and the entrances to the bathrooms. She heads into the women’s room, the lights clicking on when her motion activates them.

It’s a big restroom, double-sided, with a wall down the middle. She picks a side at random, hurrying into one of the stalls. There is some sort of bleach smell in here, as if someone had cleaned the whole place recently. Maybe that’s what Kylo had picked up on from the parking lot.

She exits the stall to wash her hands, taking a moment to splash some water up onto her face. She’s just patting her cheeks dry with paper towels when the lights cut off overhead. The bathroom is plunged into total darkness.


	19. Chapter 19

Mara blinks against the sudden black that fills her vision, dropping the paper towels onto the counter. She focuses on her hearing, but it’s silent except for the occasional drip from the faucet. She has the urge to call for Kylo, but her intuition holds her back from shouting. She has a bad feeling, and moves as quietly as possible. She holds her hands out to feel along the counter, making her way towards where she knows the door is.

Her eyes try to adjust to the dark, but still aren’t much help. The chemical smell seems to be growing stronger. It’s unpleasant enough that her head starts to feel funny, like a headache coming on.

Mara freezes when the door swings open before she can reach it. There’s red, flashing lights beyond, some sort of emergency backup lighting. The dark shape in the doorway is tall and broad, but she can’t make out his face immediately.

“Mara?”

She relaxes when she hears Kylo, rushing the rest of the way to him. “What’s happening?” she asks, keeping her voice low.

“Nothing good,” he answers. “We need to get out of here.”

The tension in his voice is obvious, and she feels her heart pick up its pace. Kylo takes her hand, urging her out of the bathroom and through the rest stop. The red lights just keep flashing overhead as he guides her around the corner and through aisles of merchandise. At the counter, the teenage boy is on his phone.

“Can’t you call?” he complains, sounding annoyed. “I don’t even know the number… I know I can google it, but why is this my problem?”

Kylo hesitates when they get closer to the doors, pulling her close to his side. He’s looking out of the glass, his gaze roving the outside. She tries to make out his expression, but it’s too dark to see anything but his eyes. They’re red, glowing brighter than the emergency lights overhead. His grip tightens on hers.

The boy seems oblivious to them, continuing his conversation. “Can’t I just lock up and go home? How do you want me to run a credit card with no computer?”

“Stay close,” Kylo reminds, starting them forward. They push through the doors, walking fast along the sidewalk. They round the side of the building, the parking lot stretching out in front of them. It’s an empty expanse except for the truck in the distance. The fog hovers over the ground in pockets, the only light from the nearly full moon overhead.

They start for the black truck, but Kylo jerks her to a stop almost immediately. Her eyes dance over the dark trees, the vacant parking spots. She sees nothing, but Kylo pushes her behind him as if he has spotted something. The chemical smell hits her in another wave, making her stomach flip with nausea. Mara tries to choke down the gag, but the sound escapes her throat anyway.

“Scent blockers,” Kylo whispers.

Her hands curl into fists with sudden understanding. “Hux?” she guesses, looking up at him.

Kylo shakes his head, however. “It’s a pack.”

Mara’s breath catches with fear. A pack of werewolves? She has the sudden urge to flee to the truck, and to yank him along with her. Why are they waiting? As if he’s heard her thoughts, Kylo’s hand grips her arm tightly, holding her back.

She scans the parking lot once more, her eyes lingering on the trees. But then something moves, catching her attention. Something behind the black truck.

Kylo growls, a deep rumble that feels like it vibrates her stomach. It grows louder, and angrier. Goosebumps rise on her arms, the hair on her scalp feeling like it’s standing up at the root. Mara watches, dread growing, as shapes emerge from where they were hiding.

Two men circle the truck, stalking towards them. Two others appear along the line of trees, materializing from thick fog to cross the pavement.

Kylo is frozen as the group of four approaches, his posture tense. Mara fights the instinct to run, her terror only growing as she can suddenly see the strangers’ eyes light up. One leads the group, his eyes a burning red like Kylo’s. The other three have eyes that glow yellowish orange, like flames.

The one in the lead calls out to them, coming to a stop a dozen feet away. “Hand her over, and you can walk away.”

She grits her teeth as anger flares, sharp and violent. It’s another wave of rage, triggered by how he demands her like some object to be traded. Fortunately, there’s enough fear to keep the irrational temper in check. But Mara doesn’t know how long she’ll be able to handle it. It’s getting harder and harder to control the anger when it comes.

Kylo drops her arm, and his hands flex. Wicked claws grow from the ends of his fingertips. “Leave now, and you can live.”

The leader scoffs, looking determined. He’s older, tall and slender. Mara’s eyes flicker passed him when his pack moves. The other men are younger, spreading themselves out around their alpha. Two of them hang back slightly, but the third looks eager. His teeth are bared like a feral animal, his amber eyes jumping between Mara’s gaze and Kylo, blocking their way. And he moves slowly, continually. Edging his way closer.

“Bold for you to say,” the other alpha remarks. “You’re outnumbered.”

A derisive sound leaves Kylo’s chest. “Did you tell them who I am?”

“I know who you are,” the older man remarks. But the two younger wolves of his pack that hung back look uncertain, exchanging nervous looks.

“Then you know you should have brought more,” Kylo snarls.

The strange alpha’s temper snaps, his face twisting into an expression of contempt. “Ben Solo. A traitor to your kind. A disgrace,” he snaps furiously. “And you think you deserve the last female on the continent?”

The two nervous men seem to recognize the name immediately, their body language revealing that they are afraid. They step back even more, their eyes dimming to the weakest hint of yellow. But the third beta werewolf hasn’t given up. He’s edged his way to the side of Kylo, and he takes advantage of the moment of tension between the alpha werewolves.

He darts quickly, trying to catch Kylo by surprise. He rushes from the side towards them, thinking he’s got the jump. His alpha moves to stop him, a sound issuing from his throat like a halfhearted warning. But it’s too late to halt the foolish attempt.

Kylo catches the younger werewolf by the throat, lifting him clear off the ground. Mara can smell the blood before she sees it, a hot, metallic scent coloring the air. But then it colors her vision, streaming down Kylo’s wrist from where his claws dig into the other wolf’s neck. Her eyesight sharpens, tuning in to the crimson with sudden, enhanced vision.

The beta’s amber eyes are panicked, wide with terror. He claws at Kylo’s arm, ripping his shirt sleeve into tatters, slicing into his skin repeatedly. Kylo doesn’t even seem to feel it, his furious gaze focused on the opposing alpha.

“Call them off, and leave,” Kylo demands. “This is your only chance to save his life.”

The other alpha says nothing, his posture stiffening with rage. For a moment, there’s just the gasping sounds of pain from the man Kylo holds in his fist. When the leader of the pack still says nothing, it’s clear he won’t back down.

Kylo digs his claws in deeper, vanishing up to the knuckle. Awful, choking noises fill the night, and Mara’s head throbs. It’s too much. The scent of blood, the anger still pounding in her veins, the heightened senses. Should she do something, to try to stop Kylo?

The thought crosses her mind, but she just stands there, paralyzed. There’s something primal in her, and it wants the threat against them to be over. It’s desperate and defensive, and for a moment it overrules reason. She says nothing.

Blood now cover’s Kylo’s hand and wrist, the stench of it so thick in the air that she feels drunk from it. In one quick motion, Kylo rips the beta’s throat out and lets him drop. The man crumples, his hand jerking spastically to the open wound. The blood spurting and pooling there is so dark it looks black in the night. His body convulses only a moment or two before he falls still, the heart-wrenching sounds of agony finally stopping.

Mara wishes she could tear her eyes away, but she is too focused on the kill. That animalistic thing inside of her is content at the sight of the man, dead. It’s like a rush of aggressive pleasure, and she has to fight it back down. How could she think that? What is wrong with her? She feels disgusted with herself the moment she manages to look at him with human eyes.

“You think you can take her from me?” Kylo asks lowly. He steps over the body, not even sparing it a glance. “This is what happens, to anyone who tries to steal my mate.”

The other alpha growls, the sound enough to capture Mara’s attention. She pulls her eyes away from the dead body, and the pool of blood flooding the pavement around it, to focus on the threat ahead. He looks ready to fight, pointed canines visible when he snarls. His beta werewolves, however, are no longer committed.

Both of them retreat, their faces plainly terrified. Kylo doesn’t relent, prowling forward. When he speaks again, it’s directed to them.

“Go on,” he encourages. “Run now, and I won’t come after you.”

When they flee, their alpha roars furiously. It’s not enough to stop them, as both disappear between the trees. They run back into the woods, leaving the rest stop without even a look back at their betrayed leader. Kylo continues forward, giving the man no choice. He retreats, unwilling to take Kylo on alone.

“This isn’t over, you know,” the other alpha promises. “I can always make more betas.”

He turns and follows the younger members of his pack, heading into the trees. Kylo watches him go, his claws still out.

“I should finish him, now,” he says quietly, as if thinking to himself.

Mara makes a noise of weak protest. She’s had enough, revolted by the sight of the dead body. The animal in her likes his suggestion, the idea of eliminating the rest of the threat. She thinks logically, however, refusing to let that part of her take over any more. There’s been enough violence.

“I want to go,” she says, her voice trembling. “Can we go?”

Kylo’s head snaps back to her, the red fading immediately from his irises. His gaze darts down to the body, before understanding fills his features.

“Come on,” he says, reaching for her with the hand that isn’t drenched in blood. She flinches anyway, relieved only when he pulls her towards the truck.

Mara can’t help but look back as Kylo starts the engine. Are they just leaving the body lay there? Tears threaten to fall, but she tries to hold them back. What else can they do? It’s a stupid question to think. It’s not as if she can do anything to help the man now, and Kylo… Kylo hadn’t even looked at the man’s face when he tore open his carotid.

What’s worse than what Kylo had done is the fact that she hadn’t tried to stop him. She’d been overwhelmed with anger and instinct. It was so polar opposite to the human guilt she feels now, growing by the minute. The wolf felt nothing, not a shred of empathy over a life ended. That werewolf had been a threat to her and her mate, and seeing the threat ended had felt…

She clenches her hands into fists, trying to stop thinking about it. Trying to stop thinking like a wolf. She’s a good person, isn’t she? There was no other choice, was there? The shame builds, heavy and smothering. What is she turning into?

Maybe it wasn’t their fault. Neither her or Kylo had asked for a fight, after all. That pack had brought the conflict, and the results, on themselves. And she has no doubt the alpha wouldn’t have hesitated to turn her, take her, against her will. But that logic does little to soothe her conscience. It doesn't erase the memory of satisfaction seeing Kylo kill.

Mara looks into the darkened rest stop as they pass, a dull red flashing in the windows. That teenage boy is going to come out eventually. Or maybe someone else will pull up. Someone from the electric company, perhaps, or another traveler. The body will be found soon.

Mara lets her head thud back against the seat, the consequences fully hitting her. The police will come, and she has no idea if there were cameras inside the rest stop. But if there are, they’ll see her and Kylo.

**Later**

They haven’t been driving for long when they stop. Kylo pulls into a gas station, one that is clearly closed. The lights are all off, and there are no cars in sight. They circle the building, the door to the restroom giving in to a single brutal kick from Kylo.

He flips the light on, washing the blood from his skin. Mara is silent, watching red water swirl down the drain. He pulls his shirt off when he’s done, using it to wrap around his arm like a makeshift bandage. The gashes there from the other wolf’s claws are still seeping blood. 

Then back out to the truck they go, Mara feeling spacey as Kylo searches his bag for a new shirt. He shuts the door to the backseat when he’s done, climbing into the driver’s side. She avoids returning his gaze, until he reaches up to click on the overhead light.

“Mara?”

She looks up at his questioning tone, searching his face. There’s concern there, something resigned in his brown eyes. 

“I-I just…” she stutters, shaking her head slightly. She can’t seem to phrase what’s going on in her brain. “That was awful.”

“I know,” he says. “But it was the easiest way out I could find, that minimized risk.”

“Minimized risk!?” Mara repeats dully. “You killed him, how is that minimizing anything?”

“Minimized risk to you,” Kylo clarifies. “I could tell two of his betas were scared. They just needed a push to back down.”

“But maybe…maybe he didn’t have to die,” she whispers weakly.

“Sure, maybe he didn’t,” Kylo agrees halfheartedly. “But if I didn’t do that, that alpha would have thought he had a whole pack to back him up. Maybe he would’ve attacked. Then what? He was right, I was outnumbered. And you could’ve been hurt.”

Mara shrugs one shoulder, giving up. If she’s being honest, that isn’t even the thing really bothering her. It’s the shame at what she’d felt, the worry over the loss of humanity. She feels like a monster is nesting inside her, taking over bit by bit. But she’s reluctant to say it aloud, to give words to her fear. She feels his hand brush hers and looks down to where their fingers intertwine.

“I know it’s hard to see,” Kylo says slowly. “I remember when it used to make me sick…But…This is how it is with most wolves. Territory, mates, everything… it all gets resolved with claws and teeth. Animals don’t have morals.”

She doesn’t know how to answer. Her thoughts feel scattered, her energy drained. Instead of replying, she just squeezes his hand gently.

**Very Late at Night**

It’s hours later when they leave the most remote of paved roads. They turn off, and for a moment Mara thinks Kylo is trying to drive straight into a tree trunk. But there’s a clearing in the trees, just visible by the headlights. They drive slowly, the truck barely fitting through in some spots. But eventually the trail becomes more visible. It’s dirt and the barest trace of gravel, guiding them onward.

They’re climbing upwards, the terrain rough. Further up the mountain, further away from the rest of the world. They only pass a few turnoffs, one of which has tire tracks. Otherwise, the area is secluded as the trail seems to continue forever.

Mara feels like she can breathe for the first time since they’d left the rest stop, and tries to relax in her seat. That supernatural anger has gone, and she likes that she feels more human.

The trees are dense enough that the moon is only visible in tiny glimpses overhead. It peaks through the canopy of leaves and pine needles, its weak light occasionally gracing the ground. They cross a stream on a narrow metal bridge, before the trail curves sharply.

“Are you feeling better?” Kylo asks uncertainly.

“I’m fine,” she assures him. But her voice comes out false, and she knows the lie must be easy to spot.

“We’re almost there,” he says. “I think you’ll feel better once we can stop running.”

Mara nods halfheartedly, before she realizes she has no idea where they are headed. Obviously, the location is ridiculously remote, judging by the path they’re now on.

“What is this place, anyway?” she asks.

Kylo darts a glance at her, before explaining. “It’s property that was owned by a friend of my mother’s. It got passed on, through the pack.”

“You think we’ll be safe there?” Mara presses.

“The cabin is warded,” Kylo replies. “It’s a kind of guard, against magic. If what your mother said to you is true, then you’ll be protected there. The Order won’t be able to track you.”

She furrows her brows, confused. “How does that work?”

“I don’t pretend to know much about magic,” he admits, shrugging. “But I know there are places where the energy is strong, and places where it’s weak. This is one of the weak places. Combined with the building materials and sigils, it acts like a giant shield against the kind of stuff the Order uses.”

“That sounds useful. Why don’t you live there all the time?”

“I did,” Kylo says. “But then I felt you. I tried ignoring it, at first. Told myself I was fine alone, but...I’d dream about you every night. I didn’t even know your name, what you looked like… Nothing. But I woke up every morning missing you.”

Mara looks down at her lap, taken aback by what he’s said. She feels like she still has so much to learn about him, so many questions she wants to ask. She’s only known him a few weeks, and yet he’s been dreaming of her for months. Silence lingers between them, stones dinging the underside of the vehicle as they continue on.

Eventually, they slow to a stop. Mara looks up, taking in the dark shape of the cabin before them. It’s got a large chimney on one side, with a porch that wraps around towards the back. Several steps lead up to the front door, the whole building looking like it’s made of timber and stone.

Kylo cuts the lights on the truck before she can study it further. “Has something changed?” he asks quietly, seeming to struggle for the right words. “Everything I’ve done… You’re all that matters to me. I will do what I have to, to keep you safe.”

Mara frowns with guilt at the worry obvious in his voice. She knows she’s been quiet since what happened at the rest stop, and Kylo must have read into it. She fumbles awkwardly across the seat, getting closer. Kylo stays still while she finds his face in the dark, tracing his cheek.

She has to prop herself up with a knee on the seat to reach his lips, and there’s a gentleness to how he kisses her back. He’s restrained, tentative. Mara lets her hand slide down to his neck, pulling him closer. She tilts her face, angling for more of him. His taste reassures her, soothing her thoughts. Kissing him is the only thing that feels right to her at the moment. Everything else feels like a mess, but Kylo… he is still hers. She feels the need for him grow, the longer their lips touch.

Kylo finally seems to let go of his worry, kissing her back with a growing hunger. His fingertips wind through her hair, playing with the locks. Then his hand drops to her leg, his thumb stroking down along her inner thigh.

A soft sound escapes her as she wraps her arms around his neck, trying to lock him close to her. But Kylo only teases her tongue with his, before pulling back.

“Let’s get you inside,” he suggests. “Then I need to do a lap around the perimeter.”

“Huh?” Mara mutters, stubbornly catching him in another kiss. He allows it, until she sucks on his lower lip hungrily. A growl escapes his chest, his hand sliding around her neck to ease her back. She looks up at him ruefully, wondering if he can see the expression in the dark.

“I’ll be quick,” Kylo assures.

She nods. “Why do you have to?”

“It’s been a while since I’ve been here,” he explains. “My scent is probably faded.”

Mara raises an eyebrow skeptically, her sense of humor making a feeble attempt at coming back to life. “What do you do, run around peeing on the trees?”

Kylo scoffs. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

He swings open the car door, climbing down while she searches for a witty response. But she’s tired, and it evades her. She gives up with a sigh.

“I don’t even know if it would seem weird at this point,” Mara admits.

Kylo reaches for her, sliding her across the seat and helping her find her footing on the gravel they’ve parked on. “Pissing on trees isn’t required, but I’ll be sure to work it in for you,” he assures sarcastically.

“Good. I’m into that,” she retorts. She doesn’t bother arguing when he grabs her bags for her, dragging herself after him towards the door. He unlocks it, reaching inside to flip on the lights before ushering her in.

Mara steps through the door, somewhat surprised by the place. She’d been expecting it to be rustic, but it’s finished quite nicely. It’s a big open floorplan, the small kitchen and dining space flowing right into the living area. The back wall is mostly windows, though thick curtains are pulled across them. There’s a huge fireplace in front of the couches, old cinders visible on the hearth.

Mara follows Kylo with the bags up a wooden staircase. The bedroom is in the loft at the top, and he drops their stuff on a low bench. The mattress is big, but bare.

Kylo follows her gaze. “All the bedding is in the cedar chests,” he explains, pointing over to where the wooden chests are nestled under the single window of the loft. “I can make it when I get back.”

She suppresses a yawn. “I can figure out how to make a bed, Kylo.”

Mara’s barely finished the yawn when he ducks down, pressing a quick kiss to her lips. “I’ll be right back,” he assures.

She opens her eyes to meet his, appreciating the tender look she finds there. She nods. “You better.”

His lips quirk in a small grin, before he heads back to the staircase. “Sorry there’s no food, I didn’t know if I’d be coming back,” he calls as he descends. “We can do a grocery run tomorrow.”

“Sounds good,” Mara agrees, distracted.

Her eyes are roaming the wood ceiling. She wonders over to the nearest lamp, switching it on. There are exposed beams up high, and she studies the marks in them. Symbols are carved there intermittently, but she doesn’t recognize any of them. Then again, why would she? She spent most of her childhood rolling her eyes at her mom’s magical spells. Mara suddenly wishes she’s paid better attention.

She explores the main part of the cabin, finding the bathroom and looking through the kitchen cupboards. Down on this level, she also finds random symbols. They’re etched into the glass of the windows, and carved into the front door.

Mara makes her way back upstairs, busying herself with making the bed. Then she sprawls across the foot of it, tired but wanting to wait for Kylo.

Only a few minutes of lying there, and so many nights of subpar sleep catch up to her. She dozes off, into a fitful sleep. Immediately, a dream comes that is more like a nightmare. Mara can tell something is wrong the moment it starts. It’s a surprisingly vivid dream, though her awake mind lingers somewhere in the background.

There’s a creature inside her, thrashing to get out. Its movements hurt her, and though the pain is only implied in the dream, she tries to scream. Her voice is silenced, however. Nothing comes out no matter how much she tries to force it.

There is the wolf, twisted and unnatural, trapped inside her flesh. It’s clawing to get free, shredding her apart from the inside. Its nails dig into her throat, as it drags itself up from her belly. She just chokes and thrashes, trying to survive the emergence of the beast, her mouth stretched open in a mimicry of horror. There’s fur and blood on her tongue-

Mara snaps awake, shoving herself upright. She sits there, panting and trying to settle herself. Somehow, she’d known while it was happening that it was just a dream. But it was still disturbing… and her mind can’t help but suggest, it’s not that far from her actual fate.

She gets up, forcing herself to pace the cabin to stay awake. Figures the moment she can actually rest, she starts having messed up nightmares. After everything that’s happened, it is unsurprising that her unconscious brain wants to act up.

Mara’s roaming aimlessly, making a lap back from the kitchen when she hears a noise outside. She stops, facing the door. There’s another sound, something like a large animal moving. For one awful moment, she imagines the worst. That it’s another alpha, or a whole pack coming to snatch her away.

But then Kylo’s howl meets her ears, chasing away the worry. It’s softer than she remembers, even as the volume rises up to fill the night. Mara approaches the door, opening it to peek outside. The lights from inside the cabin glare off the truck’s windshield, but she can’t see him yet. The woods are dark and quiet following the wolf’s call.

Kylo emerges, trotting towards the steps. She still can’t believe how large he is as a wolf. In the dark, he might even pass for a bear without a good look. His eyes are red, fading to brown as he gets closer. Mara moves out of the way, holding the door open so he can come inside.

She reaches out a hand to feel his fur when he passes through the doorway, barely fitting. It feels coarser on his shoulder, but softens towards his side. She gives him a sheepish smile, nudging the door shut with her foot.

Mara’s uncertain if she should touch him again, or if he wants to change back. But Kylo nudges her shoulder with his muzzle, whining. She takes it as encouragement, stroking the jet black fur of his neck. He feels warm to the touch, his eyes watching her curiously. The scent of pine clings to his fur from the trees outside, and she ends up moving closer to wrap her arms around him.

She remembers his worry from earlier, that something had changed between them. She tries to put him at ease. 

“Nothing’s changed,” she admits quietly. “Except me…”


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Smut ahead

She had fallen asleep tucked into warm, black fur, Kylo’s massive wolf body curled around her. When she wakes up, Mara finds her face pressed into soft skin instead. She kicks her legs free of the blankets, Kylo’s body heating her up to the point of being too warm.

If she had to guess, she’d assume it to be late morning. The sunlight coming through the windows is bright, too bright to ignore and fall back asleep. Something feels different upon waking, though Mara can’t quite figure out what. She just feels better, calmed by a safe haven and a good night’s sleep.

She stretches lazily, taking a deep breath. She slept peacefully against Kylo, the nightmare from before staying away. The fear is gone with it. It’s replaced with a feeling of content at how easily she fits beside Kylo, tucked underneath his arm. It’s like all of her worries have taken a backseat. She can relax, finally.

Kylo’s scent and hers are mingled in the bed around them, the combination filling her brain. There’s a word for this bed, warm with their scent, but her human mind can’t pinpoint it. She feels safe, though. Safer than she has in a long time, and it lets her focus fully on the man laying beneath her. Though his bare chest still rises and falls evenly, she can tell her stirring has at least partially woken him.

She licks her lips, planting a hand to prop herself up above him, and kissing Kylo’s chest. He stirs, a grumbling sound coming from his throat. Another kiss, and the grumbling turns to a noise of content. She moves down his body slowly, letting her lips and tongue explore his skin with a lazy pace. The taste of him urges her on, as she lets go of the control she’s been clinging to around him. Instinct can take over instead, and it spurs her on.

Mara nudges the blankets below his waist, eyeing the noticeable bulge beneath the sheets. She reaches down to palm him, stroking him through the fabric. Kylo rewards her with a surprised moan, but catches her hand when she moves to tug the sheets down further. He intertwines their fingers, and she looks up to see crimson peek from under his lashes.

“That’s a hell of a way to wake a guy up,” he mumbles sleepily, his dark hair a mess across his face and the pillow.

“Let go of my hand and I’ll finish waking you up,” Mara suggests. His laugh makes her smile, even as she tries to tug her hand loose from his grip. When he doesn’t release her, she bends to attempt to nudge the sheets down with her nose instead. 

Kylo’s laughter deepens as he watches her. “Someone’s feeling frisky,” he teases.

She makes a soft noise of frustration, resorting to rubbing her cheek across the firm evidence of his morning arousal. When she looks up again, Kylo is wide awake. He’s watching her, so she presses her lips to the sheets, right where they conceal the head of his cock. The playful smile leaves his lips, heat transforming his expression into something more intimidating.

“Is that yours?” he asks.

“Mmhmm,” she mumbles, distracted. Though she can tell he’s still trying to tease her, his voice betrays his lust. His fingers loosen their grip, enough that she can pull her hand free.

Mara sits up to boldly strip her top off, tossing it aside. Kylo’s gaze drops immediately to her bare chest, his sigh loud enough to be detectable.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he breathes.

She smiles mischievously, planting her hands just above his knees. She works her way up, finding his thighs beneath the sheets and stroking them, before tracing with her nails.

“The full moon is tomorrow night,” he says softly, absentmindedly.

“So?” Mara asks, not understanding what that has to do with anything at the moment. She pulls the sheets down slowly, waiting for Kylo to stop her again. He doesn’t, letting her expose him.

“So, it… It affects you,” Kylo tries to explain. “It brings out your instincts, makes it harder to…to…”

He gives up, inhaling sharply when she kisses the tip of him again, now that the sheets are out of the way. She stares up into his eyes, vivid red, while she trails his length with her tongue. There’s a hint of conflict in his face, though she can’t understand why.

All she can focus on is how much she wants him, how long she’s been waiting. Isn’t he tired of waiting? Why does he look like he’s still trying to think? She’s given up on thinking, given up on anything but this.

“Maybe we should-” Kylo tries to talk again, but she takes his cock into her mouth. She moans around him eagerly, horny enough that she doesn’t care how desperate she seems. He abandons whatever he’d been trying to say, a noise catching in his throat.

She tries to keep her eyes on him, as he props himself up on his elbows. Kylo watches her fill her mouth with him. But the temptation to close her eyes is too much, and she lets her lids close to focus on the taste of him on her tongue. She only pulls back long enough to work her hand down over his head, slicking it to settle around his shaft.

Then she returns her mouth to him, finding a rhythm that works. She’s greedy, lust taking over her actions until all she can focus on is her need, on filling herself with him. She makes sure he can feel all of her, lips, tongue, the back of her throat as she angles to try to get more of him. His size makes it a little challenging, her hand having to make up for what she knows she won’t be able to take.

She’s shamelessly noisy, moans and whimpers muffled by his girth that fills her mouth completely. But it doesn’t matter to her at the moment if she’s too loud. All that matters is making him feel good, and giving them both what they need. She shifts, setting her elbow down on the mattress between his thighs so she can caress his scrotum with her other hand.

Kylo swears aggressively, at the same time her mind registers a ripping sound. She looks up, leaving just the tip of him in her mouth, blinking with confusion. He’s dug his claws into the bed, ripping right through the sheets.

The muscles in his arms are hard, his body tensed with restraint. It’s clear he’s struggling to control himself, and yet she doesn’t feel guilty at all. She just wants to test him further, to watch the control fail and to reap the rewards. He looks so sexy like this, coming undone for her.

Kylo’s eyes lock on hers. “I… I want to take you,” he admits, voice tense. “I want to fuck you into this mattress until you’re screaming for me.”

She swirls her tongue against him, watching his eyes close. She’s never enjoyed a blowjob quite this much before, but watching Kylo’s jaw clench, his lip quiver, makes it so pleasurable. She hollows her cheeks, working on creating more suction.

“Fuck… _Fuck_ …”

Mara refocuses, finding a better way to keep her tongue moving while sucking. She’s rewarded with the taste of precum, and she moans again when her desire surges. She works her head down lower again until her tongue finds his frenulum. It’s hard to keep the rhythm between her hand and mouth, as the sounds he’s making keep distracting her. 

“I want to-need to mark you,” Kylo growls, breathing harder as his claws rip deeper into the mattress. “Mine-fuck, _my mate.”_

His voice like that, deep and rough, affects her. Arousal reminds her that her hunger for him is still unsatiated. She wants more, wants to be pinned beneath him while he claims her with his mouth and his cock. Her pace increases, her hand working him until he’s moaning with her, his hips jerking up to meet her mouth.

“I’m going to-fuck, are you going to taste me?” he asks.

She makes a noise, hoping it sounds like muffled consent. Kylo swears, again and again, under his breath until even his dirty mouth fails him. She can tell he’s close when he goes completely silent, taking him deeper. When he finishes, she swallows the warmth spilling into her throat, and keeps swallowing until he’s spent.

She sits back, looking up to see Kylo open his eyes. The tension has left his muscles, his claws shrunk back into short, entirely human nails. But his eyes are still that vivid red, as they have been so often lately. She wonders if it’s the full moon approaching or her presence that brings the red out.

Mara wipes her face, realizing she’s made a mess of her lips and chin. She’d never been too confident in her technique, and she clearly hadn’t done the neatest job. But if the faintly bitter taste of his cum lingering in the back of her mouth is any indication, she’d done well enough.

Kylo sits up, reaching out to coax her thighs apart. Her arousal is obvious, wetness having soaked through the material of her panties. His gaze fixates between her thighs, somehow hungrier now despite his recent orgasm.

“Lie down,” he orders quietly.

Mara hesitates for just a second, wondering if he’s going to take her. Would this be her last morning before the bite completes her transformation? And shouldn’t some part of her be worried? She’d been worried just yesterday, hadn’t she? But every rational thought has left her, and nothing remains to hold her back.

Kylo growls at her hesitation, his red eyes flashing to hers. His expression no longer holds conflict, like it had before. He looks fervent, as if he too has given in fully to desire.

“ _Lie down.”_

She moves immediately to obey his command, a throb deep inside her making her breath catch. There’s something in his voice when he talks like that. Something that takes over her, makes it impossible to not listen.

When she’s settled on her back, he takes her panties off. She’s expecting him to be rough, impatient. But he does it delicately, pulling them gently down off her curves. When they’re gone, he guides her legs wider so he can fit between them. His hands trail lightly over her skin, stroking teasingly on her inner thighs.

“Do you like when I touch you?” he asks softly.

“Yes,” Mara breathes immediately. “I love it,” she admits. She likes the way his hands feel on her, the way he somehow balances sweetness in his touch with dominance. She’s gotten used to his kisses and caresses, these last few days. But it’s never enough, is it?

Her eyes clamp closed when his fingers graze higher, before she forces them back open. She wants to watch him, to look at his face while he’s touching her. His fingers trace her entrance, trailing higher until he finds her clit, circling it gently. She’s already so turned on that she can’t hold back from voicing her pleasure. A lewd moan leaves her, her focus dropping to Kylo’s lips when he wets them.

“Are you going to take my bite?”

His voice is so deep, so perfect. Pleasure spikes and spasms in her at the question. She drags her focus from Kylo’s lips, full and pink and tempting, to meet the red of her alpha’s gaze. He doesn’t stop touching her, finding the perfect pattern as he watches her writhe.

“Kylo,” she breathes, fisting her hands in the sheets. It keeps her from reaching out to grab him, to sink her nails into his flesh and pull him down to her. The edge is already too close, her energy growing frantic. She’d gotten herself too worked up sucking his cock, and now his teasing is almost torturous.

“Answer me.”

Mara tries to focus on his gaze, to think through the lust. It’s impossible, however. Since she woke up wanting him, there’s only been heat and need ruling her. She nods.

“Yes.” The words tumble from her lips, desperate and rushed. “I want you to bite me, I need you to take me. Please, yes-”

Her breath escapes her in a rush, mouth falling open when he pushes his fingers into her. He quickly finds that perfect spot inside her. She twists her hands in the bedding, letting her head fall back as her bliss builds with his motions. She feels Kylo shift to lay down, and a moment later his warm lips graze her inner thighs.

“That’s good,” he breathes, laying kisses on her sensitive skin. “I love when you’re good for me, little mate.”

Kylo’s praise makes her head swim, his hair tickling her thighs. She whimpers, nearly sobbing when his tongue makes contact with her. He growls, his arms snaking under her legs to lift her pelvis up, burying his face in her.

She gives up on clinging to the sheets, burying her hands in Kylo’s hair. His tongue against her clit is heavenly, his words echoing in her mind. There’s too much instinct to battle against, too much relief in this. Her mate is going to take her, mark her. She reaches her peak quickly, finding release when the pleasure crests and rushes through her in waves.

She moans, trying to say his name over and over, soothing that part of her that needs to be his, to be claimed. As it starts to subside, she feels a pleasurable rush of relief. Her body is buzzing, sagging back against the mattress after the tension that had just wracked it.

Kylo kisses her thighs, freeing his shoulders from under her hips. He moves up beside her, pulling her into his side. Mara tries to steady her breathing, nuzzling into his chest. She can feel he’s still aroused, however. She shifts her leg over his hip, realizing he’s hard again.

She lets her hand wander down from his chest, over his stomach. The blur of lust is still there for her, only momentarily pushed back. Her fingertips trace the trail of dark hair that leads down from his belly button.

Kylo takes her hand in his. “We should be careful…” he says thoughtfully. “Or I should be, anyway.”

“Careful of what?” Mara asks, confused. She’d already said yes to him, hadn’t she? Why did they still need to be careful? She shifts their grip to play with his long fingers, winding hers through his, stroking.

“The human part of me still needs to be a little in control,” he explains. “I can’t lose myself completely.”

“Why not?” she murmurs.

“If I just let go…I wouldn’t do anything but fuck you,” he admits, laughing quietly.

Mara pushes herself up a little, to peek at Kylo. She’s rewarded with a grin, as he almost looks self-conscious. She smiles back at the cute expression, raising her eyebrows. 

“And that’s a problem?” she replies, with mock confusion.

His eyes search hers before he answers. “Yes. We still need to make sure we weren’t followed,” he points out. “And I need to be ready if another alpha trespasses on my territory.”

Mara sighs, burying her face back against him. “I guess I should try too, then…” she admits, voice muffled.

Even as she says it, though, she knows control is almost impossible. There is no trepidation left in her. The horror she’d felt over the animal growing inside her has been consumed by it, and now the wolf is only waiting. She can feel the instinct pulling her, stronger as the full moon approaches. It isn’t some separate creature anymore, either. It is her, and she is it.

Kylo’s arms tighten around her, and she feels his chest heave with a yawn. When he’s done, he comments, “Too late for that.”

“What?”

“You’ll probably lose control from the bite. It happens to most betas,” he admits. “But I’ll be there, until you come back.”

Mara sits up, surveying his face curiously. “What will it feel like?”

“The bite?” Kylo asks, brow furrowing.

She shakes her head, however. “No. Losing control. Turning into… you know.”

He considers that, his hand stroking her hip languidly while he thinks. “When it first happens, you become your needs,” he says slowly. “There isn’t good or bad, right or wrong… There’s just the world and you in it, taking what you need to survive. Following your senses, your instincts. There’s no thought, just hunger, or territory, or sex…”

“But you aren’t like that,” Mara points out. “When you’re a wolf. It’s like you’re still you in there.”

Kylo nods. “Yes. But it takes a while, to find balance.”

“Great,” she says sarcastically. Judging by how she’d woken this morning, there’s going to be one predominant need in her wolf brain. “I hope you enjoy a feral she-wolf humping your leg, then.”

Kylo laughs, the smile lingering on his face. The tenderness in his eyes makes her heart race, blushing despite the fact that they’re already naked in bed together. She’s trusting him with everything, with her entire future. But the adoring way he looks at her reassures her it’s the right call.

“You know…” Kylo trails off, shrugging slightly. “I think I can live with a feral she-wolf, as long as you come back for a visit eventually.”

Mara smiles, finally forcing herself to stand and stretch. They’ve lingered in the bed for too long. Her stomach is growling with hunger. She ignores Kylo’s noise of protest to make her way to the stairs.

“I need a shower,” she insists, pausing a few steps down to look back to him on the bed. “You can join me, if you want…”

She is still on the last step of the stairs when she hears him behind her, following. He catches her at the bottom, wrapping her up in a hug and towing her into the bathroom with him. She laughs at his eagerness, shivering while she waits for the water to get to the right temperature. Kylo disappears for a moment to grab towels.

Mara reaches in to feel the water, finding it lukewarm but slowly heating up. The mirror above the sink catches her movement, and she can’t help but look at her reflection. Her eyes stay on herself longer than they normally would. Her appearance brings to mind a whole slew of questions.

What would she look like, as a wolf? Would she look like Kylo? A normal looking, albeit massively large, wolf? Or would she look more like that first monster she’d encountered…some twisted version of a wolf, like from a horror movie? How was something like that even determined? Was it genetic, or something else?

Kylo returns, plopping the towels down on the vanity. “You okay?”

Mara nods, tearing her eyes away from the mirror. “Just…wondering what I’m going to look like furry.”

Kylo steps closer, reaching down to cradle her cheek. She looks up to search his gaze, comforted by the steadiness there.

“It’s going to be okay, Mara. It’s you, wolf or human,” he soothes. “You’ll still recognize yourself.”

She looks away, taken aback by his words. He’s somehow managed to pinpoint the worry that lurked in her reflection, chasing away fears she hadn’t even voiced. The wolf is her, and yet, it threatens to make the human part of her disappear.


End file.
